--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I was thinking that if it really was my…" description: "\"“I was thinking that if it really was my fault, if every reaction could be traced to an action before, then at the very beginning would be me at the ca..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ad/shirley-marr-32565_parenting_i-was-thinking-that-if-it-really-was-my_319954.jpg" --- # I was thinking that if it really was my fault, if every… ![“I was thinking that if it really was my fault, if every reaction could be traced to an action before, then at the very beginning would be me at the canteen queue with my twenty-dollar note instead of my packed lunch. In turn I could blame my mother for not caring enough and maybe I could blame my…” quote by Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ad/shirley-marr-32565_parenting_i-was-thinking-that-if-it-really-was-my_319954.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ad/shirley-marr-32565_parenting_i-was-thinking-that-if-it-really-was-my_319954.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7ad/shirley-marr-32565_parenting_i-was-thinking-that-if-it-really-was-my_319954.jpg) > ““I was thinking that if it really was my fault, if every reaction could be traced to an action before, then at the very beginning would be me at the canteen queue with my twenty-dollar note instead of my packed lunch. In turn I could blame my mother for not caring enough and maybe I could blame my father for making my mum stop caring. Maybe all this was supposed to happen. It had been happening all along. It was too hard to try and stop it now. In a twisted way, there was cold comfort in that.”” [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. We often blame external factors while ignoring personal responsibility for outcomes. **In simple terms:** We blame others instead of ourselves. Key Takeaway Accept personal agency in life’s events. Themes responsibility psychology determinism Mood reflective thoughtful Type philosophical introspective When to use this quote - career decisions - family dynamics - moral choices Key Concepts self‑attribution causality existentialism Questions to Reflect On - What would change if you owned your role? - How does self‑blame affect mental health? A Different Perspective Over‑emphasis on external blame can hinder growth. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) ## Related quotes > [Things just break sometimes. Maybe we should blame that third person we became, that personality we shared together. Maybe it's fault because you're a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/things-just-break-sometimes-maybe-we-should-blame-that-third-person/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [A foolish heart will call on you to toss your dreams away, then turn around and blame you for the way you went astray.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/grateful-dead/a-foolish-heart-will-call-on-you-to-toss-your-dreams-away-then-turn/) [Grateful Dead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/grateful-dead/) > [“As the third evening approached, Gabriel looked up blearily as two people entered the room. His parents. The sight of them infused him with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lisa-kleypas/as-the-third-evening-approached-gabriel-looked-up-blearily-as-two/) [Lisa Kleypas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lisa-kleypas/) > [We are taught you must blame your father, your sisters, your brothers, the school, the teachers - but never blame yourself. It's never your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katharine-hepburn/we-are-taught-you-must-blame-your-father-your-sisters-your-brothers/) [Katharine Hepburn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katharine-hepburn/) > [A son breaks or builds,you cant blame his father for everything he does, so why do we blame god for whatever happens in our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/senoraroy/a-son-breaks-or-builds-you-cant-blame-his-father-for-everything-he/) Senoraroy > [“Maybe your right. Maybe I should blame myself… Who the hell needs that?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nana-mary-roseanne/maybe-your-right-maybe-i-should-blame-myself-who-the-hell-needs-that/) Nana Mary Roseanne > [“Look out!! Ha! Now you've done it! Now you've broken a lamp, and you've got no one to blame it on but yourself!" "Maybe…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-m-schulz/look-out-ha-now-you-ve-done-it-now-you-ve-broken-a-lamp-and-you-ve/) [Charles M. Schulz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-m-schulz/) > [So now after all is said and done, maybe I'm the one to blame but to think that you could be the one...Well it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jojo/so-now-after-all-is-said-and-done-maybe-i-m-the-one-to-blame-but-to/) [Jojo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jojo/) > [I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joan-rivers/i-blame-my-mother-for-my-poor-sex-life-all-she-told-me-was-the-man/) [Joan Rivers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joan-rivers/) > [“Blame my mother," Neil said. "She named me." "How is she doing, by the way?" Riko asked.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nora-sakavic/blame-my-mother-neil-said-she-named-me-how-is-she-doing-by-the-way/) [Nora Sakavic](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nora-sakavic/) > [I blame my mother for nothing, but forgive her for everything.