---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: When a woman is convinced that she can…"
description: "\"“When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds her sense of failure each time she sees tha..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg"
---

#  When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence…

![“When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds her sense of failure each time she sees that she can’t regulate her husband’s demands and abuses. In a perverse type of review, she may then ask herself how she could have been so stupid as…” quote by Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg)

> ““When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds her sense of failure each time she sees that she can’t regulate her husband’s demands and abuses. In a perverse type of review, she may then ask herself how she could have been so stupid as to overlook the early warnings. This further diminishes her self-esteem.””

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

A woman's belief she can end marital abuse can backfire, worsening self‑esteem when she cannot control her partner's behavior and blames herself for missed warnings.

**In simple terms:** Self‑blame after failed attempts to stop abuse harms confidence.

Key Takeaway

Recognize external control limits and seek support.

Themes

self‑esteem abuse self‑blame resilience

Mood

anxious hopeful

Type

advice psychological

When to use this quote

- counseling
- support groups
- legal aid
- personal safety planning

Key Concepts

psychology victimology agency

Questions to Reflect On

- How can external support change self‑esteem?
- What steps protect safety without self‑blame?

A Different Perspective

Self‑esteem also depends on external help; personal change alone may be insufficient.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) [Domestic abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/domestic-abuse/) [Failure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/failure/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Physical abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/physical-abuse/) [Stop The Violence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/stop-the-violence/) [Stop Violence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/stop-violence/)

## Related quotes

> [We are working with the office of Civil Rights and Civil Liberties in addressing the challenges with the social media companies to ensure that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alejandro-mayorkas/we-are-working-with-the-office-of-civil-rights-and-civil-liberties-in/)

[Alejandro Mayorkas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alejandro-mayorkas/)

> [There's no violence worse than the violence of Iraq. For the last fifty years Iraq has been living a nightmare of violence and terror.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hassan-blasim/there-s-no-violence-worse-than-the-violence-of-iraq-for-the-last/)

[Hassan Blasim](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hassan-blasim/)

> [I'm Killin' These N-iggas I Swear I'm Tryna Stop The Violence.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lil-wayne/i-m-killin-these-n-iggas-i-swear-i-m-tryna-stop-the-violence/)

[Lil Wayne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lil-wayne/)

> [“Every day, millions of plants are killed by vegetarians. Help stop the violence. Eat a steak.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roque-cole/every-day-millions-of-plants-are-killed-by-vegetarians-help-stop-the/)

[Roque Cole](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roque-cole/)

> [ In Chicago, they've had thousands of shootings, thousands since January 1st \[2016\]. Is this a war-torn country? What are we doing? And we have… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/donald-trump/in-chicago-they-ve-had-thousands-of-shootings-thousands-since-january/)

[Donald Trump](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/donald-trump/)

> [Stop the violence! Can't we all just get along?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-rock/stop-the-violence-can-t-we-all-just-get-along/)

[Chris Rock](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-rock/)

> [“Whenever we kill another person, we also kill a part of ourselves. To be violent, to hate, and to kill are wrong. We fail…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-l-weiss/whenever-we-kill-another-person-we-also-kill-a-part-of-ourselves-to/)

[Brian L. Weiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-l-weiss/)

> [As a kid, there was not much I could do to stop the violence in our home. When I got older, as a father,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darryl-glenn/as-a-kid-there-was-not-much-i-could-do-to-stop-the-violence-in-our/)

[Darryl Glenn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/darryl-glenn/)

> [My administration has been calling upon all the leaders in the - in the Middle East to do everything they can to stop the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-w-bush/my-administration-has-been-calling-upon-all-the-leaders-in-the-in-the/)

[George W. Bush](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-w-bush/)

> [Tunechi be the name , dont ask me how I got it , I'm killin these hoes I swear I'm tryna stop the violence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lil-wayne/tunechi-be-the-name-dont-ask-me-how-i-got-it-i-m-killin-these-hoes-i/)

[Lil Wayne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lil-wayne/)

> [Spoof of : Stop the violence! Imagine world peace!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alla/spoof-of-stop-the-violence-imagine-world-peace/)

[Alla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alla/)

> [No one deserves to be beaten, talked down to and controlled... Stop the Violence!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yaprecia/no-one-deserves-to-be-beaten-talked-down-to-and-controlled-stop-the/)

[YaPrecia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yaprecia/)

> [If you don't like seeing pictures of violence towards animals being posted, you need to help stop the violence, not the pictures.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johnny-depp/if-you-don-t-like-seeing-pictures-of-violence-towards-animals-being/)

[Johnny Depp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johnny-depp/)

> [Let me just say you could end this violence within a very short period of time, have a complete ceasefire - which Iran could…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-f-kerry/let-me-just-say-you-could-end-this-violence-within-a-very-short/)

[John F. Kerry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-f-kerry/)

> [Politicians need to stop the violence because it has become a way of life in Jamaica. It's the thing to do - be violent…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/damian-marley/politicians-need-to-stop-the-violence-because-it-has-become-a-way-of/)

[Damian Marley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/damian-marley/)

