I want to love somebody because I want to be loved. In a…
““I want to love somebody because I want to be loved. In a rabbit-fear I may hurl myself under the wheels of the car because the lights terrify me, and under the dark blind death of the wheels I will be safe. I am very tired, very banal, very confused. I do not know who I am tonight. I wanted to walk until I dropped and not complete the inevitable circle of coming home. I have lived in boxes above, below, and down the hall from girls who think hard, feel similarly, and long companionably, and I have not bothered to cultivate them because I did not want to, could not, sacrifice the time. People know who I am, and the harder I try to know who they are, the more I forget their names - I want to be alone, and yet there are times when the liquid eye and the cognizant grin of a small monkey would send me into a crying fit of brotherly love. I work and think alone. I live with people, and act. I love and cherish both. If I knew now what I wanted I would know when I saw it, who he was.””
About This Quote
This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.
The speaker expresses deep loneliness, yearning for love, and existential confusion, oscillating between desire for connection and self‑destructive thoughts.
In simple terms: Feeling isolated and conflicted about love and identity.
Key Takeaway
Seek authentic connections while caring for self‑health.
Themes
loneliness
identity
love
existential angst
Mood
melancholic
reflective
hopeful
Type
personal
philosophical
When to use this quote
- nighttime introspection
- therapy sessions
- creative writing
- support groups
- mindfulness practice
Key Concepts
psychology
self‑destruction
attachment theory
Questions to Reflect On
- What does love mean to you beyond being loved?
- How can you nurture self‑compassion amid confusion?
A Different Perspective
The intensity of despair may mask underlying resilience and capacity for growth.