--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I could feel Monika nudging me furiously…" description: "\"“I could feel Monika nudging me furiously at this point, but I refused to look at her. I wasn’t feeling particularly reverent about my mother’s deadnes..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/937/zo-heller-19571_atheism_i-could-feel-monika-nudging-me-furiously_1267347.jpg" --- # I could feel Monika nudging me furiously at this point… ![“I could feel Monika nudging me furiously at this point, but I refused to look at her. I wasn’t feeling particularly reverent about my mother’s deadness, or about the vicar, but I do despise that ghastly, ‘You’ve got to laugh, haven’t you?’ approach to religious occasions. As a young man, I often…” quote by Zoe Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/937/zo-heller-19571_atheism_i-could-feel-monika-nudging-me-furiously_1267347.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/937/zo-heller-19571_atheism_i-could-feel-monika-nudging-me-furiously_1267347.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/937/zo-heller-19571_atheism_i-could-feel-monika-nudging-me-furiously_1267347.jpg) > ““I could feel Monika nudging me furiously at this point, but I refused to look at her. I wasn’t feeling particularly reverent about my mother’s deadness, or about the vicar, but I do despise that ghastly, ‘You’ve got to laugh, haven’t you?’ approach to religious occasions. As a young man, I often goaded my believing friends with crudely logical questions about God. But as the years have passed, I have found myself hankering more and more for a little cosy voodoo in my life. Increasingly, I regard my atheism as a regrettable limitation. It seems to me that my lack of faith is not, as I once thought, a triumph of the rational mind, but rather, a failure of the imagination - an inability to tolerate mystery: a species, in fact, of neurosis. There is no chance of my being converted, of course - it is far too late for that. But I wish it wasn’t.”” [Zoe Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The author longs for comforting belief, seeing atheism as a creative limitation and a source of inner conflict. **In simple terms:** Faith offers comfort; lack of it feels like a loss. Key Takeaway Explore ways to embrace mystery without abandoning reason. Themes faith imagination existential doubt comfort neurosis Mood melancholic hopeful Type personal reflective When to use this quote - personal crisis - grief - religious gatherings - intellectual debates - creative writing Key Concepts existentialism psychology spirituality Questions to Reflect On - What does “cosy voodoo” represent for you? - Can mystery coexist with critical thought? A Different Perspective Faith may not resolve all issues and can clash with rational values. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Atheism](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/atheism/) [Faith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/faith/) [Lack of faith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/lack-of-faith/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Religion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/religion/) [Too late](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/too-late/) ## Related quotes > [It seems to me that my lack of faith is not, as I once thought, a triumph of the rational mind, but rather a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/it-seems-to-me-that-my-lack-of-faith-is-not-as-i-once-thought-a/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [The lack of faith is not doubt. It is certainty.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/the-lack-of-faith-is-not-doubt-it-is-certainty/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“In response to a letter regarding the writer's lack of religious belief: The lack of faith is not doubt. It is certainty.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/in-response-to-a-letter-regarding-the-writer-s-lack-of-religious/) [Abigail van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“Grief never ends … But it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donna-vanliere/grief-never-ends-but-it-changes-it-s-a-passage-not-a-place-to-stay/) [Donna VanLiere](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donna-vanliere/) > [“ Poor Nico di Angelo. The god's voice was tinged with disappointment. Do you know what you want, much less what I want? My…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-riordan/poor-nico-di-angelo-the-god-s-voice-was-tinged-with-disappointment-do/) [Rick Riordan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-riordan/) > [But the lack of faith could just as well be a crutch for non-believers, allowing them to live their lives without any concept of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-coren/but-the-lack-of-faith-could-just-as-well-be-a-crutch-for-non/) [Michael Coren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-coren/) > [“Worry has everything to do with lack of faith, and lack of faith has a lot to do with not believing in yourself as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/art-hochberg/worry-has-everything-to-do-with-lack-of-faith-and-lack-of-faith-has-a/) [Art Hochberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/art-hochberg/) > [Is it not lack of faith that leads men to fear the scrutiny of reason? If the destination is doubtful, then the path must…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donna-woolfolk-cross/is-it-not-lack-of-faith-that-leads-men-to-fear-the-scrutiny-of-reason/) [Donna Woolfolk Cross](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donna-woolfolk-cross/) > [It's the lack of faith that makes people afraid of meeting challenges, and I believe in myself. He who is not courageous enough to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/muhammad-ali/it-s-the-lack-of-faith-that-makes-people-afraid-of-meeting-challenges-2/) [Muhammad Ali](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/muhammad-ali/) > [Excuses are your lack of faith in your own power.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-anthony/excuses-are-your-lack-of-faith-in-your-own-power/) [Robert Anthony](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-anthony/) > [According to the teaching of our Lord, what is wrong with the world is precisely that it does not believe in God. Yet it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-baillie/according-to-the-teaching-of-our-lord-what-is-wrong-with-the-world-is/) [John Baillie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-baillie/) > [“Preachers who pride themselves on never giving a public invitation to be saved, never calling for a response of any kind, reveal not greater…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-macdonald/preachers-who-pride-themselves-on-never-giving-a-public-invitation-to/) [James MacDonald](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-macdonald/) > [Don't ever let family, friends or co-workers enforce their limited reality & lack of faith on you...Guard your ears.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/don-t-ever-let-family-friends-or-co-workers-enforce-their-limited/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The stress that some of us feel - it's a lack of faith, it really is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francis-chan/the-stress-that-some-of-us-feel-it-s-a-lack-of-faith-it-really-is/) [Francis Chan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francis-chan/) > [It's the lack of faith that makes people afraid of meeting challenges, and I believe in myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/azgraybebly-joslan/it-s-the-lack-of-faith-that-makes-people-afraid-of-meeting-challenges/) Azgraybebly Joslan ## More by Zoe Heller > [“All my life I have been the sort of person in whom people confide. And all my life I have been flattered by this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/all-my-life-i-have-been-the-sort-of-person-in-whom-people-confide-and/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [It's similar to the way you feel cuddling an infant or a kitten, when you want to squeeze it so hard you'd kill it...