You must give me leave to flatter myself, my dear cousin…
““You must give me leave to flatter myself, my dear cousin, that your refusal of my addresses is merely words of course. My reasons for believing it are briefly these: -- It does not appear to me that my hand is unworthy your acceptance, or that the establishment I can offer would be any other than highly desirable. My situation in life, my connections with the family of De Bourgh, and my relationship to your own, are circumstances highly in its favor; and you should take it into farther consideration that in spite of your manifold attractions, it is by no means certain that another offer of marriage may ever be made you. Your portion is unhappily so small that it will in all likelihood undo the effects of your loveliness and amiable qualifications. As I must therefore conclude that you are not serious in your rejection of me, I shall chuse to attribute it to your wish of increasing my love by suspense, according to the usual practice of elegant females. (Mr. Collins, after proposing to Elizabeth Bennet and being refused, in Pride and Prejudice.)””
About This Quote
This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.
Mr. Collins rationalizes his rejected marriage proposal, blaming Elizabeth's hesitation on strategic self‑flattery and social expectations.
In simple terms: He blames her refusal on his own tactics.
Key Takeaway
Self‑justification masks rejection.
Themes
courtship
social norms
rejection
Mood
ironic
reflective
Type
satire
character monologue
When to use this quote
- dating negotiations
- career promotion declines
Key Concepts
pride
self‑deception
Practical Applications
- communicate directly without rationalizing
- recognize personal agency
Questions to Reflect On
- How does self‑justification affect future relationships?
- What can be learned from honest feedback?
A Different Perspective
His logic ignores Elizabeth's genuine preferences and autonomy.