--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But when something like Angelina's murder…" description: "\"“But when something like Angelina's murder happens,\" the doctor told him (Decker), \"it's human nature to assume a bunker mentality. Let's shore up our ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg" --- # But when something like Angelina's murder happens," the… ![“But when something like Angelina's murder happens," the doctor told him (Decker), "it's human nature to assume a bunker mentality. Let's shore up our defenses and put up our guard so that when something like this happens again -- when, not if -- we won't be blindsided. Problem is, we become so…” quote by Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg) > ““But when something like Angelina's murder happens," the doctor told him (Decker), "it's human nature to assume a bunker mentality. Let's shore up our defenses and put up our guard so that when something like this happens again -- when, not if -- we won't be blindsided. Problem is, we become so risk averse, we cut ourselves off from the potentially dangerous things that could bring great happiness and joy. We stop taking chances, and without those sometimes risky chances, there's no way we can win big. Our best case scenario become losing not /too/ badly. /At least no one died/ becomes our mantra. Yes, we're trapped here in this prison that we've made, where we can't possibly be happy, but at least we're not devastated by our loss and our grief.”” [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Excessive fear leads to over‑protection, stifling risk‑taking that can yield great rewards and happiness. **In simple terms:** Being too cautious prevents growth and joy. Key Takeaway Embrace measured risk to achieve big gains. Themes risk fear growth happiness security Mood reflective motivational Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - personal relationships - career choices - creative projects - investment decisions Key Concepts psychology decision theory human behavior Questions to Reflect On - What risks could you take that might improve your life? - How do you balance safety with opportunity? A Different Perspective Too much risk aversion can limit potential and cause stagnation. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) [Happiness And Joy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness-and-joy/) [Human nature](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/human-nature/) [Taking chances](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/taking-chances/) ## Related quotes > [I think a lot of the best ideas come from the grassroots; I'm someone who does not like a bunker mentality and does not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-de-blasio/i-think-a-lot-of-the-best-ideas-come-from-the-grassroots-i-m-someone/) [Bill de Blasio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-de-blasio/) > [I'm someone who does not like a bunker mentality and does not like groupthink.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-de-blasio/i-m-someone-who-does-not-like-a-bunker-mentality-and-does-not-like/) [Bill de Blasio](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-de-blasio/) > [If mass media, social isolation in the suburbs, alienating workplaces and long car commutes create a bunker mentality, the Internet does the opposite.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alex-steffen/if-mass-media-social-isolation-in-the-suburbs-alienating-workplaces/) [Alex Steffen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alex-steffen/) > [The Internet has made some phenomenal breakthroughs that are still only poorly understood in terms of changing people's ideas of us and them. If…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alex-steffen/the-internet-has-made-some-phenomenal-breakthroughs-that-are-still/) [Alex Steffen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alex-steffen/) > [So many companies today, when first confronted by a crisis, go into a bunker mentality. They either say, "No comment," or they lie as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-fink/so-many-companies-today-when-first-confronted-by-a-crisis-go-into-a/) [Steven Fink](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-fink/) > [Remember, every worthwhile venture in life intimate love, friendship, a new business, etc. is scary. These things are inherently risky. They are unsafe. These…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/melchor-lim/remember-every-worthwhile-venture-in-life-intimate-love-friendship-a/) [Melchor Lim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/melchor-lim/) > [Every wrinkle has its story. You must have a lot of stories to tell. Happy 60th Birthday filled with lot of happiness and joy!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/every-wrinkle-has-its-story-you-must-have-a-lot-of-stories-to-tell/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I hope that your day is blessed with happiness and joy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-hope-that-your-day-is-blessed-with-happiness-and-joy/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Wishing both of you a world of happiness and joy on your wedding day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/wishing-both-of-you-a-world-of-happiness-and-joy-on-your-wedding-day/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Off with you! You're a happy fellow, for you'll give happiness and joy to many other people. There is nothing better or greater than…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ludwig-van-beethoven/off-with-you-you-re-a-happy-fellow-for-you-ll-give-happiness-and-joy/) [Ludwig Van Beethoven](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ludwig-van-beethoven/) > [I'm saying it's too late to start over. But starting over brings happiness and joy, and that's always better than sticking to heartache and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirelle-m-latimore/i-m-saying-it-s-too-late-to-start-over-but-starting-over-brings/) Shirelle M Latimore > [“And so silence and ...darkness hold happiness and joy?" he said softly. "Assuredly," she said, "provided one listens to the silence and gazes deeply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-balogh/and-so-silence-and-darkness-hold-happiness-and-joy-he-said-softly/) [Mary Balogh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-balogh/) > [This Easter may the resurrected Lord bring you loads of happiness and joy. Happy Easter to you and your family.