--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I have heard about the civilized, the…" description: "\"I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on talk, elegant and honest, rational. But and I are savages.\" — Sharon Olds" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg" --- # I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on… ![“I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on talk, elegant and honest, rational. But and I are savages.” quote by Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg) > “I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on talk, elegant and honest, rational. But and I are savages.” [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Even in refined societies, primal instincts persist, highlighting a tension between civility and savagery. **In simple terms:** Civilized life still has wild instincts. Key Takeaway Acknowledge our inner savagery. Themes civilization instinct duality Mood reflective poignant Type poetic philosophical When to use this quote - family life - urban living - conflict resolution Key Concepts human nature psychology Questions to Reflect On - What primal urges surface in daily life? - How can we integrate instinct with civility? A Different Perspective Idealizing civility may ignore real needs. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Elegant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/elegant/) [Honest](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/honest/) [Marriage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/marriage/) [Running](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/running/) [Savages](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/savages/) ## Related quotes > [Have you ever heard one civilized person whose opinion you respect, at any time, anywhere, in any civilized country anywhere, say the good new…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cleveland-amory/have-you-ever-heard-one-civilized-person-whose-opinion-you-respect-at/) [Cleveland Amory](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cleveland-amory/) > [I am speaking to those among you who have retained some sovereign shred of their soul, unsold and unstamped: '- to the order of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ayn-rand/i-am-speaking-to-those-among-you-who-have-retained-some-sovereign/) [Ayn Rand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ayn-rand/) > [“Atheism remains the only honest, rational and moral position to hold.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/al-stefanelli/atheism-remains-the-only-honest-rational-and-moral-position-to-hold/) [Al Stefanelli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/al-stefanelli/) > [It is by far the most elegant worship, hardly excepting the Greek mythology. What with incense, pictures, statues, altars, shrines, relics, and the real…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lord-byron/it-is-by-far-the-most-elegant-worship-hardly-excepting-the-greek/) [Lord Byron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lord-byron/) > [In mathematics, if I find a new approach to a problem, another mathematician might claim that he has a better, more elegant solution. In…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emanuel-lasker/in-mathematics-if-i-find-a-new-approach-to-a-problem-another/) [Emanuel Lasker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emanuel-lasker/) > [We endeavour to employ only symmetrical figures, such as should not only be an aid to reasoning, through the sense of sight, but should…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-venn/we-endeavour-to-employ-only-symmetrical-figures-such-as-should-not/) John Venn > [The acute experience of great beauty readily evokes a nameless yearning for something more than earth can offer. Elegant splendor reawakens our spirit's aching…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-dubay/the-acute-experience-of-great-beauty-readily-evokes-a-nameless/) [Thomas Dubay](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-dubay/) > [Coming from Haiti and growing up in Brooklyn, there's a lot of European influence when I get dressed up. I wear a lot of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wyclef-jean/coming-from-haiti-and-growing-up-in-brooklyn-there-s-a-lot-of/) [Wyclef Jean](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wyclef-jean/) > [Not taking yourself seriously is one of the most elegant things in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rick-owens/not-taking-yourself-seriously-is-one-of-the-most-elegant-things-in/) [Rick Owens](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rick-owens/) > [White makes your house more peaceful and elegant.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sana-khan/white-makes-your-house-more-peaceful-and-elegant/) [Sana Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sana-khan/) > [When you first start off trying to solve a problem, the first solutions you come up with are very complex, and most people stop…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-jobs/when-you-first-start-off-trying-to-solve-a-problem-the-first/) [Steve Jobs](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-jobs/) > [My dad had a personal style which was very attractive. It was quite reserved and quite elegant, and it was infectious.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-nighy/my-dad-had-a-personal-style-which-was-very-attractive-it-was-quite/) [Bill Nighy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-nighy/) > [Even if I did have, you know, a 'Sports Illustrated' body, I'd still wear elegant clothes.