---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Before I came out, people always asked me…"
description: "\"Before I came out, people always asked me math questions. But once I became a woman, they stopped. There's unintended discrimination.\" — Vivienne Ming"
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg"
---

#  Before I came out, people always asked me math questions…

![“Before I came out, people always asked me math questions. But once I became a woman, they stopped. There's unintended discrimination.” quote by Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg)

> “Before I came out, people always asked me math questions. But once I became a woman, they stopped. There's unintended discrimination.”

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

After transitioning, people stopped asking math questions, revealing subtle bias that assumes women lack technical expertise.

**In simple terms:** Gender bias leads to reduced expectations of women’s abilities.

Key Takeaway

Address and correct unconscious gender biases in professional settings.

Themes

bias gender STEM inclusion

Mood

inquisitive determined

Type

social professional

When to use this quote

- workplace training
- STEM mentorship
- policy development
- diversity audits

Key Concepts

social psychology implicit bias gender dynamics

Questions to Reflect On

- How do biases affect career trajectories?
- What policies can reduce gendered assumptions?

A Different Perspective

Changing attitudes requires systemic effort beyond individual awareness.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Asked Math](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/asked-math-1387001/) [Discrimination](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discrimination/) [Mathematics](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mathematics/) [People](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people/) [People Asked](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/people-asked/) [Questions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/questions/) [Questions Woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/questions-woman-1330828/) [Unintended Discrimination](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/unintended-discrimination-1387000/) [Woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/woman/)

## Related quotes

> [“Am I really going to hell for being gay?” Or, “I think I was born a woman in a man’s body. Does that make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-benedict/am-i-really-going-to-hell-for-being-gay-or-i-think-i-was-born-a-woman/)

[Charles Benedict](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-benedict/)

> [“There are three questions every woman should be able to answer yes to before they commit to a man. If you answer no to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/there-are-three-questions-every-woman-should-be-able-to-answer-yes-to-4/)

[Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/)

> [“There are three questions every woman should be able to answer yes to before they commit to a man. If you answer no to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/there-are-three-questions-every-woman-should-be-able-to-answer-yes-to-3/)

[Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/)

> [I still ask myself the same questions every woman asks. Was it my fault? Did I say or do something to make him feel…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-chang/i-still-ask-myself-the-same-questions-every-woman-asks-was-it-my/)

[Emily Chang](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-chang/)

> [You're raised to think being a mother is an inevitable step in your development but you start to ask yourself questions, because not every…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lena-dunham/you-re-raised-to-think-being-a-mother-is-an-inevitable-step-in-your/)

[Lena Dunham](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lena-dunham/)

> [“There are three questions every woman should be able to answer yes to before they commit to a man: 1. Does he treat you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/there-are-three-questions-every-woman-should-be-able-to-answer-yes-to-2/)

[Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/)

> [“There are three questions every woman should be able to answer yes to before she commits to a man. If you answer no to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/there-are-three-questions-every-woman-should-be-able-to-answer-yes-to/)

[Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/)

> [If you were on a sinking ship and yelled, Women and children first! how much feminist opposition do you think you'd get? . .…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/if-you-were-on-a-sinking-ship-and-yelled-women-and-children-first-how/)

[Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/)

> [“Why can't you be decent to people?" she asked. "Fear," I said.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/why-can-t-you-be-decent-to-people-she-asked-fear-i-said/)

[Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/)

> [In the Senate race I went for some candidate endorsement meetings and three people there asked me: Do you go to a therapist? Because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/angela-alioto/in-the-senate-race-i-went-for-some-candidate-endorsement-meetings-and/)

[Angela Alioto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/angela-alioto/)

> [No one hid their interest when I walked into the room. I'm not sure if it was the news about Boo or my general…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maureen-johnson/no-one-hid-their-interest-when-i-walked-into-the-room-i-m-not-sure-if/)

[Maureen Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maureen-johnson/)

> [ \[People asked me\] "Where is your million-dollar shirt?" I'm like, "It's underneath these $25 Hanes T-shirts I've got on." ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-r-smith/people-asked-me-where-is-your-million-dollar-shirt-i-m-like-it-s/)