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/this-easter-may-the-resurrected-lord-bring-you-loads-of-happiness-and/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [If we lose our sense of humor, then we most certainly have lost our perspective, and therefore our happiness and joy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/senoraroy/if-we-lose-our-sense-of-humor-then-we-most-certainly-have-lost-our/) Senoraroy > [If you abide in the love of Christ, rooted in the faith, you will encounter, even amid setbacks and suffering, the source of true…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pope-benedict-xvi/if-you-abide-in-the-love-of-christ-rooted-in-the-faith-you-will/) [Pope Benedict XVI](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pope-benedict-xvi/) ## More by Suzanne Brockmann > [“So where's my hug.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/so-where-s-my-hug/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“But he didn’t seem surprised to see her. ‘Hey.’ ‘Hey, yourself.’ Okay, that was stupid. Her grandmother used to say Hey, yourself. Great, she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/but-he-didn-t-seem-surprised-to-see-her-hey-hey-yourself-okay-that/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“You have no idea how much I appreciate your friendship,” Jules said. Sam held out several bills. “Yeah, actually I do,” he said. “It’s…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/you-have-no-idea-how-much-i-appreciate-your-friendship-jules-said-sam/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“Colleen glanced up from her conversation with the station-wagon mom and caught him looking at her butt. Help.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/colleen-glanced-up-from-her-conversation-with-the-station-wagon-mom/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [Marriage equality is coming, and not merely to a theater near you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/marriage-equality-is-coming-and-not-merely-to-a-theater-near-you/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“I love her.” Bobby said it aloud, to the door, knowing Wes couldn’t hear him over the sound of his own knocking. “I’m in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/i-love-her-bobby-said-it-aloud-to-the-door-knowing-wes-couldn-t-hear/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“God, I want her in my life,” he said aloud. “What am I going to do, Wes?” No one answered.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/god-i-want-her-in-my-life-he-said-aloud-what-am-i-going-to-do-wes-no/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“Then...you want to tell me what's going on with you and Deck?" Lindsey asked. "Nothing's going on," Tracy started to say, but changed it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/then-you-want-to-tell-me-what-s-going-on-with-you-and-deck-lindsey/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [This wasn't Weirdville, this was fricking Wonderland. Alice here was all grow up, but she was still chowing down on too much of that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/this-wasn-t-weirdville-this-was-fricking-wonderland-alice-here-was/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [Dare, dream, dance, smile, and sing loudly! And have faith that love is an unstoppable force!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/dare-dream-dance-smile-and-sing-loudly-and-have-faith-that-love-is-an/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“Vic, of course, clasped Max’s hand, obviously sizing him up, doing that macho squeeze thing that drove Gina nuts. “He’s younger than I remember,”…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/vic-of-course-clasped-max-s-hand-obviously-sizing-him-up-doing-that/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [I remain convinced that the most valuable use of time for a newly published author is to write a second book that's even better…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/i-remain-convinced-that-the-most-valuable-use-of-time-for-a-newly/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [I really like writing heroes who aren't necessarily 'Hollywood handsome.' Personally, I think men who are self-confident, intelligent, and funny are outrageously attractive -…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/i-really-like-writing-heroes-who-aren-t-necessarily-hollywood/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“/When/ the piano falls, not /if/. Oh, Alyssa. What a way to live. With potential pain and heartbreak lurking around every corner. And the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/when-the-piano-falls-not-if-oh-alyssa-what-a-way-to-live-with/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) > [“Although my elephant is different than yours. Mine's bright purple and I like to lead him around on a leash and introduce him to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/although-my-elephant-is-different-than-yours-mine-s-bright-purple-and/) [Suzanne Brockmann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) [Explore all 181 Suzanne Brockmann quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/) ## More Grief quotes > [“...they had lived, they'd lived intensely. But no matter how deeply you live, it comes to this in the end: one of you will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-morton/they-had-lived-they-d-lived-intensely-but-no-matter-how-deeply-you/) [Brian Morton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-morton/) > [“You must understand the pain and grief of losing someone is nothing more than a function of survival.