“Q: What's the best way to ensure that you'll always remember your wife's birthday? A: Forget it once.” — Various Copy Share Image
“My wife said that, for her birthday, she would like to go somewhere where she had not been for a long time.… — Various Copy Share Image
“There can be no disparity in marriage like unsuitability of mind and purpose’ -‘no disparity in marriage like unsuitability of mind and… — Various Copy Share Image
“So put on Jesus Christ this wedding garment; and, 1. He shall cover the shame of thy nakedness with the white linen… — Various Copy Share Image
“Marriage is lawful, merchandise is lawful, husbandry is lawful, but never one of these is lawful when they hinder thee from the… — Various Copy Share Image
“Q: Why is it that after they get married, a husband and wife are like two sides of a coin? A: Because… — Various Copy Share Image
“One evening, a wife drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How devoted… — Various Copy Share Image
“My wife complained the other day that our kitchen clock almost killed her mother. It fell seconds after where she had been… — Various Copy Share Image
“My wife has never really thought much of me. Just the other night she turned to me and said, "George, do you… — Various Copy Share Image
“The husband, on his deathbed, called over his wife and said, "One month after I die, I want you to marry Larry."… — Various Copy Share Image
“Wife: "Wake up, honey. Some thieves have broken into our house. I think they're eating the food I made last night." Husband:… — Various Copy Share Image
“logically speaking, you have a house." "Yes, I do have a house." "And because you have a house, I think that you… — Various Copy Share Image
“It was the funeral of a woman who had henpecked her husband, driven her kids half nuts, scrapped with the neighbors at… — Various Copy Share Image
“TV installer walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "You'll be served sometime between” — Various Copy Share
“Must the Earth forever be arranged like an ocean steamer, with large, luxurious rooms and luxurious food for a select few, and underneath in… — Various Copy Share
“God is worming out His and our adversaries, which He will do by little and little, till they be consumed. The covenant is seasonable.” — Various Copy Share
“it is no less since this same Confession of Faith was first subscribed and sworn to. And it has been still in use yearly… — Various Copy Share
“sees the Sights, under Perplexing Difficulties. The native borned Gothamite mite have notissed, a short time since, a venerable lookin' ex-Statesman,” — Various Copy Share
“What do you call a hundred blondes stacked on top of each other? An air mattress.” — Various Copy Share
“Thou wouldst never have chosen Him, if that loving and gracious God had not chosen thee.” — Various Copy Share
“Behold, and be awakened; behold, and be excited; behold, and be comforted; behold, and admire; behold, and wonder, that the King of heaven's Son… — Various Copy Share
“seal. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A bartender walks into a church, a temple and a mosque. He has no idea how jokes work. ♦◊♦◊♦◊♦ A baseball walks… — Various Copy Share
“I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I presume you… — Various Copy Share
Craig Jones: We ain't got no sugar. Smokey: No sugar? Damn. Y'all ain't never got two things that match. Either y'all got Kool-aid, no… — Various Copy Share
“I heard that if you play a Windows CD backwards, you'll get a satanic message. But the most frightening thing is that if you… — Various Copy Share
“holiness is a privilege, as well as a duty; it is a reward, a benefit to him who walks therein.” — Various Copy Share
“Music touches our hearts and moves our souls. Music has moods. Music can make us happy, relaxed or exhilarated. Music is sounds and voices… — Various Copy Share
