--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: What I didn’t know back then, is that I…" description: "\"“What I didn’t know back then, is that I was cold. I’d turned off the longing, knowing that if I let one bit of weakness in, I’d tumble down that rabbi..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9d/suzanne-palmieri-11031_grief_what-i-didn-t-know-back-then-is-that-i-w_1414027.jpg" --- # What I didn’t know back then, is that I was cold. I’d… ![“What I didn’t know back then, is that I was cold. I’d turned off the longing, knowing that if I let one bit of weakness in, I’d tumble down that rabbit hole of sorrow.” quote by Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9d/suzanne-palmieri-11031_grief_what-i-didn-t-know-back-then-is-that-i-w_1414027.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9d/suzanne-palmieri-11031_grief_what-i-didn-t-know-back-then-is-that-i-w_1414027.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9d/suzanne-palmieri-11031_grief_what-i-didn-t-know-back-then-is-that-i-w_1414027.jpg) > ““What I didn’t know back then, is that I was cold. I’d turned off the longing, knowing that if I let one bit of weakness in, I’d tumble down that rabbit hole of sorrow.”” [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Suppressing longing leads to emotional coldness and deeper sorrow. **In simple terms:** Ignoring desire can cause hidden pain. Key Takeaway Acknowledge and process longing. Themes emotions vulnerability self‑awareness Mood reflective somber Type psychological inspirational When to use this quote - therapy sessions - creative writing - personal journaling - relationship counseling Key Concepts psychology emotional health self‑reflection Questions to Reflect On - What longing are you ignoring? - How can you safely express vulnerability? A Different Perspective Denial may delay healing. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Cold Turned](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/cold-turned-4990217/) [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Longing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/longing/) [Longing Knowing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/longing-knowing-1941305/) [Nostalgia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/nostalgia/) [Turned Longing](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/turned-longing-3329813/) [Weakness Tumble](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/weakness-tumble-4990216/) ## Related quotes > [From everything I wanted us to be, the worst happened: we turned out longing. Honestly? I love you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/from-everything-i-wanted-us-to-be-the-worst-happened-we-turned-out/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Whatever love meant there was some version of it that I felt for Winter. And it didn't matter if he felt that for me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francesca-lia-block/whatever-love-meant-there-was-some-version-of-it-that-i-felt-for/) [Francesca Lia Block](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francesca-lia-block/) > [“And George Farr had the town, the earth, the world to himself and his sorrow. Music came faint as a troubling rumor beneath the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-faulkner/and-george-farr-had-the-town-the-earth-the-world-to-himself-and-his/) [William Faulkner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-faulkner/) > [“It was Christmas Day and Danny the Car Wiper hit the street junksick and broke after seventy-two hours in the precinct jail. It was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-s-burroughs/it-was-christmas-day-and-danny-the-car-wiper-hit-the-street-junksick/) [William S. Burroughs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-s-burroughs/) > [“For within your flesh, deep within the center of your being, is the undaunted, waiting, longing, all-knowing. Is the ready, able, perfect. Within you,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jennifer-delucy/for-within-your-flesh-deep-within-the-center-of-your-being-is-the/) [Jennifer DeLucy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jennifer-delucy/) > [“Songs of longing! And they will resound in my letters, just as they always have, sometimes loudly and sometimes secretly so that you alone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rainer-maria-rilke/songs-of-longing-and-they-will-resound-in-my-letters-just-as-they/) [Rainer Maria Rilke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rainer-maria-rilke/) > [“I slept in the grip of that love, comforted, thinking I should forget my longing within it, knowing that all was somehow well...In the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tosca-lee/i-slept-in-the-grip-of-that-love-comforted-thinking-i-should-forget/) [Tosca Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tosca-lee/) > [If we really face our sadness, we find it speaks with the voice of our deepest longing. And if we face it a little…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/peter-kingsley/if-we-really-face-our-sadness-we-find-it-speaks-with-the-voice-of-our/) [Peter Kingsley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/peter-kingsley/) > [To show a longing for anything that one cannot have, for instance, is not a clever position.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-gilbert/to-show-a-longing-for-anything-that-one-cannot-have-for-instance-is/) [Elizabeth Gilbert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-gilbert/) > [I can negate everything of that part of me that lives on vague nostalgias, except this desire for unity, this longing to solve, this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-camus/i-can-negate-everything-of-that-part-of-me-that-lives-on-vague/) [Albert Camus](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-camus/) > [Longing is like a seed that wrestles in the ground](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emily-dickinson/longing-is-like-a-seed-that-wrestles-in-the-ground/) [Emily Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emily-dickinson/) > [It (taking photographs) is all about longingwithout longing-no pictures at all.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anders-petersen/it-taking-photographs-is-all-about-longingwithout-longing-no-pictures/) [Anders Petersen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anders-petersen/) > [Could it be in longing we are most ourselves?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/li-young-lee/could-it-be-in-longing-we-are-most-ourselves/) [Li-Young Lee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/li-young-lee/) > [Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not liking the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/esther-perel/sometimes-it-has-to-do-with-other-longings-that-are-much-more/) [Esther Perel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/esther-perel/) > [“Haunted by the longing to feel something real, deep and magical; I searched for a shared ecstasy... that's when you came along.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lebo-grand/haunted-by-the-longing-to-feel-something-real-deep-and-magical-i/) [Lebo Grand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lebo-grand/) ## More by Suzanne Palmieri > [“The only problem is the heart is quiet. It takes a very special kind of person to hear what the heart says. Most can't…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/the-only-problem-is-the-heart-is-quiet-it-takes-a-very-special-kind/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“All the Amore siblings had The Sight in varying degrees, and its fickleness got us into trouble sometimes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/all-the-amore-siblings-had-the-sight-in-varying-degrees-and-its/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“You really are a chameleon, aren't you? Fitting in wherever you go. "Aren't we all?" she said...