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steven-cooper/you-must-understand-the-pain-and-grief-of-losing-someone-is-nothing/) [Steven Cooper](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steven-cooper/) > [You felt a deep sorrow, the kind of melancholy you feel when you're in a beautiful place and the sun is going down](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thrity-umrigar/you-felt-a-deep-sorrow-the-kind-of-melancholy-you-feel-when-you-re-in/) [Thrity Umrigar](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thrity-umrigar/) > [... how much of our inner substance is it good for us to give to public griefs? The whole modern tendency to agonize over…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louise-bogan/how-much-of-our-inner-substance-is-it-good-for-us-to-give-to-public/) [Louise Bogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louise-bogan/) > [You dont choose your life; it chooses you. Theres no point asking why life has reserved certain joys or griefs, you just accept them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/you-dont-choose-your-life-it-chooses-you-theres-no-point-asking-why/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [“When we learn to attribute meaning to the events in our lives, we connect with our Higher Purpose, Higher Wisdom, or Source; we become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-barbara-apollon/when-we-learn-to-attribute-meaning-to-the-events-in-our-lives-we/) [Susan Barbara Apollon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-barbara-apollon/) > [Only to have a grief equal to all these tears!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adrienne-rich/only-to-have-a-grief-equal-to-all-these-tears/) [Adrienne Rich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adrienne-rich/) > [Nowadays most people wear black most of the time anyway: go to a literary party and one would imagine everyone there was in perpetual…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fay-weldon/nowadays-most-people-wear-black-most-of-the-time-anyway-go-to-a/) [Fay Weldon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fay-weldon/) > [Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages within the breast, and is forced to multiply its strength.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ovid/suppressed-grief-suffocates-it-rages-within-the-breast-and-is-forced/) [Ovid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ovid/) > [That Woman is in love with her own grief.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-zevin/that-woman-is-in-love-with-her-own-grief/) [Gabrielle Zevin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-zevin/) > [Short time seems long in sorrow's sharp sustaining.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/short-time-seems-long-in-sorrow-s-sharp-sustaining/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [These days grief seems like walking on a frozen river; most of the time he feels safe enough, but there is always that danger…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-nicholls/these-days-grief-seems-like-walking-on-a-frozen-river-most-of-the/) [David Nicholls](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-nicholls/) > [“You've been my beacon of light in my storm of grief, and I don't know if I could live without you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katie-ashley/you-ve-been-my-beacon-of-light-in-my-storm-of-grief-and-i-don-t-know/) [Katie Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katie-ashley/) > [Ancient eyes had stared at me, filled with ancient grief. And something more. Something so alien and unexpected that I'd almost burst into tears.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karen-marie-moning/ancient-eyes-had-stared-at-me-filled-with-ancient-grief-and-something/) [Karen Marie Moning](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karen-marie-moning/) > [Meanwhile, the trees were just as green as before; the birds sang and the sun shone as clearly now as ever. The familiar surroundings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-hardy/meanwhile-the-trees-were-just-as-green-as-before-the-birds-sang-and/) [Thomas Hardy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-hardy/) [Browse all 8,012 Grief quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“But when something like Angelina's murder happens,\" the doctor told him (Decker), \"it's human nature to assume a bunker mentality. Let's shore up our defenses and put up our guard so that when something like this happens again -- when, not if -- we won't be blindsided. Problem is, we become so risk averse, we cut ourselves off from the potentially dangerous things that could bring great happiness and joy. We stop taking chances, and without those sometimes risky chances, there's no way we can win big. Our best case scenario become losing not /too/ badly. /At least no one died/ becomes our mantra. Yes, we're trapped here in this prison that we've made, where we can't possibly be happy, but at least we're not devastated by our loss and our grief.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Suzanne Brockmann" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murder-happens-the-doctor-told-him/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Grief" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murder-happens-the-doctor-told-him/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/41d/suzanne-brockmann-2175_grief_but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murde_947163.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“But when something like Angelina's murder happens,\" the doctor told him (Decker), \"it's human nature to…” — Suzanne Brockmann", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Suzanne Brockmann", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/suzanne-brockmann/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“But when something like Angelina's murder...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murder-happens-the-doctor-told-him/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/suzanne-brockmann/but-when-something-like-angelina-s-murder-happens-the-doctor-told-him/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```