I'd take a helicopter up and throw microwave ovens down on the Taco Bell. — Douglas Coupland Copy Share Image
Should I warm the oven and bake you a batch of hero cookies? - Zephyra — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
They say you're not supposed to put metal in a microwave oven. They're right. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
On Thanksgiving, you realize you're living in a modern world. Millions of turkeys baste themselves in millions of ovens that clean themselves. — George Carlin Copy Share Image
Pre-heat the oven? Really? If I was the sort of person who planned ahead, I wouldn't be eating this Totino's Party Pizza… — Adam Peterson Copy Share Image
Cocks are a lot like ovens. You would rather a woman was operating it but sometimes you have to use it yourself. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I can do basics, but I'm not a proper cook. I can do a roast. I can stick a chicken in the… — Lesley Nicol Copy Share Image
If the mother had not beene in the oven, shee had never sought her daughter there. — George Herbert Copy Share Image
We've got a wood-burning pizza oven in the garden - a luxury, I know, but it's one of the best investments I've… — Gwyneth Paltrow Copy Share Image
I tried to commit suicide by sticking my head in the oven, but there was a cake in it. — Lesley Boone Copy Share Image
What is the difference between burning and gassing people in ovens and doing it to a whole nation out in the open? — Norodom Sihanouk Copy Share Image
I am no theologian. I would not be surprised, however, if Heaven proved to be a cozy kitchen, where delicious treats appeared… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
A cherry pie is . . . ephemeral. From the moment it emerges from the oven it begins a steep decline: from… — Nick Harkaway Copy Share Image
The natural term of an apple-pie is but twelve hours. It reaches its highest state about one hour after it comes from… — Henry Ward Beecher Copy Share Image
Ask a footballer what they can cook and they always say spaghetti. It is what you reach for when there is nothing… — Giles Coren Copy Share Image
I always buy the smaller turkeys. On the pre-baste put pats of butter on the meat under the skin, put the skin… — Sandra Lee Copy Share Image
I have avoided becoming stale by putting a little water on the plate, lying on the plate, and having myself refreshed in… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
Note, however, that you cannot simply add temperatures the way you can add volumes or weights. Two people in bed, each with… — Neil deGrasse Tyson Copy Share Image
I get really cool gifts, and I know this sounds really lame, but I think one of the best gifts I've ever… — Ashley Benson Copy Share Image
Ooo, let’s see, I need to get my spicy barbecue sauce. Definitely some oven mitts, ‘cause he’s gonna be hot from being… — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
Genocide is like a dessert. It is made of the flesh and bones of woman and children, it is sweetened with the… — Terry Brooks Copy Share Image
But housekeeping is fun. It is one job where you enjoy the results right along as you work. You may work all… — Gladys Taber Copy Share Image
We hear the same refrain all the time from people: I have no life. I get up in the morning, daycare, eldercare,… — Gerald Celente Copy Share Image
Every November, during the certain holiday people love so much, people take a dead turkey, open up the dead turkey’s ass, or… — Gary Yourofsky Copy Share Image
By the same token, frozen dinners, a microwave oven, a dishwasher, and an illegal immigrant hired to clean the house and take… — Robert Wuthnow Copy Share Image
All elongated objects, such as sticks, tree-trunks and umbrellas(the opening of these last being comparable to an erection) may stand for the… — Sigmund Freud Copy Share Image
The disgraced Usurer Yankel D took the baby girl home that evening... He made a bed of crumpled newspaper in a deep… — Jonathan Safran Foer Copy Share Image
Just because a chicken was born in the oven doesn't make it a biscuit. — Jesse Jackson Copy Share Image
If you throw a lamb chop in the oven, what's to keep it from getting done? — Joan Crawford Copy Share Image