[J. R. Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-r-smith/)

> [People have asked me about adoption, and yes, I would. I don't feel you have to have your own children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jo-frost/people-have-asked-me-about-adoption-and-yes-i-would-i-don-t-feel-you/)

[Jo Frost](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jo-frost/)

> [“I've never ever missed anyone in my life. I genuinely do not understand the emotion. People have told me they missed me a thousand…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/caspar-vega/i-ve-never-ever-missed-anyone-in-my-life-i-genuinely-do-not/)

[Caspar Vega](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/caspar-vega/)

> [“Was James bipolar?” The tears returned, and I watched her battle them. “We don’t use that word in our family.” I stared at her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hazel-butler/was-james-bipolar-the-tears-returned-and-i-watched-her-battle-them-we/)

[Hazel Butler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hazel-butler/)

## More by Vivienne Ming

> [AI might be a powerful technology, but things won't get better simply by adding AI.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/ai-might-be-a-powerful-technology-but-things-won-t-get-better-simply/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [In 1958, my father graduated from secondary school as the highest-achieving student in the state of Kansas, earning a five-year scholarship to the Massachusetts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/in-1958-my-father-graduated-from-secondary-school-as-the-highest/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [After I transitioned, a lot of people said, 'I like you so much more now,' because before, I was unhappy. Making that change was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/after-i-transitioned-a-lot-of-people-said-i-like-you-so-much-more-now/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [My body became aligned with my identity, and it was profound.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/my-body-became-aligned-with-my-identity-and-it-was-profound/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [I want to literally make people smarter by jamming things in their brains.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/i-want-to-literally-make-people-smarter-by-jamming-things-in-their/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [Who wants to get a worse diagnosis of their cancer, just to keep a human doctor in the job?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/who-wants-to-get-a-worse-diagnosis-of-their-cancer-just-to-keep-a/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [If a hero is a person on which you've made an explicit choice model yourself, mine is my father for showing me how to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/if-a-hero-is-a-person-on-which-you-ve-made-an-explicit-choice-model/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [If my son came to me years from now and told me, 'I'm gay,' I'd say, 'That's wonderful. I'm so glad you know who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/if-my-son-came-to-me-years-from-now-and-told-me-i-m-gay-i-d-say-that/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [Because of the tax on being different, individual actors in the labour market from different backgrounds can rationally value the same opportunities differently.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/because-of-the-tax-on-being-different-individual-actors-in-the-labour/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [If you tell someone, 'Hey, your daughter is going to win a Nobel Prize someday,' it makes it less likely. If you say, 'Your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/if-you-tell-someone-hey-your-daughter-is-going-to-win-a-nobel-prize/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [Passing on a full scholarship to MIT would be irrational for me, but to my father and his parents, what would have been the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/passing-on-a-full-scholarship-to-mit-would-be-irrational-for-me-but/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [If you have a diverse workforce, then you have a much better chance of picking up on things that a lack of diversity would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/if-you-have-a-diverse-workforce-then-you-have-a-much-better-chance-of/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [Estrogen's a wonderful thing. I'd be doing the dishes and suddenly be like, 'Wait a minute - why am I crying?'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/estrogen-s-a-wonderful-thing-i-d-be-doing-the-dishes-and-suddenly-be/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [Why did I go back to school? After working with giant snails as the manager of an abalone farm, who wouldn't be fascinated with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/why-did-i-go-back-to-school-after-working-with-giant-snails-as-the/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

> [I have had a small handful of truly blatantly discriminatory experiences for being transgender, but the vast majority are simply the differences between being…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/i-have-had-a-small-handful-of-truly-blatantly-discriminatory/)

[Vivienne Ming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

[Explore all 31 Vivienne Ming quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/)

## More Discrimination quotes

> [There could be no more powerful argument against mixing religion and government than the success of independent African American churches in placing racial segregation…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-jacoby/there-could-be-no-more-powerful-argument-against-mixing-religion-and/)

[Susan Jacoby](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-jacoby/)