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/it-s-similar-to-the-way-you-feel-cuddling-an-infant-or-a-kitten-when/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [“Music, together with certain sorts of majestic landscape, had a well-known tendency to induce such faux-sublime moments: artificial intimations of transcendent truths, grandiose hunches…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/music-together-with-certain-sorts-of-majestic-landscape-had-a-well/) [Zoe Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [We are bound by the secrets we share.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/we-are-bound-by-the-secrets-we-share/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [“Being alone is not the most awful thing in the world. 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While Ford would certainly have agreed with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/the-conclusion-of-dowell-s-narrative-offers-not-a-resolution-so-much/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [“Sheba has often told me that she thinks there's a rhythm to married life, an ebb and flow in the pleasure that a couple…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/sheba-has-often-told-me-that-she-thinks-there-s-a-rhythm-to-married/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [“If this was cynical, then we must allow that all courtship is cynical.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/if-this-was-cynical-then-we-must-allow-that-all-courtship-is-cynical/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [“He had made a fairly unambiguous pass at her, as she was getting out of the cab. But event that had come to nothing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/he-had-made-a-fairly-unambiguous-pass-at-her-as-she-was-getting-out/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) > [It seems to me that my lack of faith is not, as I once thought, a triumph of the rational mind, but rather a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/zo-heller/it-seems-to-me-that-my-lack-of-faith-is-not-as-i-once-thought-a/) [Zoë Heller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) [Explore all 32 Zoe Heller quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/zo-heller/) ## More Atheism quotes > [From Augustine down, theologians have tried to compel people to accept their special interpretation of the Scripture, and the tortures of the inquisition, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matilda-joslyn-gage/from-augustine-down-theologians-have-tried-to-compel-people-to-accept/) [Matilda Joslyn Gage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matilda-joslyn-gage/) > [“What I have a problem with is not so much religion or god, but faith. When you say you believe something in your heart…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/penn-jillette/what-i-have-a-problem-with-is-not-so-much-religion-or-god-but-faith/) [Penn Jillette](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/penn-jillette/) > [Philosopher is a dictator who modifies accepted standards with his thoughts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ilkin-santak/philosopher-is-a-dictator-who-modifies-accepted-standards-with-his/) [Ilkin Santak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ilkin-santak/) > [No philosophy, no religion, has ever brought so glad a message to the world as this good news of Atheism.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/annie-besant/no-philosophy-no-religion-has-ever-brought-so-glad-a-message-to-the/) [Annie Besant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/annie-besant/) > [Let me tell you that atheism has never painted a masterpiece. Atheism has never dispelled fear. Atheism has never healed a disease; faith in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-hagee/let-me-tell-you-that-atheism-has-never-painted-a-masterpiece-atheism/) [John Hagee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-hagee/) > [Believing with you that religion is a matter which lies solely between man and his God, that he owes account to none other for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-jefferson/believing-with-you-that-religion-is-a-matter-which-lies-solely/) [Thomas Jefferson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-jefferson/) > [The inner defenses are unconscious. They consist of a kind of magic aura which the mind builds around cherished belief. Arguments which penetrate into…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-koestler/the-inner-defenses-are-unconscious-they-consist-of-a-kind-of-magic/) [Arthur Koestler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-koestler/) > [God speaks through me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/god-speaks-through-me/) [George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/) > [A knowledge of the existence of something we cannot penetrate, of the manifestations of the profoundest reason and the most radiant beauty - it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-einstein/a-knowledge-of-the-existence-of-something-we-cannot-penetrate-of-the/) [Albert Einstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-einstein/) > [You cannot ... transmute some incoherent mixture of words into sense merely by introducing the three-letter word "God" to be its grammatical subject.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antony-flew/you-cannot-transmute-some-incoherent-mixture-of-words-into-sense/) [Antony Flew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antony-flew/) > [Many humanists have argued that happiness involves a combination of hedonism and creative moral development; that an exuberant life fuses excellence and enjoyment, meaning…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paul-kurtz/many-humanists-have-argued-that-happiness-involves-a-combination-of/) [Paul Kurtz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paul-kurtz/) > [If, with all the time at my disposal, with all the wealth of the resources of this vast universe, to do with as I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-green-ingersoll/if-with-all-the-time-at-my-disposal-with-all-the-wealth-of-the/) [Robert Green Ingersoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-green-ingersoll/) > [Do you think that was kind? 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Clarke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-c-clarke/) > [Honest investigation is utterly impossible within the pale of any church, for the reason, that if you think the church is right you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-green-ingersoll/honest-investigation-is-utterly-impossible-within-the-pale-of-any/) [Robert Green Ingersoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-green-ingersoll/) [Browse all 4,769 Atheism quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/atheism/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I could feel Monika nudging me furiously at this point, but I refused to look at her. I wasn’t feeling particularly reverent about my mother’s deadness, or about the vicar, but I do despise that ghastly, ‘You’ve got to laugh, haven’t you?’ approach to religious occasions. As a young man, I often goaded my believing friends with crudely logical questions about God. But as the years have passed, I have found myself hankering more and more for a little cosy voodoo in my life. Increasingly, I regard my atheism as a regrettable limitation. It seems to me that my lack of faith is not, as I once thought, a triumph of the rational mind, but rather, a failure of the imagination - an inability to tolerate mystery: a species, in fact, of neurosis. There is no chance of my being converted, of course - it is far too late for that. 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