The phrase 'I just turn on my monkey and it makes me feel good' sounds very dirty, but I can't explain why.… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
The wonderful thing about a book is that you have a canvas that is 300 pages wide, and it's all free space.… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
If somebody is not on the same page with me humor wise, I can't give them that. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
I have days where the only words I say are to the person making my sandwich at the grocery store. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
“Humility is what you strive for when you've failed at everything else.” — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
A comic strip has a rhythm and a pattern, and you got to get in and out quick. So you set up a joke,… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
I like characters who have blind spots and are full of themselves, but there also needs to be vulnerability. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
If you put me in 'South Park,' that audience is going to fall asleep in five minutes. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
When you can't draw chameleons and you can't draw blenders, it's a bad idea to write strips where chameleons become blenders. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
Thomas, my 15-year-old, is effectively my editor, I've always trusted his voice, more than anybody, on the strip for years. He has one of… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
I think it might surprise the average person how angry people can get over the comics. — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
You can't just count on becoming a syndicated cartoonist. I actually tried to calculate the odds once, and the best I could come up… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
A stand-up comedian faces the audiences and gets their immediate feedback. I hide behind the comic strip, and unless people write to me, I… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
“I know that if I am to move forward like the professional that I am, I must first see the past with mature eyes.… — Stephan Pastis Copy Share Image