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/adele/even-if-i-did-have-you-know-a-sports-illustrated-body-i-d-still-wear/) [Adele](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/adele/) > [This is a time in my life where I'm gonna behave like an elegant human being. Or not.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elaine-stritch/this-is-a-time-in-my-life-where-i-m-gonna-behave-like-an-elegant/) [Elaine Stritch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elaine-stritch/) > [I swam with my first shark in the 1980s. I was 20 miles off the coast of Rhode Island, working with a group of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-skerry/i-swam-with-my-first-shark-in-the-1980s-i-was-20-miles-off-the-coast/) [Brian Skerry](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-skerry/) ## More by Sharon Olds > [Poems come from ordinary experiences and objects, I think. Out of memory - a dress I lent my daughter on her way back to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/poems-come-from-ordinary-experiences-and-objects-i-think-out-of/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [There are some fine books and essays about that. Lewis Hyde has written about alcoholism and poets and the role that society gives its…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/there-are-some-fine-books-and-essays-about-that-lewis-hyde-has/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [I'm not asking a poem to carry a lot of rocks in its pockets. Just being an ordinary observer and liver and feeler and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-m-not-asking-a-poem-to-carry-a-lot-of-rocks-in-its-pockets-just/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [“How do they do it, the ones who make love without love? How do they come to the come to the come to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/how-do-they-do-it-the-ones-who-make-love-without-love-how-do-they/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [She'd crack A joke sharp as a tin lid Hot from the teeth of the can-opener, And cackle her crack-corn laugh.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/she-d-crack-a-joke-sharp-as-a-tin-lid-hot-from-the-teeth-of-the-can/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [If I wrote in a sonnet form, I would be distorting. Or if I had some great new idea for line breaks and I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/if-i-wrote-in-a-sonnet-form-i-would-be-distorting-or-if-i-had-some/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [Many poets write books. They'll tell you: Well, I've got my next book, but there are two poems I need to write, one about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/many-poets-write-books-they-ll-tell-you-well-i-ve-got-my-next-book/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [“as if languagelessness was a step up, in evolution, from the chatter of consciousness.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/as-if-languagelessness-was-a-step-up-in-evolution-from-the-chatter-of/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [Maybe we can use a metaphor for it, out of dance. I think for many years I was aware of the need, in dance…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/maybe-we-can-use-a-metaphor-for-it-out-of-dance-i-think-for-many/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [Who wants to put together something that will bear some relationship to the vision or memory or experience or story or idea or dream…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/who-wants-to-put-together-something-that-will-bear-some-relationship/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [“I put my arms around a trunk and squeezed it, then I lay down on my father's grave.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-put-my-arms-around-a-trunk-and-squeezed-it-then-i-lay-down-on-my/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [“...the liquor like fire in his hand”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/the-liquor-like-fire-in-his-hand/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [I'm probably so out of it at my age that I don't know what people think.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-m-probably-so-out-of-it-at-my-age-that-i-don-t-know-what-people/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [“Some people think I should be over my ex by now — maybe I thought I might have been over him more by now.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/some-people-think-i-should-be-over-my-ex-by-now-maybe-i-thought-i/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) > [Maybe in order to understand sex fully/one has to risk being destroyed by it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/maybe-in-order-to-understand-sex-fully-one-has-to-risk-being/) [Sharon Olds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) [Explore all 78 Sharon Olds quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/) ## More Civilized quotes > [ That country \[Carthage\] was rapidly sinking into the state of barbarism from whence it had been raised by the Phoenician colonies and Roman laws;… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/edward-gibbon/that-country-carthage-was-rapidly-sinking-into-the-state-of-barbarism/) [Edward Gibbon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/edward-gibbon/) > [Be neither too early in the fashion, nor too long out of it, nor too precisely in it; what custom hath civilized is become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/francis-quarles/be-neither-too-early-in-the-fashion-nor-too-long-out-of-it-nor-too/) [Francis