> [Jesus never said a word about homosexuality. In all of his teachings about multiple things - he never said that gay people should be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jimmy-carter/jesus-never-said-a-word-about-homosexuality-in-all-of-his-teachings/)

[Jimmy Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jimmy-carter/)

> [In a general way, the literature of the twentieth century is essentially psychological; and psychology consists of describing states of the soul by displaying…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/simone-weil/in-a-general-way-the-literature-of-the-twentieth-century-is/)

[Simone Weil](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/simone-weil/)

> [“Mental illness is not something you misunderstand in this era. Get educated because bias is no different than racism.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-l-alder/mental-illness-is-not-something-you-misunderstand-in-this-era-get/)

[Shannon L. Alder](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-l-alder/)

> [I believe that those who promote discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or any other grounds are gravely mistaken about the values that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-clinton/i-believe-that-those-who-promote-discrimination-on-the-basis-of/)

[Bill Clinton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-clinton/)

> [Each Act of Parliament intended to address harassment and discrimination has faced objections on the basis of 'you'll never be able to prove...' and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-field/each-act-of-parliament-intended-to-address-harassment-and/)

[Tim Field](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-field/)

> [Nothing better protects a human being against the stupidity of prejudice, racism, religious or political sectarianism, and exclusivist nationalism than this truth that invariably…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mario-vargas-llosa/nothing-better-protects-a-human-being-against-the-stupidity-of/)

[Mario Vargas Llosa](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mario-vargas-llosa/)

> [It is obvious that discrimination exists. Women do not have the opportunities that men do. And women that do not conform to the system,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-chisholm/it-is-obvious-that-discrimination-exists-women-do-not-have-the/)

[Shirley Chisholm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-chisholm/)

> [The fact is that in too many parts of our country, we still have discrimination. And affirmative action is not just something that applies…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-f-kerry/the-fact-is-that-in-too-many-parts-of-our-country-we-still-have/)

[John F. Kerry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-f-kerry/)

> [Judging someone by the color of their skin is ignorant. Their skin complexion has nothing to do with their morals, beliefs or intelligence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/judging-someone-by-the-color-of-their-skin-is-ignorant-their-skin/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [We try to take a very strong stance against discrimination and hatred.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathan-blecharczyk/we-try-to-take-a-very-strong-stance-against-discrimination-and-hatred/)

[Nathan Blecharczyk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathan-blecharczyk/)

> [I resolutely believe that respect for diversity is a fundamental pillar in the eradication of racism, xenophobia and intolerance. There is no excuse for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rigoberta-menchu/i-resolutely-believe-that-respect-for-diversity-is-a-fundamental/)

[Rigoberta Menchu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rigoberta-menchu/)

> [End discrimination and hate everyone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/candy/end-discrimination-and-hate-everyone/)

[Candy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/candy/)

> [This bill would allow an employee to bring a claim against an employer decades after the alleged initial act of discrimination occurred. Trial lawyers,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/buck-mckeon/this-bill-would-allow-an-employee-to-bring-a-claim-against-an/)

[Buck McKeon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/buck-mckeon/)

> [Legal discrimination between the sexes is, in almost every instance, founded on outmoded views of society and the pre-scientific beliefs about psychology and physiology.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-chisholm/legal-discrimination-between-the-sexes-is-in-almost-every-instance/)

[Shirley Chisholm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-chisholm/)

[Browse all 1,366 Discrimination quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/discrimination/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "Before I came out, people always asked me math questions. But once I became a woman, they stopped. There's unintended discrimination.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Vivienne Ming"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me-math-questions-but-once-i/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Discrimination"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me-math-questions-but-once-i/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d76/vivienne-ming-20330_discrimination_before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me_1726257.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Before I came out, people always asked me math questions. But once I became a woman, they stopped. There's…” — Vivienne Ming",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Vivienne Ming",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vivienne-ming/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Before I came out, people always...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me-math-questions-but-once-i/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vivienne-ming/before-i-came-out-people-always-asked-me-math-questions-but-once-i/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
