--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: As children, because of our dependency…" description: "\"“As children, because of our dependency, we experience a sense of being powerless in a world of powerful people. If our home environments are unpleasan..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54e/susan-forward-4980_children_as-children-because-of-our-dependency-we_327562.jpg" --- # As children, because of our dependency, we experience a… ![“As children, because of our dependency, we experience a sense of being powerless in a world of powerful people. If our home environments are unpleasant or painful, we defend ourselves by secretly promising ourselves that when we grow up we will do things better than our parents did. However…” quote by Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54e/susan-forward-4980_children_as-children-because-of-our-dependency-we_327562.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54e/susan-forward-4980_children_as-children-because-of-our-dependency-we_327562.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/54e/susan-forward-4980_children_as-children-because-of-our-dependency-we_327562.jpg) > ““As children, because of our dependency, we experience a sense of being powerless in a world of powerful people. If our home environments are unpleasant or painful, we defend ourselves by secretly promising ourselves that when we grow up we will do things better than our parents did. However, because we know only what we learned as children, as adults we continue to seek out experiences and relationships that offer the comfort of familiarity. So, despite our heroic promises to do things differently, we often end up duplicating our childhood situations and relationships.”” [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. We often repeat childhood patterns because familiar pain feels safer than unknown change. **In simple terms:** We copy our past relationships. Key Takeaway Recognize and break familiar cycles. Themes family dynamics psychology repetition growth Mood reflective somber Type advice psychological When to use this quote - therapeutic counseling - personal relationships - parenting - relationship building Key Concepts attachment theory self‑sabotage intergenerational trauma Questions to Reflect On - What familiar patterns do you repeat? - How can you create new, healthier experiences? A Different Perspective Changing habits requires confronting uncomfortable emotions. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Childhood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/childhood/) [Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Home environment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/home-environment/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Powerful people](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/powerful-people/) ## Related quotes > [I believe that parents need to make nutrition education a priority in their home environment. It's crucial for good health and longevity to instill…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cat-cora/i-believe-that-parents-need-to-make-nutrition-education-a-priority-in/) [Cat Cora](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cat-cora/) > [“But there was a cost. Being near Ethan was just... incendiary. Part animosity, part ridiculous chemistry, neither conducive to a peaceful home environment. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chloe-neill/but-there-was-a-cost-being-near-ethan-was-just-incendiary-part/) [Chloe Neill](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chloe-neill/) > [The character of a child is formed largely during the first twelve years of his life. He spends 16 times as many waking hours…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-o-mckay/the-character-of-a-child-is-formed-largely-during-the-first-twelve/) [David O. McKay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-o-mckay/) > [“The home environment can undo a lot you try to do at school. That's why we've lowered the kindergarten age year after year until…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-bradbury/the-home-environment-can-undo-a-lot-you-try-to-do-at-school-that-s/) [Ray Bradbury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-bradbury/) > [If your home environment is good and peaceful and easy, your life is better and easier.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lori-greiner/if-your-home-environment-is-good-and-peaceful-and-easy-your-life-is/) [Lori Greiner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lori-greiner/) > [“What scientists haven’t realized until recently is that these risk factors have an upside. In other words, the sensitivities and the strengths are a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-cain/what-scientists-haven-t-realized-until-recently-is-that-these-risk/) [Susan Cain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-cain/) > [Sunday nights, we have dinner together, and we play games on game night; once a year, we get away to ski - when you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lori-loughlin/sunday-nights-we-have-dinner-together-and-we-play-games-on-game-night/) [Lori Loughlin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lori-loughlin/) > [“Though culture and home environment play important roles in the overall shaping of a person, we have learned that children have an inborn tendency…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-wagele/though-culture-and-home-environment-play-important-roles-in-the/) Elizabeth Wagele > [I grew up in a home environment where I wasn't getting esteem for anything I did.