The English language needs a word for that feeling you get when you badly need help, but there is no one you can call because you're not popular enough to have friends, not rich enough to have employees, and not… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“A realization washed over her in that cold, dark space: this was how virtually all living things born on earth have died—with teeth tearing… — David Wong Copy Share
“Let’s say you have an ax. Just a cheap one, from Home Depot. On one bitter winter day, you use said ax to behead… — David Wong Copy Share
“John, let me make one thing clear,” Jim said, cutting me off in his most stern, evangelical voice. “Every man is blessed with his… — David Wong Copy Share
“John ducked casually across some DO NOT DUCK CASUALLY ACROSS THIS TAPE tape” — David Wong Copy Share
“Marconi said, "I see you have your instruments. Can any of you sing? The old spirituals work best." John said, "I can sing." I… — David Wong Copy Share
“It’s the microscopic parasite that causes malaria. Nearly half of all human deaths in recorded history have been caused by this invisible assassin. One… — David Wong Copy Share
At this point two elderly security guards in parkas, the guys who normally work the front desk at the plant, asked John to step… — David Wong Copy Share
“I stared at the price tags and thought, Why don’t you fucking kill yourself? I have that thought a lot, actually. Hey, did you… — David Wong Copy Share
“Well, you’d better hope I am because the world was built by sociopaths, men willing to send a million innocent boys into battle to… — David Wong Copy Share
There is no word in the English language for the feeling someone gets when they suddenly realize they're standing next to an unholy monster… — David Wong Copy Share
“Around us, the disembodied human limbs were piling up, forming a circle around the fountain, fusing themselves to each other like Satan’s LEGO set.” — David Wong Copy Share
“I tried to say something cool, wound up stammering something like, “WANNA YOU WANNA WEENIE ME?” The end kind of trailed off in a… — David Wong Copy Share
John flung himself into a pseudo-karate stance, one hand poised behind him and one in front, posed like a cartoon cactus. I thought for… — David Wong Copy Share
“Imagine fifty thousand men trapped on a desert island, deprived of food and water and sex but somehow kept alive for fifty thousand years.… — David Wong Copy Share
