“Dear Pinterest, When we first started dating, you lured me in with Skittles-flavored vodka and Oreo-filled chocolate chip cookies. You wooed me with cheesy casseroles adjacent to motivational fitness sayings. I loved your inventiveness: Who knew cookies needed a sugary… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“Story time isn't much better. Imagine sitting in a circle with acquaintances, chanting spells and being drilled on a variety of subjects. "What sound… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“Reflection, and Loneliness. Awwww. I also call this stage the “My Chemical Romance Sea of Emo Sad.” You’re thinking about life before children, trying… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“Gloria lowered the book. “Are you allergic to gluten?” I shook my head. “Is this Emily person allergic to gluten?” I shook my head.… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“Just as quickly as it came, the wave of excitement turned bittersweet. It was all happening so fast. My baby was growing up. First teeth, then braces, then I'll turn around and she'll be filling out college applications. I can almost see he driving away in a car packed to the brim with boxes, off to start her life...away from… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share
“Some toddlers may take a bite or two of the meal you’ve made so lovingly, but most will not finish it. You’ll then feel compelled to eat the rest of their fish sticks or cheese cubes. Try not to dwell on the fact that you’re eating trash. Don’t worry, these calories don’t count. Most of you will spend your days… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share
“There's no way around it. Motherhood is hard. And you young moms put more pressure on yourselves than we ever did, with your crafts and your activities. Do you know what we called crafts when David was young? Chores. We didn't play with our kids, we sent them outside. All day. They'd only come back in when the streetlights came… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share
“It seems like once you're an adult, if you don't already have your friends picked out, you're screwed. Nobody makes new friends after twenty-seven.” — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“I really did need friends, but when you're a mom, that's easier said than done.” — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“It killed me that one of the hardest parts of being a mom was sometimes dealing with other moms. The judgments, the looks, the advice that feels like a slow plunging of a knife into an already sore spot. They were supposed to understand better than anyone. They were supposed to be the only people I didn't have to pretend… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share
“Lentils taste like wartime and look like destruction. They’re the perfect punishment for a traitor.” — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
“was on my fourth cup of coffee, so while my body felt dead, my mind was racing. I felt like a coked-out sloth. Can sloths do cocaine? It’s made from a jungle plant, right? What if sloths figured out the recipe and started making it? We’d have an epidemic of drug-addicted sloths. We’d have to change their name from sloths… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share
“What's Facebook? It's where moms like me post about how much we love the husbands who annoy the living bejesus out of us, and… — Bunmi Laditan Copy Share Image
