Charles Benedict

“Big Gay Purge.”

— Charles Benedict

“I finally left Ministry in mid-March 2009.”

— Charles Benedict

“Youth and skill are no match for experience and treachery.”

— Charles Benedict

“If God loves them why can’t he love me for being gay?”

— Charles Benedict

“Fortunately, I was not alone: I had my husband at my side.”

— Charles Benedict

“Someone really didn’t like people touching themselves.”

— Charles Benedict

“My son, the ex-priest who, by the way, is gay.”

— Charles Benedict

“All I knew is that I could not continue living a lie.”

— Charles Benedict

“I love you with all my heart. Dad”

— Charles Benedict

“I found the courage to admit I was gay. This is when I said the words in my head and said them…

— Charles Benedict

“When we reconnected, he was there to guide me as I navigated the uncharted waters of dating”

— Charles Benedict

“Reese was the first friend in my life whom I connected with emotionally and trusted.”

— Charles Benedict

“(Don’t confuse this with not being chaste; they would not have encouraged fornication.)”

— Charles Benedict

“God will not ask how well I followed the rules: he will ask how well I loved.”

— Charles Benedict

“Our bond of friendship strengthened over the year, and we became kindred spirits, even before we found love in each other.”

— Charles Benedict

“I discovered I was Lance’s first love—a joyous and dangerous reality—because we had not come to seminary to fall in love.”

— Charles Benedict

“I realized I needed to think about how to leave priesthood—if it was even possible.”

— Charles Benedict

“I was gay because I didn’t know if it would jeopardize my plans for priesthood and nobody wanted an out-of-the-closet gay priest…

— Charles Benedict

“Occasionally, formation staff would join us for these conversations. Since the media—and the Church at times—and the sensationalized public perception erroneously connected…

— Charles Benedict

“After all, I had a four-year bachelor’s degree and a five-year master’s degree—albeit in Divinity. I was well-educated and I could contribute…

— Charles Benedict

“Dominic told me that Sebastian had left priesthood after twelve years of active ministry and came out of the closet, just like…

— Charles Benedict

“It also excludes emotionally binding relationships with others, attachments to people or things that interfere with one’s ability to minister to others,…

— Charles Benedict

“I still need to innovate, to break out-of-the-box, and be a force of change, but I have not figured out how to…

— Charles Benedict

“When it seems the gods demand a sacrifice, patience and prudence always promote a well-thought stronger response over an in-the-moment reaction.”

— Charles Benedict

“Once again, I tried to change who I was because the emerging person deep within didn’t fit the expectations of the religious…

— Charles Benedict

“My husband grabbed my hand and held onto it as we walked down the aisle toward the exit and I did not…

— Charles Benedict

“Though it pains me to write this, I knew that if I wrote to the Holy Father and told him I was…

— Charles Benedict

“As he told me how his parents had raided his room, I could tell his heart was filled with agony and regret.…

— Charles Benedict

“Whenever I visited Sebastian and Ryan in Chicago, they took me to the gay-friendly Catholic church they attended. I fell in love…

— Charles Benedict

“First, the Catholic Church needs to pay more than lip service to the LGBTQ members of the faith. We are not to…

— Charles Benedict

“played the chameleon once again while trying to appease both sides. At the same time, as I came to know my sexuality…

— Charles Benedict

“My conservative group of friends, whom I trusted through Lance, strangely accepted that we were gay and deep in the closet and…

— Charles Benedict

“That’s when I finally quit. I don’t know if Lance quit, but I was done. The last thing I needed to do…

— Charles Benedict

“Clearly, my grandfather had paved the way for me.”

— Charles Benedict

“time and distance heals a broken heart.”

— Charles Benedict

“In hindsight, we were each other’s first boyfriend.”

— Charles Benedict

“Sebastian and Ryan took me to my first gay bars”

— Charles Benedict

“You can leave priesthood. You can be fired from priesthood.”

— Charles Benedict

“Who knew it was the Adderall XR messing with my head?”

— Charles Benedict

“I was constantly surrounded by people in love and I always went back to the rectory—and to bed—alone.”

— Charles Benedict