--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I have been thinking that the social…" description: "\"“I have been thinking that the social moulds civilisation fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the c..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf8/thomas-hardy-410_convention_i-have-been-thinking-that-the-social-mou_812103.jpg" --- # I have been thinking that the social moulds civilisation… ![“I have been thinking that the social moulds civilisation fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the constellations have to the real star-patterns. I am called Mrs. Richard Phillotson, living a calm wedded life with my counterpart of that name. But I…” quote by Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf8/thomas-hardy-410_convention_i-have-been-thinking-that-the-social-mou_812103.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf8/thomas-hardy-410_convention_i-have-been-thinking-that-the-social-mou_812103.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cf8/thomas-hardy-410_convention_i-have-been-thinking-that-the-social-mou_812103.jpg) > ““I have been thinking that the social moulds civilisation fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the constellations have to the real star-patterns. I am called Mrs. Richard Phillotson, living a calm wedded life with my counterpart of that name. But I am not really Mrs. Richard Phillotson, but a woman tossed about, all alone, with aberrant passions, and unaccountable antipathies…”” [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Hardy compares social roles to imagined constellations, suggesting they are arbitrary and misaligned with true identity. **In simple terms:** Social roles are arbitrary and misaligned with true identity. Key Takeaway Recognize and question imposed identities. Themes identity society conformity alienation gender Mood reflective melancholic Type literary philosophical When to use this quote - marriage - career - personal growth - artistic expression Key Concepts existentialism social construct selfhood Questions to Reflect On - How do you define yourself beyond societal expectations? - What freedoms arise when you reject imposed roles? A Different Perspective Roles may be deeply internalized, making change painful. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Civilisation Fits](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/civilisation-fits-270426/) [Constellations Real](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/constellations-real-262826/) [Convention](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/convention/) [Desire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/desire/) [Nature](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nature/) [Passions](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/passions/) [Phillotson Living](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/phillotson-living-270427/) [Phillotson Woman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/phillotson-woman-270424/) [Society](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/society/) [Star Patterns](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/star-patterns-270425/) ## Related quotes > [...the social mould civilization fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the constellations have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/the-social-mould-civilization-fits-us-into-have-no-more-relation-to/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“I have been thinking", she continued, still in the tone of one brimful of feeling, "that the social moulds civilization fits us into have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/i-have-been-thinking-she-continued-still-in-the-tone-of-one-brimful/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“the social moulds civilization fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the constellations have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/the-social-moulds-civilization-fits-us-into-have-no-more-relation-to/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [In the movie, the stars above the ship bear no correspondence to any constellations in a real sky. Worse yet, while the heroine bobs...…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neil-degrasse-tyson/in-the-movie-the-stars-above-the-ship-bear-no-correspondence-to-any/) [Neil deGrasse Tyson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/neil-degrasse-tyson/) > [“We'd been trying so hard to look like our heroes, we'd kinda forgotten what a hero really is. Capes, masks, powers — sure, that's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mikko/we-d-been-trying-so-hard-to-look-like-our-heroes-we-d-kinda-forgotten/) [Mikko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mikko/) > [No one familiar with the common law of England can read the Constitution of the United States without observing the great desire of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-freeman-miller/no-one-familiar-with-the-common-law-of-england-can-read-the/) [Samuel Freeman Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-freeman-miller/) > [“He needed the people and the clamour around him. There was no questions and no doubts when he stood on a platform over a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayn-rand/he-needed-the-people-and-the-clamour-around-him-there-was-no/) [Ayn Rand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayn-rand/) > [There's a War Crimes Act in the United States passed by a Republican Congress in 1996, which says that grave breaches of the Geneva…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noam-chomsky/there-s-a-war-crimes-act-in-the-united-states-passed-by-a-republican/) [Noam Chomsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noam-chomsky/) > [Society's the mother of convention.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-wells/society-s-the-mother-of-convention/) [Carolyn Wells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-wells/) > [“Yielding to convention yields nothing new.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rich-disilvio/yielding-to-convention-yields-nothing-new/) [Rich DiSilvio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rich-disilvio/) > [A convention is a social pattern we have chosen to prefer over whatever the raw world simply proffers. It is a sign of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-bartlett-giamatti/a-convention-is-a-social-pattern-we-have-chosen-to-prefer-over/) [A. Bartlett Giamatti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-bartlett-giamatti/) > [Only in Washington would the Republican operatives get the entire press corps ginned up over the notion that I'm going to be home campaigning…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/claire-mccaskill/only-in-washington-would-the-republican-operatives-get-the-entire/) [Claire McCaskill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/claire-mccaskill/) > [The calendar? A mere convention.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irina-ratushinskaya/the-calendar-a-mere-convention/) [Irina Ratushinskaya](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irina-ratushinskaya/) > [Convention was our safeguard: could one have stronger?