--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as…" description: "\"Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as that? Do we respond only to people who seem to find us interesting?... Do we all buzz or ring or ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg" --- # Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as… ![“Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as that? Do we respond only to people who seem to find us interesting?... Do we all buzz or ring or light up when people press our vanity buttons, and only then? Can I think of anyone in my whole life whom I have liked without his first showing…” quote by Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg) > “Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as that? Do we respond only to people who seem to find us interesting?... Do we all buzz or ring or light up when people press our vanity buttons, and only then? Can I think of anyone in my whole life whom I have liked without his first showing signs of liking me?” [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Friendship often feels conditional, based on mutual interest and vanity, questioning genuine connection. **In simple terms:** Friendship can feel based on mutual. Key Takeaway .Seek authentic connections. Themes friendship vanity authenticity social dynamics psychology Mood thoughtful introspective Type philosophical observational When to use this quote - social media interaction - dating - long‑term friendships Key Concepts self‑esteem interpersonal bonds Questions to Reflect On - What defines a genuine friendship? - How can we move beyond vanity? A Different Perspective May overlook true bonds. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Bases](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bases/) [Basis Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/basis-friendship-477973/) [Buttons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/buttons/) [Buzz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/buzz/) [Firsts](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/firsts/) [Friendship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship/) [Friendship Reactive](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friendship-reactive-4042084/) [Interesting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/interesting/) [Light](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/light/) [Liking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/liking/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [Rings](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rings/) [Signs Liking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/signs-liking-4042085/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) [Vanity](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/vanity/) [Whole life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/whole-life/) ## Related quotes > [“Women made such swell friends. Awfully swell. In the first place, you had to be in love with a woman to have a basis…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ernest-hemingway/women-made-such-swell-friends-awfully-swell-in-the-first-place-you/) [Ernest Hemingway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ernest-hemingway/) > [I see love developing from friendship. Common ground is a strong basis for friendship. My husband is my best friend and we have a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/i-see-love-developing-from-friendship-common-ground-is-a-strong-basis/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [Love is the basis of our friendship as it is of religion.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mahatma-gandhi/love-is-the-basis-of-our-friendship-as-it-is-of-religion/) [Mahatma Gandhi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mahatma-gandhi/) > [“It is not possible to be intimate with nore than very few, because there are only very few in the world with whom we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-merton/it-is-not-possible-to-be-intimate-with-nore-than-very-few-because/) [Thomas Merton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-merton/) > [“The basis of friendship is sharing.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-arthur/the-basis-of-friendship-is-sharing/) [John Arthur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-arthur/) > [“I believe with all my heart that it’s only after working side by side with another person that you earn the right to speak…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chip-gaines/i-believe-with-all-my-heart-that-it-s-only-after-working-side-by-side/) [Chip Gaines](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chip-gaines/) > [When I finally gathered, invented, stole, simplified, borrowed, and found a publisher for a clutch of reasonably foolproof recipes, I learned I had friends…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peg-bracken/when-i-finally-gathered-invented-stole-simplified-borrowed-and-found/) [Peg Bracken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peg-bracken/) > [There's a buzz to failing and not dying.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-colbert/there-s-a-buzz-to-failing-and-not-dying/) [Stephen Colbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-colbert/) > [It's not like I think: 'By the age of 40 I've got to be an international household name.' When the opportunity to perform comes…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-merchant/it-s-not-like-i-think-by-the-age-of-40-i-ve-got-to-be-an/) [Stephen Merchant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-merchant/) > [One of the things that drives me is the excitement that I could fail. What better buzz can you get?