--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You think my first instinct is to protect…" description: "\"“You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong.\" He leans his face close to mine and wra..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg" --- # You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because… ![“You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong." He leans his face close to mine and wraps his fingers around my chin. His hand smells like metal. When was the last time he held a gun, or a knife? My skin tingles at the point of…” quote by Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg) > ““You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong." He leans his face close to mine and wraps his fingers around my chin. His hand smells like metal. When was the last time he held a gun, or a knife? My skin tingles at the point of contact, like he's transmitting electricity through his skin. "My first instinct is to push you until you break, just to see how hard I have to press." he says, his fingers squeezing at the word break . My body tenses at the edge in his voice, so I am coiled as tight as a spring, and I forget to breathe. His dark eyes lifting to mine, he adds, "But I resist it." "Why..." I swallow hard. "Why is that your first instinct?" "Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up. I've seen it. It's fascinating." He releases me but doesn't pull away, his hand grazing my jaw, my neck. "Sometimes I just want to see it again. Want to see you awake.”” [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A character reveals that their instinct is to push others to their limits, not to protect, seeing fear as a catalyst for awakening. **In simple terms:** He pushes to awaken, not protect. Key Takeaway Embrace challenges that spark growth. Themes fear awakening power dynamics control resilience Mood tense intense provocative Type dialogue character study When to use this quote - personal relationships - conflict resolution - self‑discovery - intense dialogue Key Concepts psychology human behavior motivation Questions to Reflect On - What limits do you set for yourself when pressured? - How can fear be transformed into motivation? A Different Perspective The push can become abuse if not balanced with empathy. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Chivalry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/chivalry/) [Dark eyes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dark-eyes/) [Instinct](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/instinct/) ## Related quotes > [You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong." He leans his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“You think my first instinct is to protect you because you are small or a girl or a stiff, but you are wrong. My…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-are-small/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a stiff. But you're wrong. My first instinct…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or-2/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [The main source of psychopathic diseases is the fundamental instinct of fear with its manifestations, the feeling of anxiety, anguish, and worry.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/boris-sidis/the-main-source-of-psychopathic-diseases-is-the-fundamental-instinct/) [Boris Sidis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/boris-sidis/) > [Fear is a survival instinct; fear in its way is a comfort for it means that somewhere hope is alive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-sturgeon/fear-is-a-survival-instinct-fear-in-its-way-is-a-comfort-for-it-means/) [Theodore Sturgeon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-sturgeon/) > [Superstitions, and especially the early cultivation of religion, with its "fear of the Lord" and of unknown mysterious agencies, are especially potent in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/boris-sidis/superstitions-and-especially-the-early-cultivation-of-religion-with/) [Boris Sidis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/boris-sidis/) > [Instinct Versus Intuition: Instinct is fear based, designed to protect. Intuition is possibility based, designed to create.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tanya-lacy-intercept-experience/instinct-versus-intuition-instinct-is-fear-based-designed-to-protect/) Tanya Lacy - Intercept Experience > [One of the things that happens when you write characters - and maybe this is my own sentimentality - is that I always find…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greta-gerwig/one-of-the-things-that-happens-when-you-write-characters-and-maybe/) [Greta Gerwig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greta-gerwig/) > [...as your father, my instinct is to protect you ... Other people will want to protect you too. But remember that you are not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brad-meltzer/as-your-father-my-instinct-is-to-protect-you-other-people-will-want/) [Brad Meltzer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brad-meltzer/) > [Mothers instinct...Protect her child at all cost...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/mothers-instinct-protect-her-child-at-all-cost/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“A dragons first instinct is to protect and defend. Its not your fault.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/candace-knoebel/a-dragons-first-instinct-is-to-protect-and-defend-its-not-your-fault/) [Candace Knoebel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/candace-knoebel/) > [~My instinct is to protect my children from pain. But adversity is often the thing that gives us character and backbone. It's always been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nicole-kidman/my-instinct-is-to-protect-my-children-from-pain-but-adversity-is/) [Nicole Kidman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nicole-kidman/) > [I guess everyone has their reasons for keeping people away, an instinct to protect yourself from getting hurt. It's part of human nature.