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mary-j-blige/i-blame-my-mother-for-nothing-but-forgive-her-for-everything/) [Mary J. Blige](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mary-j-blige/) > [“If division and negitivity is overcoming goodness and if darkness is overtaking the light...don't blame mother nature. She's just basking in her majestic beauty…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/timothy-pina/if-division-and-negitivity-is-overcoming-goodness-and-if-darkness-is/) [Timothy Pina](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/timothy-pina/) > [“You can blame your mother, and she can blame hers. Leastways sooner or later it's the fault of somebody who's dead.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lionel-shriver/you-can-blame-your-mother-and-she-can-blame-hers-leastways-sooner-or/) [Lionel Shriver](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lionel-shriver/) > [“You try every trick in the book to keep her. You write her letters. You drive her to work. You quote Neruda. You compose…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/junot-diaz/you-try-every-trick-in-the-book-to-keep-her-you-write-her-letters-you/) [Junot Díaz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/junot-diaz/) > [The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/albert-ellis/the-best-years-of-your-life-are-the-ones-in-which-you-decide-your/) [Albert Ellis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/albert-ellis/) ## More by Shirley Marr > [“I walked up to the window, raised my palm and pressed it against the pane. It left a bloodied handprint. Through the red shape—my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/i-walked-up-to-the-window-raised-my-palm-and-pressed-it-against-the/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“I want to grow up and do something cool with my life, such as build an orphanage in a third world country like all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/i-want-to-grow-up-and-do-something-cool-with-my-life-such-as-build-an/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“My uniform felt like a costume. I put on a fresh coat of black nail polish. I twisted up a tube of Revlon Red…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/my-uniform-felt-like-a-costume-i-put-on-a-fresh-coat-of-black-nail/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“I grabbed Lexi’s tousled head and kissed her hair. She smelt like John-Paul Gaultier and blood.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/i-grabbed-lexi-s-tousled-head-and-kissed-her-hair-she-smelt-like-john/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“Neil once told me you had to become a monster so that you didn't become the victim of one instead. I don't care what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/neil-once-told-me-you-had-to-become-a-monster-so-that-you-didn-t/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“I swapped my heart for a bargaining chip a long time ago. And here I am turning it over and over again in my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/i-swapped-my-heart-for-a-bargaining-chip-a-long-time-ago-and-here-i/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“If you're hoping to party like it's 1999 because Prince told you the world was going to end in 2000, then I'm sorry to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/if-you-re-hoping-to-party-like-it-s-1999-because-prince-told-you-the/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“You don’t give your mum enough credit for raising you, Elle. Look at you. Teenage sweetheart with a sugar shell and strychnine centre. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/you-don-t-give-your-mum-enough-credit-for-raising-you-elle-look-at/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“Brian, maybe you are right after all. It was a plan. It had a beginning, middle and an end. We knew what we wanted…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/brian-maybe-you-are-right-after-all-it-was-a-plan-it-had-a-beginning/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“So it is just you and your friends then.” “Yes. Is that so hard to believe?” Is it because we’re girls? I want to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/so-it-is-just-you-and-your-friends-then-yes-is-that-so-hard-to/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“Neil said to me once that in times of desperation, you have to force yourself to make a decision. It's your choice, he said.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/neil-said-to-me-once-that-in-times-of-desperation-you-have-to-force/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“There is no ending to this story because, as I've realised, stories don't have endings, only beginnings.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/there-is-no-ending-to-this-story-because-as-i-ve-realised-stories-don/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“What the hell. Was he going to bring out a gramophone or Morse code machine too?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/what-the-hell-was-he-going-to-bring-out-a-gramophone-or-morse-code/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) > [“You're so mean,' I said. 