---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva?…"
description: "\"“What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If I’d known you were out there, I would’ve ..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png"
---

#  What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you…

![“What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If I’d known you were out there, I would’ve hunted you down. I wouldn’t have waited a second to find you. But I didn’t know, and I settled for less. So did you. We both wasted ourselves on the…” quote by Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png)

> ““What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If I’d known you were out there, I would’ve hunted you down. I wouldn’t have waited a second to find you. But I didn’t know, and I settled for less. So did you. We both wasted ourselves on the wrong people.””

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

The speaker regrets missed connections and wasted time on unsuitable partners, realizing that lack of awareness led to poor choices.

**In simple terms:** Regret over missed chances and wrong relationships.

Key Takeaway

Recognize and pursue what truly matters.

Themes

regret relationships selfawareness

Mood

reflective somber

Type

literary emotional

When to use this quote

- dating
- career decisions
- friendship choices
- personal growth

Key Concepts

attachment theory personal responsibility

Questions to Reflect On

- What relationships have you settled for?
- How can you become more aware of true needs?

A Different Perspective

Awareness often comes too late to change past outcomes.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Crossfire](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/crossfire/) [Erotic-romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/erotic-romance/) [Erotica](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/erotica/) [Romance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/romance/) [Wrong people](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wrong-people/)

## Related quotes

> [Would you?” said Gabriel to Will, hotly. “If it was your family?” His lip curled. “Never mind. It’s not as if you know the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cassandra-clare/would-you-said-gabriel-to-will-hotly-if-it-was-your-family-his-lip/)

[Cassandra Clare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cassandra-clare/)

> [“When it came to Gideon, I was more than willing to be devoured.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/when-it-came-to-gideon-i-was-more-than-willing-to-be-devoured/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Oh, Eva." He rubbed his cheek against my damp face. "I must've wished for you so hard and so often you had no choice…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/oh-eva-he-rubbed-his-cheek-against-my-damp-face-i-must-ve-wished-for/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Safe Word: Crossfire”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/safe-word-crossfire/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“For better or worse, he was my soul mate. The other half of me. In many ways, he was my reflection.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/for-better-or-worse-he-was-my-soul-mate-the-other-half-of-me-in-many/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“I’ve got a call on hold to send your way,” she said. “And I hope it’s personal, because holy hell is his voice smokin’…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-ve-got-a-call-on-hold-to-send-your-way-she-said-and-i-hope-it-s/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [The '50 Shades' series is a Cinderella story, where the characters seemingly have no flaws. The 'Crossfire' series is very different in that these…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/the-50-shades-series-is-a-cinderella-story-where-the-characters/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [I don’t need anything else. I get out of bed every morning and face the world because you’re in it.” He turned the corner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-don-t-need-anything-else-i-get-out-of-bed-every-morning-and-face/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [You really couldn't do a PG version of 'Crossfire!' It just wouldn't work.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/you-really-couldn-t-do-a-pg-version-of-crossfire-it-just-wouldn-t-work/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“If you’re going to give him a second chance, I should get one, too.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/if-you-re-going-to-give-him-a-second-chance-i-should-get-one-too/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Why?” He frowned. “You know there’s no one else for either of us. What are you waiting for?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/why-he-frowned-you-know-there-s-no-one-else-for-either-of-us-what-are/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Gideon: "It's time to discuss what it's going to take to get you beneath me." Eva: "A miracle.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/gideon-it-s-time-to-discuss-what-it-s-going-to-take-to-get-you/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“When I come, I come for you. Because of you and your mouth, hands, and insatiable little cunt. And it’ll be that way for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/when-i-come-i-come-for-you-because-of-you-and-your-mouth-hands-and/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Writing the 'Crossfire' series is deeply personal for me, and I love the whole process of it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/writing-the-crossfire-series-is-deeply-personal-for-me-and-i-love-the/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [The 'Crossfire' demographic is all-encompassing. Age, gender, religion, culture... it doesn't matter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/the-crossfire-demographic-is-all-encompassing-age-gender-religion/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