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ben-affleck/i-grew-up-in-a-home-environment-where-i-wasn-t-getting-esteem-for/) [Ben Affleck](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ben-affleck/) > [There needs to be the support and help around you, even when you may have an unhealthy home environment.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-redford/there-needs-to-be-the-support-and-help-around-you-even-when-you-may/) [James Redford](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-redford/) > [The home environment can undo a lot you try to do at school.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ray-bradbury/the-home-environment-can-undo-a-lot-you-try-to-do-at-school/) [Ray Bradbury](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ray-bradbury/) > [To me, when you're at a hotel and your home environment is ultimately dictated by somebody else, I always find that a little bit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/matt-bomer/to-me-when-you-re-at-a-hotel-and-your-home-environment-is-ultimately/) [Matt Bomer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/matt-bomer/) > [“Why shall we talk? To provide the right amount of clarity between family members in their home environment, and to spread the ambiance of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maryam-abdullah-alnaymi/why-shall-we-talk-to-provide-the-right-amount-of-clarity-between/) [Maryam Abdullah Alnaymi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maryam-abdullah-alnaymi/) > [Excellent outcomes with much lower intervention rates are achieved at home births. This may be because the overuse of interventions in hospital births introduces…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henci-goer/excellent-outcomes-with-much-lower-intervention-rates-are-achieved-at/) [Henci Goer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henci-goer/) > [I was raised in just about as perfect a home environment as you could ever imagine.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-nantz/i-was-raised-in-just-about-as-perfect-a-home-environment-as-you-could/) [Jim Nantz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-nantz/) ## More by Susan Forward > [“Instead of promoting healthy development, they unconsciously undermine it, often with the belief that they are acting in their child’s best interest.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/instead-of-promoting-healthy-development-they-unconsciously-undermine/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [Criticism is the fountainhead of control.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/criticism-is-the-fountainhead-of-control/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“It’s amazing how people can change behind closed doors.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/it-s-amazing-how-people-can-change-behind-closed-doors/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“The initial disappointment for the misogynist usually occurs early in the relationship. However, because there is so much excitement and romance going on, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/the-initial-disappointment-for-the-misogynist-usually-occurs-early-in/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Reality Check His lying is not contigent on who you are or what you do. His lying is not your fault. Lying is his…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/reality-check-his-lying-is-not-contigent-on-who-you-are-or-what-you/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Many misogynists use this method of turning the tables to deflect blame from themselves. They may say: "You are too sensitive"; "You're overreacting"; "You…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/many-misogynists-use-this-method-of-turning-the-tables-to-deflect/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Children expect different things from each parent. 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Instead of raising…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/some-misogynists-do-not-resort-to-the-obvious-cruelty-of-scare/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Children from high-drama households often grow up with the idea that tension is an integral part of love. Therefore, the girl who grows up…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/children-from-high-drama-households-often-grow-up-with-the-idea-that/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Anger is a normal human emotion and all children experience it to some degree, but many parents have difficulty dealing with it. Often they…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/anger-is-a-normal-human-emotion-and-all-children-experience-it-to/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [When your lover is a liar, you and he have a lot in common, you're both lying to you!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/when-your-lover-is-a-liar-you-and-he-have-a-lot-in-common-you-re-both/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Women in troubled marriages frequently try to work out their problems through their children. Whether a woman does this through the extremes of overwhelming…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/women-in-troubled-marriages-frequently-try-to-work-out-their-problems/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“Inherent in his fear of this dependency is the equally dreadful fear that she will leave him. His terrors of being alone, of being…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/inherent-in-his-fear-of-this-dependency-is-the-equally-dreadful-fear/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) > [“It is a fear that must be defended against at all costs. In an effort to quell his anxiety, he tries to gain control…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-forward/it-is-a-fear-that-must-be-defended-against-at-all-costs-in-an-effort/) [Susan