## More by Susan Weitzman

> [“Consider these traditional theories of domestic abuse: - Learned helplessness suggest that abused women learn to become helpless under abusive conditions; they are powerless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/consider-these-traditional-theories-of-domestic-abuse-learned/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“Canadian researcher Donald Dutton . . has written that marital work with a man who has a history of relationship violence may be a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/canadian-researcher-donald-dutton-has-written-that-marital-work-with/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“As she breaks the silence, the upscale abused wife begins to feel affirmed and validated. The rationalizations she once relied on to sustain her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/as-she-breaks-the-silence-the-upscale-abused-wife-begins-to-feel/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“Once this bubble of self-deception is burst and the mask that shielded her and others from what she wished to ignore is lifted, it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/once-this-bubble-of-self-deception-is-burst-and-the-mask-that/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“Julia's fears of coming forward with the violence were based on anticipated as well as actual responses from friends and acquaintances. I also recognized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/julia-s-fears-of-coming-forward-with-the-violence-were-based-on/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“When others witness or comment on abusive behaviors, the little voice that the upscale abused wife once heard inside her and ignored or muffled…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-others-witness-or-comment-on-abusive-behaviors-the-little-voice/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

> [“But if he is angry at the world for doing him harm, why does he take it out on his loving partner? Couldn’t he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/but-if-he-is-angry-at-the-world-for-doing-him-harm-why-does-he-take/)

[Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

[Explore all 8 Susan Weitzman quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/)

## More Abuse quotes

> [I wrote when I was a young teen, but I didn't put an eye on the available markets until I was seventeen. The next…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reed/i-wrote-when-i-was-a-young-teen-but-i-didn-t-put-an-eye-on-the/)

[Robert Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reed/)

> [Amongst the financial Twitterati, the term 'muppets' has come to describe any client used and abused by some financial predator. I've adopted the term…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barry-ritholtz/amongst-the-financial-twitterati-the-term-muppets-has-come-to/)

[Barry Ritholtz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barry-ritholtz/)

> [Being nice is okay,but don't allow anybody to abuse it...try to fight for your self when you know your on the right way...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-nice-is-okay-but-don-t-allow-anybody-to-abuse-it-try-to-fight/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Build a bridge over shame by teaching kids about sexual abuse. Give them a chance to run to us should they encounter it. Be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-byers-ruch/build-a-bridge-over-shame-by-teaching-kids-about-sexual-abuse-give/)

[Carolyn Byers Ruch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-byers-ruch/)

> [It is sure that those are most desirous of honour or glory who cry out loudest of its abuse and the vanity of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/baruch-spinoza/it-is-sure-that-those-are-most-desirous-of-honour-or-glory-who-cry/)

[Baruch Spinoza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/baruch-spinoza/)

> [“The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-dsouza/the-sole-reason-i-stand-to-open-it-up-now-is-that-lots-of-people-who/)

[Patricia Dsouza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-dsouza/)

> [Democracy must be built through open societies that share information. When there is information, there is enlightenment. When there is debate, there are solutions.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/atifete-jahjaga/democracy-must-be-built-through-open-societies-that-share-information/)

[Atifete Jahjaga](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/atifete-jahjaga/)

> [I have a theory that all abuse, no matter what kind of abuse it is, is foremost an assault on the mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tara-westover/i-have-a-theory-that-all-abuse-no-matter-what-kind-of-abuse-it-is-is/)

[Tara Westover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tara-westover/)

> [“Blaming therapy, social work and other caring professions for the confabulation of testimony of 'satanic ritual abuse' legitimated a programme of political and social…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/blaming-therapy-social-work-and-other-caring-professions-for-the/)

[Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/)

> [Finally, the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-cumming/finally-the-scariest-thing-about-abuse-of-any-shape-or-form-is-in-my/)

[Alan Cumming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-cumming/)

> [“Research on organised abuse emphasises the diversity of organised abuse cases, and the ways in which serious forms of child maltreatment cluster in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/research-on-organised-abuse-emphasises-the-diversity-of-organised/)

[Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/)

> [“Stand up for yourself. Never give any one permission to abuse you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/stand-up-for-yourself-never-give-any-one-permission-to-abuse-you/)

[Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/)

> [All governments should be pressured to correct their abuses of human rights.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-stallman/all-governments-should-be-pressured-to-correct-their-abuses-of-human/)

[Richard Stallman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-stallman/)

> [“Words are free. It does not mean you should abuse them. Be kind with them. They will mirror your actions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hadinet-tekie/words-are-free-it-does-not-mean-you-should-abuse-them-be-kind-with/)

[Hadinet Tekie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hadinet-tekie/)

> [My illness is one often characterized by dramatic overspending - in my case through frenzied shopping sprees, credit card abuse, excessive hoarding of unnecessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-behrman/my-illness-is-one-often-characterized-by-dramatic-overspending-in-my/)

[Andy Behrman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-behrman/)

[Browse all 3,113 Abuse quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds her sense of failure each time she sees that she can’t regulate her husband’s demands and abuses. In a perverse type of review, she may then ask herself how she could have been so stupid as to overlook the early warnings. This further diminishes her self-esteem.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Susan Weitzman"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-stop-the-violence-in-her/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Abuse"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-stop-the-violence-in-her/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/73e/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-s_613465.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds…” — Susan Weitzman",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Susan Weitzman",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“When a woman is convinced that...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-stop-the-violence-in-her/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-stop-the-violence-in-her/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
