--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It is only by having desire thwarted, and…" description: "\"It is only by having desire thwarted, and thereby learning to control it — in other words, by becoming civilized — that men become fully human.\" — Theo..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/138/theodore-dalrymple-7084_becoming_it-is-only-by-having-desire-thwarted-and_2539233.png" --- # It is only by having desire thwarted, and thereby learning… ![“It is only by having desire thwarted, and thereby learning to control it — in other words, by becoming civilized — that men become fully human.” quote by Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/138/theodore-dalrymple-7084_becoming_it-is-only-by-having-desire-thwarted-and_2539233.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/138/theodore-dalrymple-7084_becoming_it-is-only-by-having-desire-thwarted-and_2539233.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/138/theodore-dalrymple-7084_becoming_it-is-only-by-having-desire-thwarted-and_2539233.png) > “It is only by having desire thwarted, and thereby learning to control it — in other words, by becoming civilized — that men become fully human.” [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Civilization arises from mastering desire; without restraint, humanity remains animalistic. **In simple terms:** Self‑control creates humanity. Key Takeaway Cultivate self‑discipline. Themes civilization desire self‑control human nature ethics Mood reflective analytical Type philosophical psychological When to use this quote - parenting - education - personal development - conflict resolution Key Concepts psychology philosophy sociology Questions to Reflect On - How do you tame your impulses? - What societal factors hinder self‑discipline? A Different Perspective Self‑control is hard to maintain under societal pressures. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Becoming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/becoming/) [Civilized](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/civilized/) [Civilized Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/civilized-men-532816/) [Desire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/desire/) [Fully Human](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fully-human-313905/) [Having Desire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/having-desire-1335240/) [Humans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humans/) [Men](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/men/) ## Related quotes > [Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-e-howard/civilized-men-are-more-discourteous-than-savages-because-they-know/) [Robert E. Howard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-e-howard/) > [...men can only be highly civilized while other men, inevitably less civilized, are there to guard and feed them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-orwell/men-can-only-be-highly-civilized-while-other-men-inevitably-less/) [George Orwell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-orwell/) > [Until we begin to discover the national values that for centuries have allowed us to rise above our natures and act as civilized men…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-delay/until-we-begin-to-discover-the-national-values-that-for-centuries/) [Tom DeLay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-delay/) > [The right most valued by all civilized men is the right to be left alone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-d-brandeis/the-right-most-valued-by-all-civilized-men-is-the-right-to-be-left/) [Louis D. Brandeis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-d-brandeis/) > [Failure, to me, is not having the desire to try. Having the desire to try is in it own way success.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bobby-knight/failure-to-me-is-not-having-the-desire-to-try-having-the-desire-to/) [Bobby Knight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bobby-knight/) > [“All happiness and all unhappiness ... stems from one having a desire. And that is why mankind will always make their wishes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/clamp/all-happiness-and-all-unhappiness-stems-from-one-having-a-desire-and/) [CLAMP](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/clamp/) > [The dead are happy, having no desire. I rise and fall, and rise and fall again, Something is in me, famishing for bread, Baffled…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-symons/the-dead-are-happy-having-no-desire-i-rise-and-fall-and-rise-and-fall/) [Arthur Symons](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-symons/) > [“Love enjoys knowing everything about you; desire needs mystery. 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It was an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/danny-scheinmann/well-i-once-lived-in-a-town-full-of-ambitious-people-people-who/) [Danny Scheinmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/danny-scheinmann/) > [That said, deciding to avoid other people does not necessarily equate with having no desire whatsoever for company; it may simply reflect a dissatisfaction…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alain-de-botton/that-said-deciding-to-avoid-other-people-does-not-necessarily-equate/) [Alain de Botton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alain-de-botton/) > [There's nothing wrong with having a desire to want nice things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demi-moore/there-s-nothing-wrong-with-having-a-desire-to-want-nice-things/) [Demi Moore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demi-moore/) > [I don't have the recipe for happiness, but I think the engine is simply having the desire.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vanessa-paradis/i-don-t-have-the-recipe-for-happiness-but-i-think-the-engine-is/) [Vanessa Paradis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vanessa-paradis/) > [“If intimacy grows through repetition and familiarity, eroticism is numbed by repetition. It thrives on the mysterious, the novel, and the unexpected. Love is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/if-intimacy-grows-through-repetition-and-familiarity-eroticism-is/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“This is said to civilized men who are to venture into countries where sacred cows are fed, while children are left to starve -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayn-rand/this-is-said-to-civilized-men-who-are-to-venture-into-countries-where/) [Ayn Rand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayn-rand/) ## More by Theodore Dalrymple > [Life is a biography, not a series of disconnected moments, more or less pleasurable but increasingly tedious and unsatisfying unless one imposes a purposive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/life-is-a-biography-not-a-series-of-disconnected-moments-more-or-less/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [Many young people now end a discussion with the supposedly definitive and unanswerable statement that such is their opinion, and their opinion is just…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/many-young-people-now-end-a-discussion-with-the-supposedly-definitive/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“even received a few requests that I send medicine, since none was available in the local pharmacies—an admission, unthinkable a few years ago, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/even-received-a-few-requests-that-i-send-medicine-since-none-was/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [There is nothing an addict likes more, or that serves as better pretext for continuing his present way of life, than to place the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/there-is-nothing-an-addict-likes-more-or-that-serves-as-better/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“pride must be in the work, not the person.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/pride-must-be-in-the-work-not-the-person/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“In The Gulag Archipelago, for example, Alexander Solzhenitsyn remarks that Shakespeare’s evildoers, Macbeth notably among them, stop short at a mere dozen corpses because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/in-the-gulag-archipelago-for-example-alexander-solzhenitsyn-remarks/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [Orders can be benign or malign, but the habit of obeying them can become ingrained.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/orders-can-be-benign-or-malign-but-the-habit-of-obeying-them-can/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“A taste for kitsch among the well-to-do is a sign of spiritual impoverishment; but among the poor, it represents a striving for beauty, an…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/a-taste-for-kitsch-among-the-well-to-do-is-a-sign-of-spiritual/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“Facts are much more malleable than prejudices.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/facts-are-much-more-malleable-than-prejudices/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“Political correctness is communist propaganda writ small. In my study of communist societies, I came to the conclusion that the purpose of communist propaganda…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/political-correctness-is-communist-propaganda-writ-small-in-my-study/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [“People with no experience of life except under communist regimes would tell me that they knew—though they were unsure how—that their life was not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/people-with-no-experience-of-life-except-under-communist-regimes/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [When people are forced to remain silent when they are being told the most obvious lies, or even worse when they are forced to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-dalrymple/when-people-are-forced-to-remain-silent-when-they-are-being-told-the/) [Theodore Dalrymple](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-dalrymple/) > [There is something deeply attractive, at least to quite a lot of people, about squalor, misery, and vice. 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