--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: When survivors get to the point where the…" description: "\"“When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives over pleasin..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e6/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-th_1332436.jpg" --- # When survivors get to the point where the relationships… ![“When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives over pleasing the abusers. Those are the most extreme situations. When they do occur, No Contact is the only option for a life of recovery. One” quote by Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e6/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-th_1332436.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e6/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-th_1332436.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e6/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-th_1332436.jpg) > ““When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives over pleasing the abusers. Those are the most extreme situations. When they do occur, No Contact is the only option for a life of recovery.   One”” [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. When relationships become toxic, victims often stay to please abusers; recognizing this is vital for recovery; No Contact is essential for healing. **In simple terms:** Staying in harmful relationships harms you; cutting ties helps recovery. Key Takeaway Choose safety over appeasement. Themes abuse recovery boundaries Mood determined hopeful Type advice motivational When to use this quote - domestic violence counseling - support groups - personal therapy - legal protection Key Concepts psychology trauma self‑care Questions to Reflect On - What fears keep you in a harmful relationship? - How can you build a support network for No Contact? A Different Perspective No Contact may be impossible without resources or safety plans. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) [Abusers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusers/) [Abusers Extreme](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusers-extreme-4476014/) [Extreme Situations](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/extreme-situations-1457714/) [Life Recovery](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-recovery-3159647/) [Survivors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/survivors/) ## Related quotes > [“Some abusers on the middle-to-high end of the toxicity spectrum have absolutely no reservations about damaging survivors in any way possible, even to their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-abusers-on-the-middle-to-high-end-of-the-toxicity-spectrum-have/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Tenderness from empaths will be used against them time and time again by psychological abusers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/tenderness-from-empaths-will-be-used-against-them-time-and-time-again/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“When an abuser gaslights, he or she sets up situations to make the target doubt their own memories and assessments of situations. 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Calof](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-l-calof/) ## More by Shannon Thomas > [“By the time survivors are compelled to leave their psychologically abusive relationships, they do not see any other viable option but to leave. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/by-the-time-survivors-are-compelled-to-leave-their-psychologically/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“This is because in the legalistic church, God (or pronounced “Gawd” if you’re in the southern regions of the country) is coming to smite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/this-is-because-in-the-legalistic-church-god-or-pronounced-gawd-if/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“A psychological abuser will find a survivor’s emotional soft spots and exploit them for control and entertainment.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-psychological-abuser-will-find-a-survivor-s-emotional-soft-spots/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Toxic people are great actors. They will utilize whichever props are available to maintain control in the relationship.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-are-great-actors-they-will-utilize-whichever-props-are/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“If we have a high level of emotional capacity, it predisposes us to stay in abusive environments longer. That is not a great thing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/if-we-have-a-high-level-of-emotional-capacity-it-predisposes-us-to/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“A Sociopath will run you over, scold you for being in their way, and have a smirk because secretly they get entertainment out of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-sociopath-will-run-you-over-scold-you-for-being-in-their-way-and/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Toxic people absolutely refuse to have normal human flaws and weaknesses. They do not see themselves as average people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-absolutely-refuse-to-have-normal-human-flaws-and/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Some people wonder if abusers can feel love or affection for their targets. The answer to that depends on your own definition of love.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-people-wonder-if-abusers-can-feel-love-or-affection-for-their/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Some are quietly deteriorating the person’s self-esteem through the emotional game of abandonment. Being present physically but checked out emotionally is not a marriage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-are-quietly-deteriorating-the-person-s-self-esteem-through-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Denial is a powerful human component that cannot be ignored in the context of psychological abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/denial-is-a-powerful-human-component-that-cannot-be-ignored-in-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Tenderness from empaths will be used against them time and time again by psychological abusers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/tenderness-from-empaths-will-be-used-against-them-time-and-time-again/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“When an abuser gaslights, he or she sets up situations to make the target doubt their own memories and assessments of situations. 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This point is often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/it-is-a-source-of-power-and-entertainment-for-a-toxic-person-to/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) [Explore all 120 Shannon Thomas quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) ## More Abuse quotes > [I wrote when I was a young teen, but I didn't put an eye on the available markets until I was seventeen. The next…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reed/i-wrote-when-i-was-a-young-teen-but-i-didn-t-put-an-eye-on-the/) [Robert Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reed/) > [Amongst the financial Twitterati, the term 'muppets' has come to describe any client used and abused by some financial predator. 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Be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-byers-ruch/build-a-bridge-over-shame-by-teaching-kids-about-sexual-abuse-give/) [Carolyn Byers Ruch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-byers-ruch/) > [It is sure that those are most desirous of honour or glory who cry out loudest of its abuse and the vanity of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/baruch-spinoza/it-is-sure-that-those-are-most-desirous-of-honour-or-glory-who-cry/) [Baruch Spinoza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/baruch-spinoza/) > [“The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-dsouza/the-sole-reason-i-stand-to-open-it-up-now-is-that-lots-of-people-who/) [Patricia Dsouza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-dsouza/) > [Democracy must be built through open societies that share information. When there is information, there is enlightenment. 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They will mirror your actions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hadinet-tekie/words-are-free-it-does-not-mean-you-should-abuse-them-be-kind-with/) [Hadinet Tekie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hadinet-tekie/) > [My illness is one often characterized by dramatic overspending - in my case through frenzied shopping sprees, credit card abuse, excessive hoarding of unnecessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-behrman/my-illness-is-one-often-characterized-by-dramatic-overspending-in-my/) [Andy Behrman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-behrman/) [Browse all 3,113 Abuse quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives over pleasing the abusers. Those are the most extreme situations. 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