He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup. — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
It is criminal negligence to leave suckers lying around to tempt honest men. — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
Over in Hollywood they almost made a great picture, but they caught it just in time. — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest. — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
“if you copy from one author, it’s plagiarism, but if you copy from many, it’s research.” — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
It's getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner. — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .' — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
In order to excel, you must be completely dedicated to your chosen sport. You must also be prepared to work hard and be willing… — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep — Wilson Mizner Copy Share Image