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bernajoy-vaal/i-guess-everyone-has-their-reasons-for-keeping-people-away-an/) [Bernajoy Vaal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bernajoy-vaal/) > [“It’s smart to want to be safe. It’s a natural instinct. If we protect ourselves—our bodies, our minds, our hearts—we can avoid all these…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roni-loren/it-s-smart-to-want-to-be-safe-it-s-a-natural-instinct-if-we-protect/) [Roni Loren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roni-loren/) > [“All men are born firstly with the instinct to protect themselves. But few grow to really love themselves, and even fewer learn to love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/criss-jami/all-men-are-born-firstly-with-the-instinct-to-protect-themselves-but/) [Criss Jami](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/criss-jami/) ## More by Veronica Roth > [How strange that something so simple could have been instrumental in my decision to ruin one of my most relationships and friendships, and damage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/how-strange-that-something-so-simple-could-have-been-instrumental-in/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“I was beginning to feel that I had finally found a place to stay, a place that was not so unstable or corrupt or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/i-was-beginning-to-feel-that-i-had-finally-found-a-place-to-stay-a/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“He acts so tough that he’s probably afraid of marshmallows and really bright sunrises or something. Overcompensating.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/he-acts-so-tough-that-he-s-probably-afraid-of-marshmallows-and-really/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [And is it selfish of me to crave victory, or is it brave?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/and-is-it-selfish-of-me-to-crave-victory-or-is-it-brave/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [You always look like someone's sucked the life right out of you when something fascinates you. -Tris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-always-look-like-someone-s-sucked-the-life-right-out-of-you-when/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“We can be mended. We mend each other.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/we-can-be-mended-we-mend-each-other/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [Don’t worry about me handling the pain," I say. "I’ve had a lot of practice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/don-t-worry-about-me-handling-the-pain-i-say-i-ve-had-a-lot-of/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [Soon I will honor my parents by dying as they died. and if all they believed about death was true, soon I will join…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/soon-i-will-honor-my-parents-by-dying-as-they-died-and-if-all-they/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Mas lembre-se, já agora, que por vezes as pessoas que oprimimos tornam-se mais poderosas do que nós gostaríamos.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/mas-lembre-se-j-agora-que-por-vezes-as-pessoas-que-oprimimos-tornam/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“am aware of how little space there is between us—six inches at most. That space feels charged with electricity. I feel like it should…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/am-aware-of-how-little-space-there-is-between-us-six-inches-at-most/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Oh, good,” I say, a sour taste in my mouth. “Heroism is what I was focused on. Not, you know, trying not to die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/oh-good-i-say-a-sour-taste-in-my-mouth-heroism-is-what-i-was-focused/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Caleb frowns at him. "How old are you, anyway?" "Eighteen." "And you don't think you're too old to be with my little sister?" Tobias…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/caleb-frowns-at-him-how-old-are-you-anyway-eighteen-and-you-don-t/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [What do you think they're going to do to us when they find us guilty?" she says after a few minutes of silence have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/what-do-you-think-they-re-going-to-do-to-us-when-they-find-us-guilty/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“La paz está restringida, eso es libertad”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/la-paz-est-restringida-eso-es-libertad/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [In some parts of the ancient world, the hawk symbolized the sun. Back when I got this, I figured if I always had the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/in-some-parts-of-the-ancient-world-the-hawk-symbolized-the-sun-back/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) [Explore all 1,589 Veronica Roth quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) ## More Chivalry quotes > [Here is the world of imagination, hopes, and dreams. In this timeless land of enchantment, the age of chivalry, magic and make-believe are reborn…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walt-disney/here-is-the-world-of-imagination-hopes-and-dreams-in-this-timeless/) [Walt Disney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walt-disney/) > [To awaken chivalry we must return to femininity. We must stop doing the masculine things and become the gentle, tender, dependent women we were…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/helen-andelin/to-awaken-chivalry-we-must-return-to-femininity-we-must-stop-doing/) [Helen Andelin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/helen-andelin/) > [Chivalry is a poor substitute for justice, if one cannot have both. Chivalry is something like the icing on the cake, sweet but not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nellie-l-mcclung/chivalry-is-a-poor-substitute-for-justice-if-one-cannot-have-both/) [Nellie L. McClung](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nellie-l-mcclung/) > [What if custom is wrong? demanded the part of her that believed in the code of chivalry. A knight must set things right.