Tonight theres a new reality show on Fox: Fast Animals, Slow Children. -Peter Griffin — Family Guy Copy Share Image
All right, all right, make like Siamese twins and split... And then one of you die. -Peter Griffin — Family Guy Copy Share Image
“This is life, the one you get so go and have a ball, because the world don't move, to the beat of… — Seth MacFarlane Copy Share Image
Life is full of important decisions like whether or not you got time to masturbate. — Peter Griffin Copy Share Image
I had such a crush on her. Until I met you, Lois. Youre my silver medal. -Peter Griffin — Family Guy Copy Share Image
Hey hey, where the hell is that Peter Griffin? He told me he'd give me a hundred dollars if I took off… — Peter Griffin Copy Share Image
Sorry Meg. Daddy loves ya, but Daddy also loves Star Trek, and in all fairness, Star Trek was here first. -Peter Griffin — Family Guy Copy Share Image
“Sometimes I really do feel that Peter Griffin is right about the clouds plotting against us.” — Rickey Russell Copy Share Image
Dear McGyver: Enclosed is a paper clip, a rubber band, and a drinking straw. Please save our dog. -Peter Griffin — Family Guy Copy Share Image
Darth Vader : Luc I am your father Peter Griffin : Im Peter Griffin Darth Vader : Thank fuckin god, I was… — Author Name Copy Share Image
I think the lesson here is, it really doesnt matter where youre from, as long as were all the same religion. -Peter… — Family Guy Copy Share Image
And Joe, Ive had new neighbors before, but none of them were half the man you are. Since youre half a man… — Family Guy Copy Share Image
At a friends house.. There Landlord is in the kitchen. Her dad comes in the room and pulled out his phone and… — Jasmine Laura Copy Share Image
