Your cable television is experiencing difficulties. Please do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations, as years of TV radiation have left your genitals withered and useless. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
Warning signs that lover is bored: 1. Passionless kisses 2. Frequent sighing 3. Moved, left no forwarding address. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
You just have to keep in mind that the important relationship is the relationship with the audience. That's what I try to do. Everything… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
Do my worst, eh? Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons." --Mr. Burns — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
I draw a weekly comic strip called Life in Hell, which is syndicated in about 250 newspapers. That's what I did before The Simpsons,… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
I was always frightened by taverns. They just seemed like very unpleasant places to go. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
There's always room out there for the hand-drawn image. I personally like the imperfection of hand drawing as opposed to the slick look of… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
People go into cartooning because they're shy and they're angry. That's when you're sitting in the back of a classroom drawing the teacher. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
Cartooning is for people who can't quite draw and can't quite write. You combine the two half-talents and come up with a career. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
On 'The Simpsons,' I will say that we definitely like to comment on what's going on in the world, and we try to be… — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