Forward](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) [Explore all 102 Susan Forward quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-forward/) ## More Childhood quotes > [“Children's lives are always beginning and adults' lives are always ending. Or is it the opposite? Your childhood is always ending and your adult…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alison-espach/children-s-lives-are-always-beginning-and-adults-lives-are-always/) [Alison Espach](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alison-espach/) > [“From childhood’s hour I have not been As others were—I have not seen As others saw—I could not bring My passions from a common…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edgar-allan-poe/from-childhood-s-hour-i-have-not-been-as-others-were-i-have-not-seen/) [Edgar Allan Poe](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edgar-allan-poe/) > [We were so poor as kids. I didn't even see a bathtub, running water, hot water, commode - we didn't have any of that.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/phil-robertson/we-were-so-poor-as-kids-i-didn-t-even-see-a-bathtub-running-water-hot/) [Phil Robertson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/phil-robertson/) > [I had a rough upbringing. Group homes. Foster homes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-shamrock/i-had-a-rough-upbringing-group-homes-foster-homes/) [Frank Shamrock](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-shamrock/) > [When I talk about my childhood I used to say it as if it was scripted and I'd make jokes because it was a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kerry-katona/when-i-talk-about-my-childhood-i-used-to-say-it-as-if-it-was-scripted/) [Kerry Katona](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kerry-katona/) > [Every man remembers his childhood as a kind of mythical age, just as every nation's childhood is its mythical age.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/giacomo-leopardi/every-man-remembers-his-childhood-as-a-kind-of-mythical-age-just-as/) [Giacomo Leopardi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/giacomo-leopardi/) > [It's a very familiar type of place where people either go to their house on the lake or they get together in different places.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-carell/it-s-a-very-familiar-type-of-place-where-people-either-go-to-their/) [Steve Carell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-carell/) > [Ideal for the child and society in the best of times, Rudolf Steiner's brilliant process of education is critically needed and profoundly relevant now…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-chilton-pearce/ideal-for-the-child-and-society-in-the-best-of-times-rudolf-steiner-s/) [Joseph Chilton Pearce](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joseph-chilton-pearce/) > [Downstairs in my house, I have a museum room. I keep all of my awards down there, and childhood photos, and even all the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-kelly/downstairs-in-my-house-i-have-a-museum-room-i-keep-all-of-my-awards/) [R. Kelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-kelly/) > [Childhood is Last Chance Gulch for happiness. After that, you know too much.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-stoppard/childhood-is-last-chance-gulch-for-happiness-after-that-you-know-too/) [Tom Stoppard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-stoppard/) > [On paper, it looks rough, but I had a great childhood.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samantha-morton/on-paper-it-looks-rough-but-i-had-a-great-childhood/) [Samantha Morton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samantha-morton/) > [Let positive, strong, helpful thoughts enter into your brains from very childhood. Lay yourselves open to these thoughts, and not to weakening and paralysing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/swami-vivekananda/let-positive-strong-helpful-thoughts-enter-into-your-brains-from-very/) [Swami Vivekananda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/swami-vivekananda/) > [I always knew that I was kind of bored; the regular life of a child didn't fit me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christina-ricci/i-always-knew-that-i-was-kind-of-bored-the-regular-life-of-a-child/) [Christina Ricci](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christina-ricci/) > [Children are not a zoo of entertainingly exotic creatures, but an array of mirrors in which the human predicament leaps out at us.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-updike/children-are-not-a-zoo-of-entertainingly-exotic-creatures-but-an/) [John Updike](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-updike/) > [I'm not sure I would have ever started to draw, let alone write, if my childhood hadn't been so happy. It was a mixture…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tove-jansson/i-m-not-sure-i-would-have-ever-started-to-draw-let-alone-write-if-my/) [Tove Jansson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tove-jansson/) [Browse all 5,837 Childhood quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/childhood/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“As children, because of our dependency, we experience a sense of being powerless in a world of powerful people. If our home environments are unpleasant or painful, we defend ourselves by secretly promising ourselves that when we grow up we will do things better than our parents did. However, because we know only what we learned as children, as adults we continue to seek out experiences and relationships that offer the comfort of familiarity. 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