--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It…" description: "\"“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat…Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg" --- # Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting… ![“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat…Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone you…” quote by William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg) > ““Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat…Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone you certainly release them from judgment, but without true change, no real relationship can be established….Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a bridge of reconciliation….Forgiveness does not excuse anything….You may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred times the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less and each day after, until one day you will realize that you have forgiven completely. And then one day you will pray for his wholeness…”” [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Forgiveness separates letting go of resentment from trusting; it requires truth, repentance, and personal healing before genuine reconciliation can occur. **In simple terms:** Letting go isn’t trusting; it needs truth and change. Key Takeaway Release resentment, seek truth, allow healing. Themes forgiveness truth reconciliation healing trust Mood reflective hopeful serene Type advice philosophical spiritual When to use this quote - marriage conflict - family betrayal - workplace dispute - friendship fallout - personal trauma Key Concepts psychology ethics spirituality Questions to Reflect On - What truth must be spoken before you can truly forgive? - How does personal healing affect your ability to reconcile? A Different Perspective Forgiveness without change may enable false security and repeated harm. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Change](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/change/) [First Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/first-day/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Forgiveness Does](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness-does-404090/) [Forgiveness Way](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness-way-596963/) [Habits](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/habits/) [Real relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/real-relationship/) [Reconciliation Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reconciliation-forgiveness-1286094/) [Speak the truth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/speak-the-truth/) [Trust](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trust/) [Trust Forgive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trust-forgive-1433975/) ## Related quotes > [“Forgiveness in no way requires you to trust the one you forgive. It doesn't mean the relationship must be restored. p. 61”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roberta-fish/forgiveness-in-no-way-requires-you-to-trust-the-one-you-forgive-it/) [Roberta Fish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roberta-fish/) > [Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/forgiveness-in-no-way-requires-that-you-trust-the-one-you-forgive/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/forgiveness-does-not-create-a-relationship-unless-people-speak-the/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Reconciliation and forgiveness can actually help all of us move on in a healthier, happier way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chesa-boudin/reconciliation-and-forgiveness-can-actually-help-all-of-us-move-on-in/) [Chesa Boudin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chesa-boudin/) > [“People struggle to forgive mainly because they confuse forgiveness with reconciliation. Forgiveness is about unconditional self-healing to free ourselves from past pain, toxic grudges,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/avi-liran/people-struggle-to-forgive-mainly-because-they-confuse-forgiveness/) [Avi Liran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/avi-liran/) > [“Christ, too, will forgive, if only you attain to forgiving yourself...Oh, no, no, do not believe that I have spoken a blasphemy: even if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fyodor-dostoyevsky/christ-too-will-forgive-if-only-you-attain-to-forgiving-yourself-oh/) [Fyodor Dostoyevsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fyodor-dostoyevsky/) > [In the silence of the Cross, the uproar of weapons ceases and the language of reconciliation, forgiveness, dialogue and peace is spoken.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-francis/in-the-silence-of-the-cross-the-uproar-of-weapons-ceases-and-the/) [Pope Francis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-francis/) > [The Bible is clear about two principles: (1) We always need to forgive, but (2) we don’t always achieve reconciliation. Forgiveness is something that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-cloud/the-bible-is-clear-about-two-principles-1-we-always-need-to-forgive/) [Henry Cloud](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-cloud/) > [I've always very earnestly tried to do my best, so I just have to trust that and forgive myself for being fallible.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-danes/i-ve-always-very-earnestly-tried-to-do-my-best-so-i-just-have-to/) [Claire Danes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claire-danes/) > [Love the people you trust, forgive the people you hate, Â and you will find true inner peace...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aldo-acevedo/love-the-people-you-trust-forgive-the-people-you-hate-and-you-will/) [Aldo Acevedo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aldo-acevedo/) > [“In my eyes you're perfect, until you lie to me. Betraying my trust is something I can forgive, but never forget. Stay perfect.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/d-c-akers/in-my-eyes-you-re-perfect-until-you-lie-to-me-betraying-my-trust-is/) [D.C. Akers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/d-c-akers/) > [I forgive people, but that does NOT mean I trust them. I forgive them for ME, so I can let go and move on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-forgive-people-but-that-does-not-mean-i-trust-them-i-forgive-them/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I never hold back telling anyone that I love them. Especially someone I let into my heart and soul! Even when they have hurt…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-copeland/i-never-hold-back-telling-anyone-that-i-love-them-especially-someone/) [Rachel Copeland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-copeland/) > [So... that's my story. I had some pretty amazing friends, and I include in that group even though my whole life I blamed them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marley/so-that-s-my-story-i-had-some-pretty-amazing-friends-and-i-include-in/) [Marley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marley/) > [God dealt with our whole situation on the cross; there is nothing left for you to settle. Just say to Him, 'Lord, I cannot…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/corrie-ten-boom/god-dealt-with-our-whole-situation-on-the-cross-there-is-nothing-left/) [Corrie Ten Boom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/corrie-ten-boom/) ## More by William P. Young > [I don't want my kids growing up with the image of God that I had -- Plato's white grandfatherly god -- because that god…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/i-don-t-want-my-kids-growing-up-with-the-image-of-god-that-i-had/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Because you continue to inhabit and believe your metaphors, you cannot see what is true.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/because-you-continue-to-inhabit-and-believe-your-metaphors-you-cannot/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [“Religion must use law to empower itself and control the people who they need in order to survive.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/religion-must-use-law-to-empower-itself-and-control-the-people-who/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Once you have hierarchy you need rules to protect and administer it, and then you need law and the enforcement of the rules, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/once-you-have-hierarchy-you-need-rules-to-protect-and-administer-it/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [“(Jesus speaking) "An awful lot of what is done in my name has nothing to do with me and is often, even if unintentional,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/jesus-speaking-an-awful-lot-of-what-is-done-in-my-name-has-nothing-to/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [This life is only the anteroom of a greater reality to come.