I care about facts the way I care about oxygen and imbibing enough water a day to live. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
It was probably years before I was confident enough in stand-up that I was able to talk about the things I wanted… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way. — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I was definitely prepared for it to be slower, and it has not worked out that way in any shape or form.… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I have occasionally - if ever I do interviews that are difficult or nerve-wracking - I take my wife's dog tags and… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I think being an outsider in general always helps you in comedy. I think it helps to have an outsider's eye. And… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
Most stand-ups, once they have done it, think of it as their default job. I'm pretty sure Jon Stewart still feels that… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
You have to do stand-up quite a long time before you learn how to do it well. It was probably years before… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I think the best analogy for where we are right now is that America is Elvis Presley -- the most beautiful, talented,… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I've always been interested in socially political, or overtly political, comedy. And I guess I've always liked to channel some kind of personal element… — John Oliver Copy Share
I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting… — John Oliver Copy Share
Once you learn how to make people laugh, then you get to choose exactly how you want to make them laugh. — John Oliver Copy Share
When you see people say crazy things on our show, they mean this stuff,and that's easy to forget: They're not joking. — John Oliver Copy Share
I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to… — John Oliver Copy Share
I guess the tone of jokes is often, at best, irreverent, but it always comes from a place of deep love. — John Oliver Copy Share
I'm always interested in audience interaction. Not so much aggressive audience interaction - I'm genuinely interested in how people see things. — John Oliver Copy Share
I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I… — John Oliver Copy Share
If you work on a comedy show, your basic form of communication is teasing. That's generally how we speak to each other: you communicate… — John Oliver Copy Share
Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath. — John Oliver Copy Share
I've made so many people angry that they kind of blur into one unpleasant memory of people staring at you with somewhere between passive… — John Oliver Copy Share
Armando Iannucci is one of my heroes. As I was growing up, he was probably the most influential comic voice that I had. — John Oliver Copy Share