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-bowen/convention-was-our-safeguard-could-one-have-stronger/) [Elizabeth Bowen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-bowen/) > [The United States, a signatory to the Chemical Weapons Convention, destroyed the last of its stocks of VX and other chemical agents on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barton-gellman/the-united-states-a-signatory-to-the-chemical-weapons-convention/) [Barton Gellman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barton-gellman/) ## More by Thomas Hardy > [“He grew away from old associations, and saw something new in life and humanity. Secondarily, he made close acquaintance with phenomena which he had…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/he-grew-away-from-old-associations-and-saw-something-new-in-life-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“She was in a sound sleep, Jude, dying of anxiety lest she should have caught a chill which might permanently injure her, was glad…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/she-was-in-a-sound-sleep-jude-dying-of-anxiety-lest-she-should-have/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [Meanwhile, the trees were just as green as before; the birds sang and the sun shone as clearly now as ever. The familiar surroundings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/meanwhile-the-trees-were-just-as-green-as-before-the-birds-sang-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [You ride well, but you don't kiss nicely at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/you-ride-well-but-you-don-t-kiss-nicely-at-all/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [You could sometimes see her twelfth year in her cheeks, or her ninth sparkling from her eyes; and even her fifth would flit over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/you-could-sometimes-see-her-twelfth-year-in-her-cheeks-or-her-ninth/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“It was mid-May time, bringing with it weather not, perhaps, quite so blooming as that assumed to be natural to the month by the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/it-was-mid-may-time-bringing-with-it-weather-not-perhaps-quite-so/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [If Galileo had said in verse that the world moved, the inquisition might have let him alone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/if-galileo-had-said-in-verse-that-the-world-moved-the-inquisition/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [Some folk want their luck buttered.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/some-folk-want-their-luck-buttered/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [Measurement of life should be proportioned rather to the intensity of the experience than to its actual length.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/measurement-of-life-should-be-proportioned-rather-to-the-intensity-of/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“I was court-martialed in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/i-was-court-martialed-in-my-absence-and-sentenced-to-death-in-my/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“It being the first time in his life that he had touched female fingers under water, Dick duly registered the sensation as rather a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/it-being-the-first-time-in-his-life-that-he-had-touched-female/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“As soon as she could discern the outline of the house, it had all its old effect upon Tess's imagination. Part of her body…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/as-soon-as-she-could-discern-the-outline-of-the-house-it-had-all-its/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [ The perfect woman, you see \[is\] a working-woman; not an idler; not a fine lady; but one who \[uses\] her hands and her head… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/the-perfect-woman-you-see-is-a-working-woman-not-an-idler-not-a-fine/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“The Sinister Spirit sneered: 'It had to be!' And again the Spirit of Pity whispered, 'Why?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/the-sinister-spirit-sneered-it-had-to-be-and-again-the-spirit-of-pity/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) > [“Justice” was done, and the President of the Immortals (in Aeschylean phrase) had ended his sport with Tess.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/justice-was-done-and-the-president-of-the-immortals-in-aeschylean/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) [Explore all 561 Thomas Hardy quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) ## More Convention quotes > [No one familiar with the common law of England can read the Constitution of the United States without observing the great desire of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-freeman-miller/no-one-familiar-with-the-common-law-of-england-can-read-the/) [Samuel Freeman Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-freeman-miller/) > [“He needed the people and the clamour around him. 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Capes, masks, powers — sure, that's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mikko/we-d-been-trying-so-hard-to-look-like-our-heroes-we-d-kinda-forgotten/) [Mikko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mikko/) > [Convention was our safeguard: could one have stronger?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-bowen/convention-was-our-safeguard-could-one-have-stronger/) [Elizabeth Bowen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-bowen/) > [The calendar? A mere convention.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irina-ratushinskaya/the-calendar-a-mere-convention/) [Irina Ratushinskaya](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irina-ratushinskaya/) > [The United States, a signatory to the Chemical Weapons Convention, destroyed the last of its stocks of VX and other chemical agents on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barton-gellman/the-united-states-a-signatory-to-the-chemical-weapons-convention/) [Barton Gellman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barton-gellman/) > [A convention is a social pattern we have chosen to prefer over whatever the raw world simply proffers. It is a sign of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/a-bartlett-giamatti/a-convention-is-a-social-pattern-we-have-chosen-to-prefer-over/) [A. Bartlett Giamatti](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/a-bartlett-giamatti/) > [“Yielding to convention yields nothing new.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rich-disilvio/yielding-to-convention-yields-nothing-new/) [Rich DiSilvio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rich-disilvio/) > [Society's the mother of convention.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-wells/society-s-the-mother-of-convention/) [Carolyn Wells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-wells/) > [There's a War Crimes Act in the United States passed by a Republican Congress in 1996, which says that grave breaches of the Geneva…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noam-chomsky/there-s-a-war-crimes-act-in-the-united-states-passed-by-a-republican/) [Noam Chomsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noam-chomsky/) > [A political convention is just not a place where you come away with any trace of faith in human nature.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/murray-kempton/a-political-convention-is-just-not-a-place-where-you-come-away-with/) [Murray Kempton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/murray-kempton/) > [The difference between a GOP convention and Comic-Con is that the people at Comic-Con have a much firmer grasp of reality.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-maher/the-difference-between-a-gop-convention-and-comic-con-is-that-the/) [Bill Maher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-maher/) > [I am exceedingly distressed at the proceedings of the Convention-being ... almost sure, they will ... lay the foundation of a Civil War.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elbridge-gerry/i-am-exceedingly-distressed-at-the-proceedings-of-the-convention/) [Elbridge Gerry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elbridge-gerry/) > [Convention, so often a mask for injustice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edith-hamilton/convention-so-often-a-mask-for-injustice/) [Edith Hamilton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edith-hamilton/) [Browse all 182 Convention quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/convention/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I have been thinking that the social moulds civilisation fits us into have no more relation to our actual shapes than the conventional shapes of the constellations have to the real star-patterns. 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