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/calvin-ayre/one-of-the-things-that-drives-me-is-the-excitement-that-i-could-fail/) [Calvin Ayre](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/calvin-ayre/) > [Heaven above was blue, and earth beneath was green; the river glistened like a path of diamonds in the sun; the birds poured forth…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-dickens/heaven-above-was-blue-and-earth-beneath-was-green-the-river-glistened/) [Charles Dickens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-dickens/) > [Nobody can become a drug addict if they're hip. Because it's obvious that if you're hip then you've got to make it. The buzz…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-harrison/nobody-can-become-a-drug-addict-if-they-re-hip-because-it-s-obvious/) [George Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-harrison/) > [Visiting any shop for the first time is exciting. There's always that buzz as you push open the door; that hope; that belief -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sophie-kinsella/visiting-any-shop-for-the-first-time-is-exciting-there-s-always-that/) [Sophie Kinsella](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sophie-kinsella/) > [I mean, the competition is really created by the buzz around the Emmys. It's a totally subjective thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-c-hall/i-mean-the-competition-is-really-created-by-the-buzz-around-the-emmys/) [Michael C. Hall](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-c-hall/) > [ No wonder that Churchill described this effort \[the British codebreakers working at Bletchley Park\] as "Britian"s secret weapon," a weapon far more effective than… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-hilton/no-wonder-that-churchill-described-this-effort-the-british/) [Peter Hilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-hilton/) ## More by Wallace Stegner > [“I have to blame myself for not finding any way of reaching him, but I can't feel that either Ruth or I had anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/i-have-to-blame-myself-for-not-finding-any-way-of-reaching-him-but-i/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [No life goes past so swiftly as an eventless one, no clock spins like a clock whose days are all alike.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/no-life-goes-past-so-swiftly-as-an-eventless-one-no-clock-spins-like/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [“within yourself, you became a grave for her as you were a grave for Chet, and you carried your dead unquietly within you. —”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/within-yourself-you-became-a-grave-for-her-as-you-were-a-grave-for/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Towns are like people. Old ones often have character, the new ones are interchangeable.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/towns-are-like-people-old-ones-often-have-character-the-new-ones-are/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [By his very profession, a serious fiction writer is a vendor of the sensuous particulars of life, a perceiver and handler of things. His…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/by-his-very-profession-a-serious-fiction-writer-is-a-vendor-of-the/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [“The creative writer is compulsively concrete . . . . His fictional house should be haunted by ideas, not inhabited by them; they should…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/the-creative-writer-is-compulsively-concrete-his-fictional-house/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Hard writing makes easy reading.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/hard-writing-makes-easy-reading/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [You married me...but you didn't marry what you could make out of me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/you-married-me-but-you-didn-t-marry-what-you-could-make-out-of-me/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Wisdom. . .is knowing what you have to accept.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/wisdom-is-knowing-what-you-have-to-accept/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [“His mouth is full of ecology, his mind is full of fumes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/his-mouth-is-full-of-ecology-his-mind-is-full-of-fumes/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [I gave my heart to the mountains the minute I stood beside this river with its spray in my face and watched it thunder…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/i-gave-my-heart-to-the-mountains-the-minute-i-stood-beside-this-river/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [“Poetry ought to be a by-product of living, and you can't have a by-product unless you've got a product first .”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/poetry-ought-to-be-a-by-product-of-living-and-you-can-t-have-a-by/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Something will have gone out of us as a people if we ever let the remaining wilderness be destroyed; if we permit the last…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/something-will-have-gone-out-of-us-as-a-people-if-we-ever-let-the/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [“Some people, I am told, have memories like computers, nothing to do but punch the button and wait for the print-out. Mine is more…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/some-people-i-am-told-have-memories-like-computers-nothing-to-do-but/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [ “\[Y\]ou were too alert to the figurative possibilities of words not to see the phrase \[angle of repose\] as descriptive of human as well… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/y-ou-were-too-alert-to-the-figurative-possibilities-of-words-not-to/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) [Explore all 251 Wallace Stegner quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) ## More Bases quotes > [Self-respect and a clear conscience are powerful components of integrity and are the basis for enriching your relationships with others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/denis-waitley/self-respect-and-a-clear-conscience-are-powerful-components-of/) [Denis Waitley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/denis-waitley/) > [If my campaign is not in the debate, we will not be