I think any husband knows when to stand down when it comes to domestic disputes. After 13 years of marriage, I even think I may have it figured out. — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
People see me on the 'Daily Show' or 'About a Boy'. But the reality is that I only got into this business to do… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
My daughter, who is 7 years old - I have no idea where she learned this - she made a video where she's beat-boxing.… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
I was a corporate hatchet man, and it's impossible for me to turn that off. It's this curse when I walk into businesses: 'That… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
We're down in Mexico. It's for a bachelor party, so we go into a Mexican strip club... I go back with this woman down a murky hallway, and then without missing a beat - these ladies are all business - she goes, 'Go ahead, take out your dong.' 'I'm not taking out my dong. And by the way, who uses… — Al Madrigal Copy Share
You re-watch 'Napoleon Dynamite', and there's a lot of thrift shopping that goes on in that movie; there's a lot of funny stuff. It's… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
Don't bring your sand toys to the park. That's another bad move. Because I go to the park, and I'm on the Vicodin and a little weed too - let's face it - and I go in there, and my wife's like, 'Bring the sand toys! Bring the sand toys!' And I know what happens every single time: I become… — Al Madrigal Copy Share
There are comics in L.A. doing impressions, and the first thing they do is hunch over and then start to do this bad Rick… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
I once called a guy into his own office and spun around in his own chair to greet him. That kind of thing may… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
My daughter plays keyboard very well, and my son plays guitar, and they're totally into music. — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
When my son was 3 years old - I'll never forget this - there was this homeless guy walking toward us, and my son… — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
I'm not much for setup... punch line. I talk about my kids. I talk about my wife. — Al Madrigal Copy Share Image
