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I'm not good at having friends. I mean, I can make myself…

“I'm not good at having friends. I mean, I can make myself useful to people. I can fit in. I get invited to parties and I can sit at any table I want in the cafeteria. But actually trusting someone when they have nothing to gain from me just doesn't make sense. All friendships are negotiations of…” quote by Holly Black
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“I'm not good at having friends. I mean, I can make myself useful to people. I can fit in. I get invited to parties and I can sit at any table I want in the cafeteria. But actually trusting someone when they have nothing to gain from me just doesn't make sense. All friendships are negotiations of power.”

Holly Black

About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Friendships are seen as transactional, where trust is granted only when mutual benefit exists.

In simple terms: Friendships feel like negotiations.

Key Takeaway

Seek genuine connections beyond utility.

Themes

trust relationships power dynamics

Mood

skeptical thoughtful

Type

personal philosophical

When to use this quote

  • college cafeteria
  • workplace
  • online communities
  • social events

Key Concepts

social exchange theory psychology

Questions to Reflect On

  • What value do you bring to friendships?
  • Can you trust without expecting gain?
A Different Perspective

Not all friendships are purely transactional; emotions matter.

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