The idea of MPs texting and emailing through debates makes my gorge rise, as it does when a minicab driver makes phone calls at the wheel. I'm not paying you to keep in touch with your mates! — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share Image
I pay higher premiums because my speeding points spell 'recklessness' to the insurance company, but you can't imagine how risk-averse I am at the wheel. I only go over 30 at all because it's dangerous to drive too much slower… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share Image
Makeup is only fun if it's occasional and capricious - just like it's a treat to have an empty day ahead, but it wouldn't… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
If you are actually ordinary, the only way to give royal status meaning is to live an extraordinary life. It can't be jeans and… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
Women are under-represented in TV comedy for a variety of reasons, the hackneyed 'fear that women aren't funny' being one of them. — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
My speeding offences (whether caught or not) are always in situations where the speed limit is 30, but I think it's 40. And I'm… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
When I was learning to drive, I thought the big milestones were changing gear, changing lane, and three-point-turns. — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
I know schools don't have money for everything, but I wish they could all have a couple of violins for kids to try; a… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
When I was 15, I still liked climbing trees and hiding in cupboards. — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
Given the choice, I'm sure the majority of children would rather have a packed lunch than school meals. — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
London Zoo is amazing. I want to take my child there so that she can feel the awe and wonder I felt (and feel)… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
Moisturise, moisturise, moisturise... is the motto of people who are in the business of selling moisturisers. Your body is already 60% water. If that's… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
Weight gain is good because it makes your dresses tight. This is not necessarily classy or flattering, but it means you don't have to… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
I never wanted poker to be a job. That's partly because I love it, and it's fun, and I didn't want it to stop… — Victoria Coren Mitchell Copy Share
