--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't…" description: "\"“It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. And anyone who tells you it's okay is a liar.”\" — Veronica Roth" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30a/veronica-roth-66_liar_it-shouldn-t-have-happened-it-shouldn-t_1156589.png" --- # It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to… ![“It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. And anyone who tells you it's okay is a liar.” quote by Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30a/veronica-roth-66_liar_it-shouldn-t-have-happened-it-shouldn-t_1156589.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30a/veronica-roth-66_liar_it-shouldn-t-have-happened-it-shouldn-t_1156589.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/30a/veronica-roth-66_liar_it-shouldn-t-have-happened-it-shouldn-t_1156589.png) > ““It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. And anyone who tells you it's okay is a liar.”” [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. A traumatic event is dismissed, and false reassurance is harmful; genuine empathy is needed. **In simple terms:** Dismissive comfort is a lie after trauma. Key Takeaway Offer sincere support, not empty reassurance. Themes trauma empathy support honesty psychology Mood empathetic serious Type thoughtful compassionate When to use this quote - counseling sessions - friend conversations - support groups Key Concepts victim blaming invalidating healing trustbuilding Questions to Reflect On - What does true empathy look like? - How can we avoid minimizing others' pain? A Different Perspective People may avoid confronting pain. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Happened Shouldn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happened-shouldn-763691/) [Happened Tells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happened-tells-3292681/) [Liar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/liar/) [Okay Liar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/okay-liar-2795094/) [Shouldn Happened](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/shouldn-happened-403591/) ## Related quotes > [If you're okay with being a liar, then you're okay with being lied to as well.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/koni-g/if-you-re-okay-with-being-a-liar-then-you-re-okay-with-being-lied-to/) [Koni G](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/koni-g/) > [It's wrong," he says. "It doesn't matter if your parents are in a better place, they aren't here with you, and that's wrong, Tris.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/it-s-wrong-he-says-it-doesn-t-matter-if-your-parents-are-in-a-better/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [If you didn't regret it at the time it happened, you shouldn't regret it now.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/if-you-didn-t-regret-it-at-the-time-it-happened-you-shouldn-t-regret/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [A place where something so terrible had happened shouldn't continue to exist in the world](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ron-rash/a-place-where-something-so-terrible-had-happened-shouldn-t-continue/) [Ron Rash](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ron-rash/) > [Soo you think you know me by what you heard and didn't see. It's funny how you listen to that goosip and them make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cherise-j/soo-you-think-you-know-me-by-what-you-heard-and-didn-t-see-it-s-funny/) [Cherise J](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cherise-j/) > [“You can point to Deal A and say, "That shouldn't have happened," but what does a guy in my position do? Challenge one? I'd…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cristina-alger/you-can-point-to-deal-a-and-say-that-shouldn-t-have-happened-but-what/) [Cristina Alger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cristina-alger/) > [The Work reveals that what you think shouldn't have happened should have happened. It should happened because it did, and no thinking in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/byron-katie/the-work-reveals-that-what-you-think-shouldn-t-have-happened-should/) [Byron Katie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/byron-katie/) > [You’re going to tell me that last night shouldn’t have happened.” No. I’m glad it happened. For too long, I’ve been telling myself that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claudia-gray/you-re-going-to-tell-me-that-last-night-shouldn-t-have-happened-no-i/) [Claudia Gray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claudia-gray/) > [My first marriage was totally unsuitable and shouldn't have happened. It was a whirlwind, rebound thing. I was 23 or 24 - a baby.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carol-vorderman/my-first-marriage-was-totally-unsuitable-and-shouldn-t-have-happened/) [Carol Vorderman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carol-vorderman/) > [“Stop. That was a mistake. It shouldn’t have happened." "No?" "No." "I could offer you more.” "What?” "Power. Access. Rewards. You’d need be available…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chloe-neill/stop-that-was-a-mistake-it-shouldn-t-have-happened-no-no-i-could/) [Chloe Neill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chloe-neill/) > [Okay. Then...I can talk. Ask me something." "Okay." He laughs shakily in my ear. "Why is your heart racing Tris?" I cringe and say,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/okay-then-i-can-talk-ask-me-something-okay-he-laughs-shakily-in-my/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [A liar freely gives his oath](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-malloch/a-liar-freely-gives-his-oath/) [Douglas Malloch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-malloch/) > [Even a liar tells a hundred truths to one lie; he has to, to make the lie good for anything.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ward-beecher/even-a-liar-tells-a-hundred-truths-to-one-lie-he-has-to-to-make-the/) [Henry Ward Beecher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ward-beecher/) > [Everybody is always like, 'You must be a really good liar,' and no, I'm actually a truth teller, and I'm telling someone else's truth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sydney-sweeney/everybody-is-always-like-you-must-be-a-really-good-liar-and-no-i-m/) [Sydney Sweeney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sydney-sweeney/) > [I just speak the truth. I keep it real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marlon-vera/i-just-speak-the-truth-i-keep-it-real/) [Marlon Vera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marlon-vera/) ## More by Veronica Roth > [How strange that something so simple could have been instrumental in my decision to ruin one of my most relationships and friendships, and damage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/how-strange-that-something-so-simple-could-have-been-instrumental-in/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“I was beginning to feel that I had finally found a place to stay, a place that was not so unstable or corrupt or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/i-was-beginning-to-feel-that-i-had-finally-found-a-place-to-stay-a/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“He acts so tough that he’s probably afraid of marshmallows and really bright sunrises or something. Overcompensating.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/he-acts-so-tough-that-he-s-probably-afraid-of-marshmallows-and-really/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [And is it selfish of me to crave victory, or is it brave?