“You know nothing. You’re nothing but a skank-ass, pencil-dick hemorrhoid. And you smell like anal leakage.” “Say what?” — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“His pager beeped, and he looked at the readout. “I have to get back to Deal. Do you have any secret weapons in your… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
You gonna take the case?" It's not a case. It's a missing person. Sort of." You're gonna have a devil of a time finding… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
Are we fighting?" I asked Morelli. "No. Were discussing." "Are you sure?" "Am I yelling?" Morelli asked. "Is my face purple? Are the cords… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
“changed expression. Wariness, maybe. I felt a body move so close it was skimming my own, and a warm hand protectively settled at the… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. "this is it", he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep."this car… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
“Ranger was waiting. He was dressed in black slacks, a form-fitting black T-shirt, and a black blazer.” — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
I guessed my mother figured if my father got right down to the task of eating he wouldn’t be so inclined to jump up… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out. — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
Way back before the 'Alex Barnaby' series was first published, we were talking with Dark Horse then about making it into a graphic novel… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
“He wears jeans, untucked shirts, and a Glock 19, and he has a big shaggy dog named Bob.” — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
I write to entertain. When people read one of my books I want them to finish with a smile on their faces, feeling a… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
“I hate shopping for clothes," Kate said. "I liked when I was in the military and all I needed was camouflage gear." "Shopping can… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
“I’m told there’s a paint specialist in Denver who does wonderful work,” Judy said. “I’ve started a GoFundMe page for Mr. Murphy.” “That’s a… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share