'You're like one of those people who upload pictures of themselves where they look really hot and the other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shirley-marr/you-re-so-mean-i-said-you-re-like-one-of-those-people-who-upload/) [Shirley Marr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) [Explore all 15 Shirley Marr quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shirley-marr/) ## More Blame quotes > [“I have to blame myself for not finding any way of reaching him, but I can't feel that either Ruth or I had anything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wallace-stegner/i-have-to-blame-myself-for-not-finding-any-way-of-reaching-him-but-i/) [Wallace Stegner](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wallace-stegner/) > [Me mum used to always have the radio on - even now she has it on in every room. Me girlfriend sort of blames…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karl-pilkington/me-mum-used-to-always-have-the-radio-on-even-now-she-has-it-on-in/) [Karl Pilkington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karl-pilkington/) > [I like to praise and reward loudly, to blame quietly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/catherine-the-great/i-like-to-praise-and-reward-loudly-to-blame-quietly/) [Catherine the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/catherine-the-great/) > [Some of the things that I said I hated to say, but blame yourself mother fucker you made it this way.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jedi-mind-tricks/some-of-the-things-that-i-said-i-hated-to-say-but-blame-yourself/) [Jedi Mind Tricks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jedi-mind-tricks/) > [Holy shadows of the dead, I'm not to blame for your cruel and bitter fate, but the accursed rivalry which brought sister nations and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-the-great/holy-shadows-of-the-dead-i-m-not-to-blame-for-your-cruel-and-bitter/) [Alexander the Great](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-the-great/) > [“In places where government priorities and market imperatives create a world so capricious that to help a neighbor is to risk your ability to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katherine-boo/in-places-where-government-priorities-and-market-imperatives-create-a/) [Katherine Boo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katherine-boo/) > [“Stop Blaming Others For Your Own Actions”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexis-g-roldan/stop-blaming-others-for-your-own-actions/) [Alexis G. Roldan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexis-g-roldan/) > [We know from this book entitled... What is it? Surrendered? Succumbed? I can never remember the title perform. And we learn from this book…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rush-limbaugh/we-know-from-this-book-entitled-what-is-it-surrendered-succumbed-i/) [Rush Limbaugh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rush-limbaugh/) > [I don't blame anyone .. I did this to myself .. It's my fault .. Everything is my FAULT ...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nurnizz95/i-don-t-blame-anyone-i-did-this-to-myself-it-s-my-fault-everything-is/) Nurnizz95 > [“They would congratulate themselves every morning on keeping their integrity, and blame themselves each night for that missed opportunity.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/they-would-congratulate-themselves-every-morning-on-keeping-their/) [Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/) > [I try to live my life where I end up at a point where I have no regrets. So I try to choose the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darren-aronofsky/i-try-to-live-my-life-where-i-end-up-at-a-point-where-i-have-no/) [Darren Aronofsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/darren-aronofsky/) > [How come you don't feel that magic in the air? I guess I knew you'll never be there. I guess I knew you never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/how-come-you-don-t-feel-that-magic-in-the-air-i-guess-i-knew-you-ll/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [I am down mentally. I can't understand how it happened and who is to blame? I don't know why the ground was rolled before…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yeasin-khan/i-am-down-mentally-i-can-t-understand-how-it-happened-and-who-is-to/) Yeasin Khan > [A refusal to admit one's mistake & not accepting responsibility for that mistake by blaming everyone else, is d beginning of one's decline.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/a-refusal-to-admit-one-s-mistake-not-accepting-responsibility-for/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Listen, the guy was not created by coverage from MSNBC and CNN. If you want to blame us for making Donald Trump president because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/katy-tur/listen-the-guy-was-not-created-by-coverage-from-msnbc-and-cnn-if-you/) [Katy Tur](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/katy-tur/) Browse all 3,779 Blame quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I was thinking that if it really was my fault, if every reaction could be traced to an action before, then at the very beginning would be me at the canteen queue with my twenty-dollar note instead of my packed lunch. In turn I could blame my mother for not caring enough and maybe I could blame my father for making my mum stop caring. Maybe all this was supposed to happen. It had been happening all along. It was too hard to try and stop it now. 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