I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you don't know what this means. It means go to heaven for happiness go to hell for anger. I hope you… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Death is to life as heaven is to hell they're both dependent on each other” — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“What a hell of a heaven it will be when they get all these hypocrites assembled there!” — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The first time the Deity came down to earth, he brought life and death; when he came the second time, he brought… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
God could create the world in six days because he didn't have to make it compatible with the previous version. Go to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters; the good to succeed, the bad to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Who are we to create a heaven and hell for ourselves, excluding animals and plants in the bargain, just because we have… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“He is in heaven now, and happy; or if not there, he bides in hell and is content; for in that place… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Well, my book is written-let it go. But if it were only to write over again there wouldn't be so many things… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A religion that comes of thought, and study, and deliberate conviction, sticks best. The revivalized convert who is scared in the direction… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is no God, no universe, no human race, no earthly life, no heaven, no hell. It is all a dream, a… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It is believed by everyone that when he was in heaven he was stern, hard, resentful, jealous and cruel, but that when… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Surely the test of a novel's characters is that you feel a strong interest in them and their affairs the good to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
This is a Christian country. Why, so is hell. Inasmuch as Strait is the way and narrow is the gate, and few… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There are no witches. The witch text remains; only the practice has changed. Hell fire is gone, but the text remains. Infant… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“A God who could make good children as easily a bad, yet preferred to make bad ones; who could have made every… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“All right, then, I'll go to hell' -and tore it up. It was awful thoughts, and awful words, but they was said.… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The Bible is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“There is one notable thing about our Christianity: bad, bloody, merciless, money-grabbing and predatory as it is -- in our country particularly,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Each place has its own advantages - heaven for the climate, and hell for the society.” — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Strange a God who mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness, then invented hell; who mouths morals to other people and has none Himself;… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is one notable thing about our Christianity: bad, bloody, merciless, money-grabbing and predatory as it is - in our country particularly,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“There is one notable thing about our Christianity: bad, bloody, merciless, money-grabbing, and predatory. The invention of hell measured by our Christianity… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share
If we could imagine such a man, that is a man who could invent the fly and send him out on his mission and… — Mark Twain Copy Share
You perceive, now, that these things are all impossible except in a dream. You perceive that they are pure and puerile insanities, the silly… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. — Mark Twain Copy Share
