Critics say it's illegal for Donald Trump to run for president while hosting a TV show. It's also illegal to run for… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The Secret Service said there have been 40 fence-jumping incidents at the White House in the past five years. Half of them… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama has decided that he wants his presidential library to be in Chicago, not Hawaii. Today Hawaii's governor said, 'Great, who's… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Yesterday, the country of Kosovo unveiled an 11-foot tall statue of former President Clinton. Yeah. That's right. The Clinton statue is so… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Earlier today, President Bush said Kerry will be a tough and hard-charging opponent. That explains why Bush's nickname for Kerry is math. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama held a ceremony at the White House to celebrate the first night of Hanukkah. In response, Republicans said, 'It's even… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A congressman sent a tweet that compared president Obama to Adolf Hitler. He has now apologized. It's not helping that he apologized… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Time magazine has selected their person of the year. Guess what, it's President-elect Barack Obama. Yeah, ironically, Ebony magazine announced their person… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama announced that he's going to reopen diplomatic relations with Cuba. He wants to act before Seth Rogen makes a movie… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Texas Senator Ted Cruz said if elected president he would abolish the Department of Education. But not to worry. He promised to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
For the first time ever, a black Republican woman has been elected to Congress. President Obama told her, 'You are all set.… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Governor Chris Christie says if he's president, he will crack down on the sale of marijuana. However, that was before he was… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
Herman Cain compared his run for president to Moses leading his people out of Egypt. Cain said it took Moses 40 years… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Obama says he will not support a healthcare plan where the government gets to decide whether to, quote, 'pull the plug… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
The Senate has sent President Obama a spending bill that gives the government enough money to keep going for two weeks. Our… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
This morning President Obama met with Britain's Prince William in the Oval Office. It was a meeting between a symbolic ruler with… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
President Bush left for Canada today to attend a trade summit. Reportedly, the trade summit got off to an awkward start when… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
A federal court has ruled that the U.S. Postal Service must reduce its stamp prices. The change in stamp prices is expected to affect… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
NBC is making a movie about Martha Stewart that will cover the recent stock scandal. They are thinking of calling it 'The Road To… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
People should say 'no comment' more often. No comment! I love no comment. Let's have more no comment. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
A new study reveals that one-third of babies in the U.S. have used a smartphone. Yeah, and one-third of babies in China have MADE… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
Martha Stewart showed up at Manhattan FBI Headquarters to have her finger prints taken and pose for a mug shot. Then Martha explained how… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
LEGO has announced that they are shutting down their U.S. factory and moving it to Canada. LEGO employees say it's their fault because they… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
A new survey reveals that women would rather give up sex than give up the remote control for the TV. Men, on the other… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
Yesterday the DEA raided several NFL teams suspected of giving prescription painkillers to their players. In its defense, the New York Jets' doctor said,… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
President Obama gave a speech about healthcare tonight, and yesterday he gave a pep talk to students. He told them that in order to… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts. — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
“Disappointment leads to clarity, which leads to conviction and true originality.” — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
John Travolta said he sometimes lets his friends take control of his airplane even though they don't know what they're doing. Then Travolta said… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
President Obama filled in as the coach of his daughter Sasha's basketball team. Sasha evidently listened to her Dad, because all she did was… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
President Obama and Vladimir Putin are both in China attending the same economic summit. Obama saw Putin and said, 'After those midterms, it's nice… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share
