---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: The costs of keeping secrets include our…"
description: "\"“The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation due to fear of detection and the ways we shut down inside to avoid feeling the effects of o..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg"
---

#  The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation…

![“The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation due to fear of detection and the ways we shut down inside to avoid feeling the effects of our behavior. We can never afford to be truly seen and known—even by ourselves.” quote by Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg)

> ““The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation due to fear of detection and the ways we shut down inside to avoid feeling the effects of our behavior. We can never afford to be truly seen and known—even by ourselves.””

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Keeping secrets creates isolation and internal shutdown, preventing authentic self‑knowledge and connection.

**In simple terms:** Secrets cause fear and isolation.

Key Takeaway

Practice openness and self‑acceptance.

Themes

secrecy isolation self‑awareness vulnerability

Mood

reflective cautious

Type

philosophical motivational

When to use this quote

- personal relationships
- therapy
- team dynamics
- leadership

Key Concepts

psychology trust emotional health

Questions to Reflect On

- What fears keep you secretive?
- How can you safely share your true self?

A Different Perspective

Openness can expose one to judgment or hurt.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Fear](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fear/) [Inspiration](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspiration/) [Isolation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/isolation/) [Keeping secrets](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/keeping-secrets/) [Loneliness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loneliness/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Meditation](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/meditation/) [Mindfulness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mindfulness/) [Real love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/real-love/) [Real love quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/real-love-quotes/) [Secret](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/secret/) [Secrets](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/secrets/)

## Related quotes

> [“The more we practice mindfulness, the more alert we become to the cost of keeping secrets.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-more-we-practice-mindfulness-the-more-alert-we-become-to-the-cost/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Keeping secrets is a consequential act for all involved.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/keeping-secrets-is-a-consequential-act-for-all-involved/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“To imagine the way we think is the singular causative agent of all we go through is to practice cruelty toward ourselves.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/to-imagine-the-way-we-think-is-the-singular-causative-agent-of-all-we/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“No connection is always easy or free of strife, no matter how many minutes a day we meditate. It’s how we relate to conflict,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/no-connection-is-always-easy-or-free-of-strife-no-matter-how-many/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Real Love may run on a lower voltage, but it’s also more grounded & sustainable.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/real-love-may-run-on-a-lower-voltage-but-it-s-also-more-grounded/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“The skills available to us through mindfulness make it possible to bring love to our connections with others.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-skills-available-to-us-through-mindfulness-make-it-possible-to/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“One foundation of loving relationships is curiosity, keeping open to the idea that we have much to learn even about those we have been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/one-foundation-of-loving-relationships-is-curiosity-keeping-open-to/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Telling the story, acknowledging what has happened and how you feel, is often a necessary part of forgiveness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/telling-the-story-acknowledging-what-has-happened-and-how-you-feel-is/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“The combination of realizing our distinctiveness along with our unity is seeing interdependence.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-combination-of-realizing-our-distinctiveness-along-with-our-unity/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“We learn from conflicts only when we are willing to do so.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/we-learn-from-conflicts-only-when-we-are-willing-to-do-so/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“When we contemplate the miracle of embodied life, we begin to partner with our bodies in a kinder way.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/when-we-contemplate-the-miracle-of-embodied-life-we-begin-to-partner/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“As we explore new ways of loving and being loved by others, we need to equip ourselves with open, pliant minds; we need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/as-we-explore-new-ways-of-loving-and-being-loved-by-others-we-need-to/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Asking questions is an opportunity for creativity and personal expression, both for the person asking and the person answering.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/asking-questions-is-an-opportunity-for-creativity-and-personal/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Even when we do our very best to treat those close to us with utmost respect and understanding, conflict happens. That’s life. That’s human…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/even-when-we-do-our-very-best-to-treat-those-close-to-us-with-utmost/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“How we traverse the space between us when conflict arises has a profound effect on the health and longevity of our relationships.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/how-we-traverse-the-space-between-us-when-conflict-arises-has-a/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

## More by Sharon Salzberg

> [Some things hurt, you know, and there's pain. But we magnify the suffering of it often, I think, by our reactions.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/some-things-hurt-you-know-and-there-s-pain-but-we-magnify-the/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“How we traverse the space between us when conflict arises has a profound effect on the health and longevity of our relationships.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/how-we-traverse-the-space-between-us-when-conflict-arises-has-a/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Even when we do our very best to treat those close to us with utmost respect and understanding, conflict happens. That’s life. That’s human…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/even-when-we-do-our-very-best-to-treat-those-close-to-us-with-utmost/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Loving ourselves calls us to give up the illusion that we can control everything and focuses us on building our inner resource of resilience.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/loving-ourselves-calls-us-to-give-up-the-illusion-that-we-can-control/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [In order to do anything about the suffering of the world we must have the strength to face it without turning away.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/in-order-to-do-anything-about-the-suffering-of-the-world-we-must-have/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“When we believe a wounding story, our whole world is diminished.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/when-we-believe-a-wounding-story-our-whole-world-is-diminished/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“The paradigm for our relationships is formed from our earliest experiences and is actually hardwired into our neurological and emotional network.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-paradigm-for-our-relationships-is-formed-from-our-earliest/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [Vulnerability in the face of constant change is what we share, whatever our present condition.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/vulnerability-in-the-face-of-constant-change-is-what-we-share/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“Asking questions is an opportunity for creativity and personal expression, both for the person asking and the person answering.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/asking-questions-is-an-opportunity-for-creativity-and-personal/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [Compassion isn't morose; it's something replenishing and opening; that's why it makes us happy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/compassion-isn-t-morose-it-s-something-replenishing-and-opening-that/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“When we open our hearts to the breadth of our experiences, we learn to tune into our needs, unique perceptions, thoughts & feelings”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/when-we-open-our-hearts-to-the-breadth-of-our-experiences-we-learn-to/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“As we explore new ways of loving and being loved by others, we need to equip ourselves with open, pliant minds; we need to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/as-we-explore-new-ways-of-loving-and-being-loved-by-others-we-need-to/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [Even in the midst of devastation, something within us always points the way to freedom.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/even-in-the-midst-of-devastation-something-within-us-always-points/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“It's important to investigate the nature of anger because it is such a powerful energy and can be so destructive. When we can face…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/it-s-important-to-investigate-the-nature-of-anger-because-it-is-such/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