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/you-really-are-a-chameleon-aren-t-you-fitting-in-wherever-you-go-aren/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“Here's a secret to love," she said. "Always make sure that the man loves you just a breath more than you love him." "Oh…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/here-s-a-secret-to-love-she-said-always-make-sure-that-the-man-loves/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“No matter how silly I think it all is, society is still society and we are not free of the burdens of hate.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/no-matter-how-silly-i-think-it-all-is-society-is-still-society-and-we/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“I'm a Lost Witch. Are you a Lost Witch too?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/i-m-a-lost-witch-are-you-a-lost-witch-too/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“A game like sardines is scary, not so much for the hider but for the seekers. It's scary because you lose your companions and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/a-game-like-sardines-is-scary-not-so-much-for-the-hider-but-for-the/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“Truth is worse than soap in the eyes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/truth-is-worse-than-soap-in-the-eyes/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“You can’t heal someone who doesn’t want to get well. You just can’t.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/you-can-t-heal-someone-who-doesn-t-want-to-get-well-you-just-can-t/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“You'll be just fine," he said. "Listen to your heart and mind together, that's the trick. Not one or the other, both.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/you-ll-be-just-fine-he-said-listen-to-your-heart-and-mind-together/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [ “\[P\]eople think that in order for something to be frightening, it has to be dark, musty, and full of cobwebs and secrets. That's a… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/p-eople-think-that-in-order-for-something-to-be-frightening-it-has-to/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“I'm like the moon," he started, "the hidden side of the moon. Not seen because it don't want to be seen. Everyone knows ther's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/i-m-like-the-moon-he-started-the-hidden-side-of-the-moon-not-seen/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“She told us about how some people just had magic built into them. That her family firmly believed somehow, somewhere, at the very moment…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/she-told-us-about-how-some-people-just-had-magic-built-into-them-that/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“Last week you looked at me with love. You wanted to touch me. Last week I was happy. Now? Who are you? I don’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/last-week-you-looked-at-me-with-love-you-wanted-to-touch-me-last-week/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) > [“Spring came slowly to the Bronx with a lot of rain & soft water-color tree blossoms.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-palmieri/spring-came-slowly-to-the-bronx-with-a-lot-of-rain-soft-water-color/) [Suzanne Palmieri](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) [Explore all 62 Suzanne Palmieri quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-palmieri/) ## More Grief quotes > [“...they had lived, they'd lived intensely. But no matter how deeply you live, it comes to this in the end: one of you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-morton/they-had-lived-they-d-lived-intensely-but-no-matter-how-deeply-you/) [Brian Morton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-morton/) > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [You felt a deep sorrow, the kind of melancholy you feel when you're in a beautiful place and the sun is going down](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thrity-umrigar/you-felt-a-deep-sorrow-the-kind-of-melancholy-you-feel-when-you-re-in/) [Thrity Umrigar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thrity-umrigar/) > [... how much of our inner substance is it good for us to give to public griefs? The whole modern tendency to agonize over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-bogan/how-much-of-our-inner-substance-is-it-good-for-us-to-give-to-public/) [Louise Bogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-bogan/) > [You dont choose your life; it chooses you. Theres no point asking why life has reserved certain joys or griefs, you just accept them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/you-dont-choose-your-life-it-chooses-you-theres-no-point-asking-why/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [“When we learn to attribute meaning to the events in our lives, we connect with our Higher Purpose, Higher Wisdom, or Source; we become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-barbara-apollon/when-we-learn-to-attribute-meaning-to-the-events-in-our-lives-we/) [Susan Barbara Apollon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-barbara-apollon/) > [Only to have a grief equal to all these tears!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-rich/only-to-have-a-grief-equal-to-all-these-tears/) [Adrienne Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-rich/) > [Nowadays most people wear black most of the time anyway: go to a literary party and one would imagine everyone there was in perpetual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-weldon/nowadays-most-people-wear-black-most-of-the-time-anyway-go-to-a/) [Fay Weldon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-weldon/) > [Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/suppressed-grief-suffocates-it-rages-within-the-breast-and-is-forced/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [That Woman is in love with her own grief.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-zevin/that-woman-is-in-love-with-her-own-grief/) [Gabrielle Zevin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-zevin/) > [Short time seems long in sorrow's sharp sustaining.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/short-time-seems-long-in-sorrow-s-sharp-sustaining/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [These days grief seems like walking on a frozen river; most of the time he feels safe enough, but there is always that danger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/these-days-grief-seems-like-walking-on-a-frozen-river-most-of-the/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [“You've been my beacon of light in my storm of grief, and I don't know if I could live without you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-ashley/you-ve-been-my-beacon-of-light-in-my-storm-of-grief-and-i-don-t-know/) [Katie Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-ashley/) > [Ancient eyes had stared at me, filled with ancient grief. And something more. Something so alien and unexpected that I'd almost burst into tears.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/ancient-eyes-had-stared-at-me-filled-with-ancient-grief-and-something/) [Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/) > [Meanwhile, the trees were just as green as before; the birds sang and the sun shone as clearly now as ever. The familiar surroundings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/meanwhile-the-trees-were-just-as-green-as-before-the-birds-sang-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) [Browse all 8,012 Grief quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“What I didn’t know back then, is that I was cold. 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