You know what they say: 'Why sit at a table that doesn't have key lime pie on it if you don't have… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
It takes a level of creative depression to hear 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' and weep. — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
If you have to ask someone to change, to tell you they love you, to bring wine to dinner, to call you… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
As most doctors will tell you, cleansing is ridiculous. You know what's been around longer than that state-of-the-art juicer? Your kidneys. And… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
Are there moments when I see unrequited crushes or ex-boyfriends slow dancing with their dates and kind of want to stab myself… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
Hey there.' I cleared my throat. 'How are you?' I'm engaged!' Incidentally, this is an unacceptable answer to that question. — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
I love to bake, so I made vanilla bean and blueberry muffins for sick hospital children. Just kidding! All of that is… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
I think the rule of thumb should be this: if you preface a sentence about a friend with the phrase, 'I love… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
Sometimes in New York, you're walking down the street and you realize there's a girl walking in front of you whose thighs… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
There's an 'Everything must go!' emotional liquidation feel to the end of your twenties, isn't there? What will happen if we turn… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
There's already a marriage clock, a career clock, a biological clock. Sometimes being a woman feels like standing in the lobby of… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
You feel like telling him you're not single in the way that he thinks you're single. After all, you have yourself. I… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
Ladies. Large masses of girls are often prone to this salutation. I hate being mollified with this unsolicited "ladies" business. I know… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share Image
“Names I am most commonly called by telemarketers: Simone, Slain, Siobhan, Flo, Stacey, Susan, Slater, Leanne, and Slow (Yes, my parents named me "Slow".… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
“I’m not sure how the ponies happened, though I have an inkling: “Can I get you anything?” I’ll say, getting up from a dinner… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
As most New Yorkers have done, I have given serious and generous thought to the state of my apartment should I get killed during… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
“If I could just get my partner to see me how she used to - to fall in love with me all over again… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
I don't really think of my essays as being about myself. I know it sounds insane, but I just don't think of them as… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
It takes a level of creative depression to hear 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' and weep. — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
I wouldn't want to live in Berlin. It's bombed out and there's a lot of techno. — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
The reason that war is such a fascinating subject for writers is because it's a revealer. Put a bunch of people in an adrenaline-fuelled,… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
“Shortly after this exchange my roommate suggested we start throwing water balloons at the construction workers. Not really at them because, I know, I… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
When it seems impossible that a deep connection with another person could just go away instead of changing form. It seems impossible that you… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
Because I am a horrible flincher, contact lenses are not an option. I'm always envious of contact-wearers. There are endless reasons to take off… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
“How can we not still be rooting for the younger versions of ourselves as if they actually exist, playing catch-up in time? Who wouldn’t… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
There is no such thing as a crazy dog person in New York. Are there people who are completely insane about their dogs? Hordes.… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
As most doctors will tell you, cleansing is ridiculous. You know what's been around longer than that state-of-the-art juicer? Your kidneys. And your liver.… — Sloane Crosley Copy Share