talking about how we really fix this problem of endless and expanding…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-stein/if-my-campaign-is-not-in-the-debate-we-will-not-be-talking-about-how/) [Jill Stein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-stein/) > [I don't want to go into space because of war. I think we would if it was triggered. If China said they want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-degrasse-tyson/i-don-t-want-to-go-into-space-because-of-war-i-think-we-would-if-it/) [Neil deGrasse Tyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-degrasse-tyson/) > [The United States cannot and should not discriminate on the basis of religion. The free exercise of religion is at the very heart of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-pence/the-united-states-cannot-and-should-not-discriminate-on-the-basis-of/) [Mike Pence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-pence/) > [According to the best research, less than 3% of Americans have written goals, and less than 1% review and rewrite their goals on a daily basis.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-tracy/according-to-the-best-research-less-than-3-of-americans-have-written/) [Brian Tracy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-tracy/) > [When the Lord Jesus Christ became my surety . . . He went to Calvary's cross, and all my guilt was charged against Him.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-allen-ironside/when-the-lord-jesus-christ-became-my-surety-he-went-to-calvary-s/) [Henry Allen Ironside](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-allen-ironside/) > [I'm in a business where there's complete anarchy. You can't control it - you can only react to it. The control that people traditionally…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-sorrell/i-m-in-a-business-where-there-s-complete-anarchy-you-can-t-control-it/) [Martin Sorrell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-sorrell/) > [This tendency to avoid problems and the emotional suffering inherent in them is the primary basis of all human mental illness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-r-swindoll/this-tendency-to-avoid-problems-and-the-emotional-suffering-inherent/) [Charles R. Swindoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-r-swindoll/) > [There are dangers in consensus: it could be an attempt to satisfy people holding no particular views about anything. ... No great party can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-thatcher/there-are-dangers-in-consensus-it-could-be-an-attempt-to-satisfy/) [Margaret Thatcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-thatcher/) > [There's no way to have a peace agreement unless the mediator or negotiator looks at both sides from an equal basis.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-carter/there-s-no-way-to-have-a-peace-agreement-unless-the-mediator-or/) [Jimmy Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-carter/) > [Coercion is the basis of every law in the universe,--human or divine. A law is not law without coercion behind it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-a-garfield/coercion-is-the-basis-of-every-law-in-the-universe-human-or-divine-a/) [James A. Garfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-a-garfield/) > [Each Act of Parliament intended to address harassment and discrimination has faced objections on the basis of 'you'll never be able to prove...' and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-field/each-act-of-parliament-intended-to-address-harassment-and/) [Tim Field](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-field/) > [If you want good behavior, don't pay on a commission basis. Our judges aren't paid so much a case. We keep them pretty well…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charlie-munger/if-you-want-good-behavior-don-t-pay-on-a-commission-basis-our-judges/) [Charlie Munger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charlie-munger/) > [My favorite thing about being a mom is just what a better person it makes you on a daily basis,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/drew-barrymore/my-favorite-thing-about-being-a-mom-is-just-what-a-better-person-it/) [Drew Barrymore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/drew-barrymore/) > [We have committed ourselves to pursue joint policies, but then national governments say, "We aren't bound by that." That is a dramatic situation, because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/martin-schulz/we-have-committed-ourselves-to-pursue-joint-policies-but-then/) [Martin Schulz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/martin-schulz/) [Browse all 2,701 Bases quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bases/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as that? Do we respond only to people who seem to find us interesting?... Do we all buzz or ring or light up when people press our vanity buttons, and only then? Can I think of anyone in my whole life whom I have liked without his first showing signs of liking me?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Wallace Stegner" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as-reactive-as-that-do-we/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Bases" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as-reactive-as-that-do-we/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/81d/wallace-stegner-1352_bases_is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as_2888415.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Is that the basis of friendship? Is it as reactive as that? Do we respond only to people who seem to find us…” — Wallace Stegner", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Wallace Stegner", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Is that the basis of friendship?...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as-reactive-as-that-do-we/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/is-that-the-basis-of-friendship-is-it-as-reactive-as-that-do-we/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```