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/this-life-is-only-the-anteroom-of-a-greater-reality-to-come/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [I often find that getting head issues out of the way first makes the heart stuff easier to work on later.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/i-often-find-that-getting-head-issues-out-of-the-way-first-makes-the/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [For me, everything is about Jesus and Father and the Holy Spirit, and relationships, and life is an adventure of faith lived one day…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/for-me-everything-is-about-jesus-and-father-and-the-holy-spirit-and/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Relationships are never about power, and one way to avoid the will to hold power over another is to chose to limit to onself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/relationships-are-never-about-power-and-one-way-to-avoid-the-will-to/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [It is my desire and intent to trust the multi-layered good purposes of God than in what humans fabricate out of their need and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/it-is-my-desire-and-intent-to-trust-the-multi-layered-good-purposes/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Jesus was always challenging the dogma of religion. So, you know, it's not like I'm out there by myself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/jesus-was-always-challenging-the-dogma-of-religion-so-you-know-it-s/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [If anything matters, then everything matters.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/if-anything-matters-then-everything-matters/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [I don't just want a piece of you and a piece of your life. Even if you were able, which you are not, to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/i-don-t-just-want-a-piece-of-you-and-a-piece-of-your-life-even-if-you/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Trust is the fruit of a relationship in which you know you are loved.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/trust-is-the-fruit-of-a-relationship-in-which-you-know-you-are-loved/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) > [Something in the heart of most human beings simply cannot abide pain inflicted on the innocent, especially children. Even broken men serving in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/something-in-the-heart-of-most-human-beings-simply-cannot-abide-pain/) [William P. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) [Explore all 138 William P. Young quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/) ## More Change quotes > [Only within yourself exists the other reality for which you long. I can give you nothing that has not already its being within yourself.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hermann-hesse/only-within-yourself-exists-the-other-reality-for-which-you-long-i/) [Hermann Hesse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hermann-hesse/) > [Life is full of change. That's how we learn and grow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/life-is-full-of-change-that-s-how-we-learn-and-grow/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I can't believe that I'm sitting in meetings with Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks, and Annette Bening. I want to take on that responsibility to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roger-ross-williams/i-can-t-believe-that-i-m-sitting-in-meetings-with-steven-spielberg/) [Roger Ross Williams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roger-ross-williams/) > [“…progress isn't necessarily about change but about things turning out as we want them to”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phil-hogan/progress-isn-t-necessarily-about-change-but-about-things-turning-out/) [Phil Hogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phil-hogan/) > [Nobody can tell me that no changes are necessary in Washington.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-weld/nobody-can-tell-me-that-no-changes-are-necessary-in-washington/) [William Weld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-weld/) > [If my campaign is not in the debate, we will not be talking about how we really fix this problem of endless and expanding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-stein/if-my-campaign-is-not-in-the-debate-we-will-not-be-talking-about-how/) [Jill Stein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-stein/) > [When you walk down the street of Kabul your values for life changes, they do change.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marco-pierre-white/when-you-walk-down-the-street-of-kabul-your-values-for-life-changes/) [Marco Pierre White](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marco-pierre-white/) > [Your world will change whether or not you choose to change, but you have the power to choose it's direction.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/napoleon-hill/your-world-will-change-whether-or-not-you-choose-to-change-but-you/) [Napoleon Hill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/napoleon-hill/) > [I hope I continue to evolve.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlotte-flair/i-hope-i-continue-to-evolve/) [Charlotte Flair](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlotte-flair/) > [“Stay focused on bringing people together and more on positive messaging so that you can be the change you wish to see in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/germany-kent/stay-focused-on-bringing-people-together-and-more-on-positive/) [Germany Kent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/germany-kent/) > [The biggest change for me as a mom was realizing I needed to put someone else before me. Now the hardest part about the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kim-alexis/the-biggest-change-for-me-as-a-mom-was-realizing-i-needed-to-put/) [Kim Alexis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kim-alexis/) > [“After the funeral, my life changed. I felt as if time were suddenly precious, water going down an open drain, and I could not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-albom/after-the-funeral-my-life-changed-i-felt-as-if-time-were-suddenly/) [Mitch Albom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-albom/) > [You practice mindfulness, on the one hand, to be calm and peaceful. On the other hand, as you practice mindfulness and live a life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-practice-mindfulness-on-the-one-hand-to-be-calm-and-peaceful-on/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Irish research will contribute to global progress and have the potential to help all countries realise the potential of their land sectors in addressing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/enda-kenny/irish-research-will-contribute-to-global-progress-and-have-the/) [Enda Kenny](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/enda-kenny/) > [No man can change himself into anything from sheer reason; he can only change into what he potentially is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-jung/no-man-can-change-himself-into-anything-from-sheer-reason-he-can-only/) [Carl Jung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-jung/) [Browse all 33,920 Change quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/change/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat…Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone you certainly release them from judgment, but without true change, no real relationship can be established….Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a bridge of reconciliation….Forgiveness does not excuse anything….You may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred times the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less and each day after, until one day you will realize that you have forgiven completely. And then one day you will pray for his wholeness…”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "William P. Young" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-is-about-letting-go-of-another-3/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Change" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-is-about-letting-go-of-another-3/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90e/william-p-young-3038_change_forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-i_2645822.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat…Forgiveness does not…” — William P. Young", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "William P. Young", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-p-young/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-is-about-letting-go-of-another-3/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-p-young/forgiveness-is-not-about-forgetting-it-is-about-letting-go-of-another-3/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```