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/and-is-it-selfish-of-me-to-crave-victory-or-is-it-brave/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [You always look like someone's sucked the life right out of you when something fascinates you. -Tris](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/you-always-look-like-someone-s-sucked-the-life-right-out-of-you-when/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“We can be mended. We mend each other.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/we-can-be-mended-we-mend-each-other/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [Don’t worry about me handling the pain," I say. "I’ve had a lot of practice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/don-t-worry-about-me-handling-the-pain-i-say-i-ve-had-a-lot-of/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [Soon I will honor my parents by dying as they died. and if all they believed about death was true, soon I will join…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/soon-i-will-honor-my-parents-by-dying-as-they-died-and-if-all-they/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Mas lembre-se, já agora, que por vezes as pessoas que oprimimos tornam-se mais poderosas do que nós gostaríamos.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/mas-lembre-se-j-agora-que-por-vezes-as-pessoas-que-oprimimos-tornam/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“am aware of how little space there is between us—six inches at most. That space feels charged with electricity. I feel like it should…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/am-aware-of-how-little-space-there-is-between-us-six-inches-at-most/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Oh, good,” I say, a sour taste in my mouth. “Heroism is what I was focused on. Not, you know, trying not to die.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/oh-good-i-say-a-sour-taste-in-my-mouth-heroism-is-what-i-was-focused/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“Caleb frowns at him. "How old are you, anyway?" "Eighteen." "And you don't think you're too old to be with my little sister?" Tobias…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/caleb-frowns-at-him-how-old-are-you-anyway-eighteen-and-you-don-t/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [What do you think they're going to do to us when they find us guilty?" she says after a few minutes of silence have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/what-do-you-think-they-re-going-to-do-to-us-when-they-find-us-guilty/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [“La paz está restringida, eso es libertad”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/la-paz-est-restringida-eso-es-libertad/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) > [In some parts of the ancient world, the hawk symbolized the sun. Back when I got this, I figured if I always had the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/veronica-roth/in-some-parts-of-the-ancient-world-the-hawk-symbolized-the-sun-back/) [Veronica Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) [Explore all 1,589 Veronica Roth quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/veronica-roth/) ## More Liar quotes > [I just speak the truth. I keep it real.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marlon-vera/i-just-speak-the-truth-i-keep-it-real/) [Marlon Vera](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marlon-vera/) > [Everybody is always like, 'You must be a really good liar,' and no, I'm actually a truth teller, and I'm telling someone else's truth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sydney-sweeney/everybody-is-always-like-you-must-be-a-really-good-liar-and-no-i-m/) [Sydney Sweeney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sydney-sweeney/) > [Even a liar tells a hundred truths to one lie; he has to, to make the lie good for anything.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ward-beecher/even-a-liar-tells-a-hundred-truths-to-one-lie-he-has-to-to-make-the/) [Henry Ward Beecher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ward-beecher/) > [A liar freely gives his oath](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/douglas-malloch/a-liar-freely-gives-his-oath/) [Douglas Malloch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/douglas-malloch/) > [My whole life has been a lie.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bobby-darin/my-whole-life-has-been-a-lie/) [Bobby Darin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bobby-darin/) > [I think you are a liar because you think you know what is true. You think you feel what is true. But you do…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-croggon/i-think-you-are-a-liar-because-you-think-you-know-what-is-true-you/) [Alison Croggon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-croggon/) > [“The world is not fair, and often fools, cowards, liars and the selfish hide in high places. (p 57)”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bryant-mcgill/the-world-is-not-fair-and-often-fools-cowards-liars-and-the-selfish/) [Bryant McGill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bryant-mcgill/) > [I love country music because it's honest - and I'm a terrible liar.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maddie-marlow/i-love-country-music-because-it-s-honest-and-i-m-a-terrible-liar/) [Maddie Marlow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maddie-marlow/) > [“I ripped the sketch from the wall. "Liar." Edward looked more ravaged than usual. "That is a terrible word, coming from you." "Yup." "And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melissa-jensen/i-ripped-the-sketch-from-the-wall-liar-edward-looked-more-ravaged/) [Melissa Jensen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melissa-jensen/) > [“I wasn't sure which was worse - to know you were a liar or to believe your own bullshit.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eileen-cook/i-wasn-t-sure-which-was-worse-to-know-you-were-a-liar-or-to-believe/) [Eileen Cook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eileen-cook/) > [I don't want to lie. Always, I want to be honest and I say,I don't think about tomorrow. I don't think about next season.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mauricio-pochettino/i-don-t-want-to-lie-always-i-want-to-be-honest-and-i-say-i-don-t/) [Mauricio Pochettino](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mauricio-pochettino/) > [I can't lie. Even if they think I'm wrong. Even if they don't understand. Even if they think I'm crazy. I'm me. They're supposed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-can-t-lie-even-if-they-think-i-m-wrong-even-if-they-don-t/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [That's good; don't deny it. Denying the undeniable just makes you sound like a fool as well as a liar. In this profession, you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ally-carter/that-s-good-don-t-deny-it-denying-the-undeniable-just-makes-you-sound/) [Ally Carter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ally-carter/) > [And I, love, am a pathological liar,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-plath/and-i-love-am-a-pathological-liar/) [Sylvia Plath](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-plath/) > [Im starting to feel as though I should give up now to not risk what we have. keep silent what I want to speak.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/aaliyah-owens/im-starting-to-feel-as-though-i-should-give-up-now-to-not-risk-what/) [Aaliyah Owens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/aaliyah-owens/) [Browse all 1,187 Liar quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/liar/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“It shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have happened to you. 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