## More by Sylvia Day

> [There are millions of people who think that romance isn't real writing. But the only person who can make you real, make your books…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/there-are-millions-of-people-who-think-that-romance-isn-t-real/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Eva," she said exasperated. "You should've established a personal style by now-and it shouldn't be sweats!" Monica, Eva Tramell's mother, in "Reflected in You”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/eva-she-said-exasperated-you-should-ve-established-a-personal-style/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [I’ve died and gone to heaven](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-ve-died-and-gone-to-heaven/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Why can men be boys all of their lives, but we women must grow old while we are yet young?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/why-can-men-be-boys-all-of-their-lives-but-we-women-must-grow-old/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“I don't know what the fuck you think you're doing, ace, but this Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde shit ain't cutting it with me.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-don-t-know-what-the-fuck-you-think-you-re-doing-ace-but-this-dr/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [What would I do without you? You're never going to find out.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/what-would-i-do-without-you-you-re-never-going-to-find-out/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“this isn't me running away, I'm just leaving”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/this-isn-t-me-running-away-i-m-just-leaving/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [I love digital books. And I actually started digital-first publishing back in 2005.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-love-digital-books-and-i-actually-started-digital-first-publishing/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“You're the greatest risk I've ever taken. And the greatest reward. -- Gideon to Eva”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/you-re-the-greatest-risk-i-ve-ever-taken-and-the-greatest-reward/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“You're so brave, Eva. So strong and honest. You're a miracle. My miracle.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/you-re-so-brave-eva-so-strong-and-honest-you-re-a-miracle-my-miracle/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Until you, I didn't consider my past as an issue. Yes, it affected certain ways I did things, but everything had its place and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/until-you-i-didn-t-consider-my-past-as-an-issue-yes-it-affected/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [There was always something hidden. Lying in wait to spring up and ruin everything.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/there-was-always-something-hidden-lying-in-wait-to-spring-up-and-ruin/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Doctor." Gideon set one ankle on the opposite knee and settled back, creating a picture of unyielding decisiveness. "The only way I'm keeping my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/doctor-gideon-set-one-ankle-on-the-opposite-knee-and-settled-back/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“there were indeed some shades of pleasure that could be colored only by another hand”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/there-were-indeed-some-shades-of-pleasure-that-could-be-colored-only/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Day One of my life was the day I met you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/day-one-of-my-life-was-the-day-i-met-you/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

[Explore all 440 Sylvia Day quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

## More Crossfire quotes

> [My God! The English language is a form of communication! Conversation isn't just crossfire where you shoot and get shot at! Where you've got…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-roth/my-god-the-english-language-is-a-form-of-communication-conversation/)

[Philip Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-roth/)

> [We woke up one day, and all the sudden Starbucks was in the middle of this political crossfire between the people who want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-schultz/we-woke-up-one-day-and-all-the-sudden-starbucks-was-in-the-middle-of/)

[Howard Schultz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-schultz/)

> [“I was born, in a crossfire hurricane”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sean-cronin/i-was-born-in-a-crossfire-hurricane/)

Sean Cronin

> [I don’t need anything else. I get out of bed every morning and face the world because you’re in it.” He turned the corner…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/i-don-t-need-anything-else-i-get-out-of-bed-every-morning-and-face/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Writing the 'Crossfire' series is deeply personal for me, and I love the whole process of it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/writing-the-crossfire-series-is-deeply-personal-for-me-and-i-love-the/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [There actually have never been many shows as equally balanced as 'Crossfire.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tucker-carlson/there-actually-have-never-been-many-shows-as-equally-balanced-as/)

[Tucker Carlson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tucker-carlson/)

> [The extreme positions of the Crossfire Syndrome require extreme simplification - framing the debate in terms which ignore the real issues.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-crichton/the-extreme-positions-of-the-crossfire-syndrome-require-extreme/)

[Michael Crichton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-crichton/)

> [“When I come, I come for you. Because of you and your mouth, hands, and insatiable little cunt. And it’ll be that way for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/when-i-come-i-come-for-you-because-of-you-and-your-mouth-hands-and/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [ I feel so bad for him \[Bernie Sanders\]. It's really unfortunate that he's been caught in the crossfire here. ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jill-stein/i-feel-so-bad-for-him-bernie-sanders-it-s-really-unfortunate-that-he/)

[Jill Stein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jill-stein/)

> [“Gideon: "It's time to discuss what it's going to take to get you beneath me." Eva: "A miracle.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/gideon-it-s-time-to-discuss-what-it-s-going-to-take-to-get-you/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Why?” He frowned. “You know there’s no one else for either of us. What are you waiting for?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/why-he-frowned-you-know-there-s-no-one-else-for-either-of-us-what-are/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“If you’re going to give him a second chance, I should get one, too.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/if-you-re-going-to-give-him-a-second-chance-i-should-get-one-too/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [Unbreakable is a little bit Starship Troopers and a little bit Esmay Suiza, with a dash of Firefly for flavor. W. C. Bauers gives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dayton-ward/unbreakable-is-a-little-bit-starship-troopers-and-a-little-bit-esmay/)

Dayton Ward

> [You really couldn't do a PG version of 'Crossfire!' It just wouldn't work.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/you-really-couldn-t-do-a-pg-version-of-crossfire-it-just-wouldn-t-work/)

[Sylvia Day](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/)

> [“Un campo minado de palabras no dichas y secretos no compartidos.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/un-campo-minado-de-palabras-no-dichas-y-secretos-no-compartidos/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Browse all 38 Crossfire quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/crossfire/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If I’d known you were out there, I would’ve hunted you down. I wouldn’t have waited a second to find you. But I didn’t know, and I settled for less. So did you. We both wasted ourselves on the wrong people.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Sylvia Day"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i-didn-t-know-you-existed/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Crossfire"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i-didn-t-know-you-existed/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/254/sylvia-day-563_crossfire_what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i_2695302.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If…” — Sylvia Day",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Sylvia Day",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sylvia-day/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“What the hell was I supposed...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i-didn-t-know-you-existed/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sylvia-day/what-the-hell-was-i-supposed-to-do-eva-i-didn-t-know-you-existed/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
