“Is it possible to be ticket for going too fast during speed dating?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“We started our journey across the waistlands by folowing the enormous belt!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If I climb poles at the North pole does that make me a polar poler?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Headstones: What I asked was, "Would you MARRY me?!!" "This time I'll count to one hundred and you hide." "OK, It's not… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If I were a candy bar I’d want to be a snicker, because then I’d have the last laugh!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I flunked out of mime school. I could never hear what the instructor was saying!!!” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I am open to all comments, I accept them with humility, or as much as i can muster on short notice.” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“When I was little and my mom got mad at me she would always say, "You know you can be replaced". I… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Sometimes I wake up and wonder if those chalk outlines they have at murder scenes get together for holiday parties...” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“If you sleep with one eye open are your dreams only half as good as everyone elses?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“What happens if you get scared half to death twice?? Who keeps track of those things?” — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Has anybody ever written a horror pop-up book? The center of the book pops up and opens the gate to the elder… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Asthmatic spewer of filth gasps, but clean air does not suffice To fuel fires fueled by thoughts got rotten Lest we all… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Well they have to have something to wean Caluntians off Venusian moles. Seems humans are the best therapy, to consume that is.… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“She cuts with daggerous eyes of fire Words like poison coat fangs of bad intent And biting remarks carve into holiday delights… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Neil Leckman I had a friend once that told me when we die and get to the pearly gates we are admitted… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“My grandson was sitting by a fire in the backyard and said it was getting smaller. I said he was getting bigger… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“New from Ronco, the Zomb-Matic adjustable dead. Choose how much of uncle Willy comes back to eat you!!! People like it when… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“It lies here deep in the heart, the small chest of pain Sharp words like daggers placed it here To fill with… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Thrice damned she howls like Cerberus to the night Guarding virtues that lie like forgotten stains On oaken floors that pave the… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I'll give you something to cry about!! Hell, no need to get up I’m doing a good job of bawling my eyes… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“People do not realize just how much effort it takes to do a half ass job properly. A lot of time is… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Tis oft I wonder, which way I should go At times the long road also reaches my goal The dangers are less,… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“I'm not sure if it's possible, but if it is I have a life contract with a rubber glove clause. This means… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“At a long meeting a man next to me, British I hope, said, "Man, I'd kill for a fag about now" I… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Remember children, once I am gone I will be part of it all Everything will be me and together be free The… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Sat in the Jacuzzi last night looking at the dark recesses of the nozzles. Remembering the story I wrote about spiders nesting… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Dale, a Plutonian Dreg Bug, the kind with seventeen eyes and a bad temper, got nailed in one of his eyes by… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“Sitting in front of my fireplace, basking in it's warm glow gives me time to reflect upon the sacrifices that it has… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