Quarles](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/francis-quarles/) > [Wine is one of the most civilized things in the world and one of the most natural things of the world that has been…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ernest-hemingway/wine-is-one-of-the-most-civilized-things-in-the-world-and-one-of-the/) [Ernest Hemingway](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ernest-hemingway/) > [Civilized nations are ones that simply can't endure wrongs or injustice except at home](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joseph-anderson/civilized-nations-are-ones-that-simply-can-t-endure-wrongs-or/) Joseph Anderson > [Our guiding principle was that design is neither an intellectual nor a material affair, but simply an integral part of the stuff of life,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walter-gropius/our-guiding-principle-was-that-design-is-neither-an-intellectual-nor/) [Walter Gropius](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walter-gropius/) > [War is not civilized.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/talib-kweli/war-is-not-civilized/) [Talib Kweli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/talib-kweli/) > [For it is an absurdity to call a country civilized in which a decent and industrious man, laboriously mastering a trade which is valuble…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/h-l-mencken/for-it-is-an-absurdity-to-call-a-country-civilized-in-which-a-decent/) [H. L. Mencken](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/h-l-mencken/) > [No people is wholly civilized where a distinction is drawn between stealing an office and stealing a purse.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/theodore-roosevelt/no-people-is-wholly-civilized-where-a-distinction-is-drawn-between/) [Theodore Roosevelt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/theodore-roosevelt/) > [Mine was, as it were, the connecting link between wild and cultivated fields; as some states are civilized, and others half-civilized, and others savage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-david-thoreau/mine-was-as-it-were-the-connecting-link-between-wild-and-cultivated/) [Henry David Thoreau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-david-thoreau/) > [The military mind is indeed a menace. Old-fashioned futurity that sees only men fighting and dying in smoke and fire; hears nothing more civilized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sean-o-casey/the-military-mind-is-indeed-a-menace-old-fashioned-futurity-that-sees/) [Sean O'Casey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sean-o-casey/) > [As long as there are prisons, police, armies, navies; we are not civilized. When the Earth joins together and uses the Earth intelligently, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jacque-fresco/as-long-as-there-are-prisons-police-armies-navies-we-are-not/) [Jacque Fresco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jacque-fresco/) > [We're all intrigued, in our civilized world that we live in, and curious about how we would get on, on an undiscovered island that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-hiddleston/we-re-all-intrigued-in-our-civilized-world-that-we-live-in-and/) [Tom Hiddleston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-hiddleston/) > [When passions and appetites are stronger than the intellect, men are savages; when the intellect governs the passions, when the passions are servants, men…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-green-ingersoll/when-passions-and-appetites-are-stronger-than-the-intellect-men-are/) [Robert Green Ingersoll](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-green-ingersoll/) > [The malady of civilized man is his knowledge of death. The good artist, like the wise man, addresses himself to life and invests with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gore-vidal/the-malady-of-civilized-man-is-his-knowledge-of-death-the-good-artist/) [Gore Vidal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gore-vidal/) > [Savage peoples are ruled by passion, civilized peoples by the mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carl-von-clausewitz/savage-peoples-are-ruled-by-passion-civilized-peoples-by-the-mind/) [Carl von Clausewitz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carl-von-clausewitz/) Browse all 1,043 Civilized quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on talk, elegant and honest, rational. But and I are savages.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Sharon Olds" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-marriages-run-on-talk-elegant/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Civilized" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-marriages-run-on-talk-elegant/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dbf/sharon-olds-8682_civilized_i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-mar_1303482.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I have heard about the civilized, the marriages run on talk, elegant and honest, rational. But and I are…” — Sharon Olds", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Sharon Olds", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon-olds/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "I have heard about the civilized,...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-marriages-run-on-talk-elegant/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon-olds/i-have-heard-about-the-civilized-the-marriages-run-on-talk-elegant/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```