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tamora-pierce/what-if-custom-is-wrong-demanded-the-part-of-her-that-believed-in-the/) [Tamora Pierce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tamora-pierce/) > [My further advice on your relations to women is based upon that other motto of chivalry, "Serve all, love one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/honor-de-balzac/my-further-advice-on-your-relations-to-women-is-based-upon-that-other/) [Honore de Balzac](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/honor-de-balzac/) > [I admit it is better fun to punt than be punted, and that a desire to have all the fun is nine-tenths of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-l-sayers/i-admit-it-is-better-fun-to-punt-than-be-punted-and-that-a-desire-to/) [Dorothy L. Sayers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-l-sayers/) > [“Is this chivalry?” Catarina said with a smile. “Thought that was dead.” “Like us, it never dies.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/is-this-chivalry-catarina-said-with-a-smile-thought-that-was-dead/) [Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/) > [I named my album Year of the Gentleman. Just looking at how the essence of what it is to be a gentleman is very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ne-yo/i-named-my-album-year-of-the-gentleman-just-looking-at-how-the/) [Ne-Yo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ne-yo/) > [Knighterrantry is a most chuckleheaded trade, and it is tedious hard work, too, but I begin to see that there is money in it,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/knighterrantry-is-a-most-chuckleheaded-trade-and-it-is-tedious-hard/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [“Traditional values are not gone. They are good netiquette.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-chiles/traditional-values-are-not-gone-they-are-good-netiquette/) [David Chiles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-chiles/) > [“Chivalry in academia is dead.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvain-reynard/chivalry-in-academia-is-dead/) [Sylvain Reynard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvain-reynard/) > [“Gentlemen always walk ladies home.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabriellyn-gidman/gentlemen-always-walk-ladies-home/) [Gabriellyn Gidman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabriellyn-gidman/) > [I don't know where my romanticism comes from. My mom and dad would read to me a lot. 'Treasure Island,' 'Robinson Crusoe,' tales of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-radcliffe/i-don-t-know-where-my-romanticism-comes-from-my-mom-and-dad-would/) [Daniel Radcliffe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-radcliffe/) > [“... for a man may cover his blemish, but unbind it he cannot, for where once 'tis applied, thence part will it never.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-r-r-tolkien/for-a-man-may-cover-his-blemish-but-unbind-it-he-cannot-for-where/) [J.R.R. Tolkien](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-r-r-tolkien/) > [“In medieval times, contrary to popular belief, most knights were bandits, mercenaries, lawless brigands, skinners, highwaymen, and thieves. The supposed chivalry of Charlemagne and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tod-wodicka/in-medieval-times-contrary-to-popular-belief-most-knights-were/) [Tod Wodicka](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tod-wodicka/) [Browse all 256 Chivalry quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/chivalry/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong.\" He leans his face close to mine and wraps his fingers around my chin. His hand smells like metal. When was the last time he held a gun, or a knife? My skin tingles at the point of contact, like he's transmitting electricity through his skin. \"My first instinct is to push you until you break, just to see how hard I have to press.\" he says, his fingers squeezing at the word break . My body tenses at the edge in his voice, so I am coiled as tight as a spring, and I forget to breathe. His dark eyes lifting to mine, he adds, \"But I resist it.\" \"Why...\" I swallow hard. \"Why is that your first instinct?\" \"Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up. I've seen it. It's fascinating.\" He releases me but doesn't pull away, his hand grazing my jaw, my neck. \"Sometimes I just want to see it again. Want to see you awake.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Veronica Roth" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or-3/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Chivalry" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or-3/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/13c/veronica-roth-66_chivalry_you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protec_2955591.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're…” — Veronica Roth", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Veronica Roth", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“You think my first instinct is...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or-3/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-think-my-first-instinct-is-to-protect-you-because-you-re-small-or-3/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```