> [“When we contemplate the miracle of embodied life, we begin to partner with our bodies in a kinder way.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/when-we-contemplate-the-miracle-of-embodied-life-we-begin-to-partner/)

[Sharon Salzberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

[Explore all 473 Sharon Salzberg quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/)

## More Fear quotes

> [This may sound strange, but although I feel like I know everything about my characters, the brand of shampoo they use, how many cavities…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gail-honeyman/this-may-sound-strange-but-although-i-feel-like-i-know-everything/)

[Gail Honeyman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gail-honeyman/)

> [“That horrible stinging sensation returned, the muscles behind my eyes straining as the first tear began to fall. “I’m scared, too. For eighteen months…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/devon-ashley/that-horrible-stinging-sensation-returned-the-muscles-behind-my-eyes/)

[Devon Ashley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/devon-ashley/)

> [“...Often that which most we fear births the resolve that spurs us on to altitudes we could not have achieved, had we continued walking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-t-anderson/often-that-which-most-we-fear-births-the-resolve-that-spurs-us-on-to/)

[M.T. Anderson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-t-anderson/)

> [What an incredible drug fear is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/what-an-incredible-drug-fear-is/)

[Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/)

> [“Anything that you find yourself worrying about regularly may find you suddenly wanting unrealistic changes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nagisa-tatsumi/anything-that-you-find-yourself-worrying-about-regularly-may-find-you/)

Nagisa Tatsumi

> [“We all know how the thing we secretly fear is not a secret at all but the open and eternal thing that predicts its…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/don-delillo/we-all-know-how-the-thing-we-secretly-fear-is-not-a-secret-at-all-but/)

[Don DeLillo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/don-delillo/)

> [When you're scared - and I mean really scared, not just hearing a noise in the night, or standing toe to toe with someone…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alexander-gordon-smith/when-you-re-scared-and-i-mean-really-scared-not-just-hearing-a-noise/)

[Alexander Gordon Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alexander-gordon-smith/)

> [“I had nowhere to go and did not wish to be seen by anyone for fear they would recognize my sadness and so for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patrick-dewitt/i-had-nowhere-to-go-and-did-not-wish-to-be-seen-by-anyone-for-fear/)

[Patrick deWitt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patrick-dewitt/)

> [It's easier to change a law than an age-old mentality. Deep down, many prejudices, many hostilities, many fears persist. But if we take a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dacia-maraini/it-s-easier-to-change-a-law-than-an-age-old-mentality-deep-down-many/)

[Dacia Maraini](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dacia-maraini/)

> [“Snip off the little worries and expressions of worry” like little branches atop a tall tree.28 If you are truly worried, sharing your concerns…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-sanders/snip-off-the-little-worries-and-expressions-of-worry-like-little/)

[Tim Sanders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-sanders/)

> [“Fear and desire for pleasure. Aggressiveness comes out of fear, predominantly, and sexuality predominantly out of the other. But they mix in the middle.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marilyn-french/fear-and-desire-for-pleasure-aggressiveness-comes-out-of-fear/)

[Marilyn French](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marilyn-french/)

> [“Carrie Fisher. “Stay afraid, but do it anyway.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gabrielle-union/carrie-fisher-stay-afraid-but-do-it-anyway/)

[Gabrielle Union](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gabrielle-union/)

> [“Yes, the issue was courage. It always had been, even as a kid. Things scared him. He couldn't help it. Noise scared him, dark…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-o-brien/yes-the-issue-was-courage-it-always-had-been-even-as-a-kid-things/)

[Tim O'Brien](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-o-brien/)

> [Don't be afraid of hard work. Nothing worthwhile comes easily. Don't let others discourage you or tell you that you can't do it. In…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gertrude-b-elion/don-t-be-afraid-of-hard-work-nothing-worthwhile-comes-easily-don-t/)

[Gertrude B. Elion](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gertrude-b-elion/)

> [Let me tell you that atheism has never painted a masterpiece. Atheism has never dispelled fear. Atheism has never healed a disease; faith in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-hagee/let-me-tell-you-that-atheism-has-never-painted-a-masterpiece-atheism/)

[John Hagee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-hagee/)

[Browse all 35,569 Fear quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fear/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation due to fear of detection and the ways we shut down inside to avoid feeling the effects of our behavior. We can never afford to be truly seen and known—even by ourselves.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Sharon Salzberg"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our-growing-isolation-due-to/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Fear"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our-growing-isolation-due-to/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/006/sharon-salzberg-562_fear_the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our_2179349.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“The costs of keeping secrets include our growing isolation due to fear of detection and the ways we shut…” — Sharon Salzberg",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Sharon Salzberg",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-salzberg/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“The costs of keeping secrets include...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our-growing-isolation-due-to/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-salzberg/the-costs-of-keeping-secrets-include-our-growing-isolation-due-to/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```