---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Normal people don’t play all the toxic…"
description: "\"“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.”\" — Shannon Thomas"
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg"
---

#  Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological…

![“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.” quote by Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg)

> ““Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.””

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Survivors often internalize blame because toxic abusers manipulate narratives, making self‑blame a common initial response.

**In simple terms:** Abusers’ games cause survivors to blame themselves.

Key Takeaway

Challenge self‑blame, seek support.

Themes

survivorship psychology abuse

Mood

empathetic empowering

Type

educational supportive

When to use this quote

- counseling
- support groups
- education

Key Concepts

self‑blame toxic dynamics recovery

Questions to Reflect On

- How can survivors reframe self‑blame?
- What support helps break the blame cycle?

A Different Perspective

Self‑blame can hinder healing.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) [Abusers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusers/) [Abusers Survivors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusers-survivors-3028084/) [Games Psychological](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/games-psychological-3028085/) [Normal people](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/normal-people/) [Psychological Abusers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/psychological-abusers-524353/) [Survivors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/survivors/)

## Related quotes

> [“Tenderness from empaths will be used against them time and time again by psychological abusers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/tenderness-from-empaths-will-be-used-against-them-time-and-time-again/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Psychological abusers like people who make them look or feel good.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/psychological-abusers-like-people-who-make-them-look-or-feel-good/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“The important point to remember is that most outwardly expressed emotions of psychological abusers are for a distinct purpose; that is usually to harm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/the-important-point-to-remember-is-that-most-outwardly-expressed/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“psychological abusers damage others – not out of impaired judgement – but because they enjoy the control they gain from abusing people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/psychological-abusers-damage-others-not-out-of-impaired-judgement-but/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Rather than being insecure, psychological abusers are easily offended, consumed with themselves, and want things just their way.   Each”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/rather-than-being-insecure-psychological-abusers-are-easily-offended/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Psychological abusers are known for becoming jealous of any attention not being given to them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/psychological-abusers-are-known-for-becoming-jealous-of-any-attention/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Psychological abusers do not realize that people authentically grown weary of their ridiculousness, find recovery from the abuse, and eventually move on without looking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/psychological-abusers-do-not-realize-that-people-authentically-grown/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Some abusers on the middle-to-high end of the toxicity spectrum have absolutely no reservations about damaging survivors in any way possible, even to their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-abusers-on-the-middle-to-high-end-of-the-toxicity-spectrum-have/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-the-relationships-are-slowly/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Normal people have a hard time comprehending that abusers go to such lengths, but they do.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-have-a-hard-time-comprehending-that-abusers-go-to-such/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [It seems like what happens when we play games is that we go into a psychological state called eustress, or positive stress. It's basically…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-mcgonigal/it-seems-like-what-happens-when-we-play-games-is-that-we-go-into-a/)

[Jane McGonigal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-mcgonigal/)

> [“The ability of the abuser to harm someone close to him or her fits perfectly into the lack of relational attachment that is present…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/the-ability-of-the-abuser-to-harm-someone-close-to-him-or-her-fits/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“If your definition of love is wanting to see another person authentically happy and living a fulfilled life, then the answer is no. Psychological…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/if-your-definition-of-love-is-wanting-to-see-another-person/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Another preoccupation fed into this dynamic relationship between discovery and denial: does sexual abuse actually matter? Should it, in fact, be allowed? After all,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beatrix-campbell/another-preoccupation-fed-into-this-dynamic-relationship-between/)

[Beatrix Campbell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beatrix-campbell/)

> [“Both incest and the Holocaust have been subject to furious denial by perpetrators and other individuals and by highly organised groups such as the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-walker/both-incest-and-the-holocaust-have-been-subject-to-furious-denial-by/)

[Janet Walker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-walker/)

## More by Shannon Thomas

> [“By the time survivors are compelled to leave their psychologically abusive relationships, they do not see any other viable option but to leave. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/by-the-time-survivors-are-compelled-to-leave-their-psychologically/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“This is because in the legalistic church, God (or pronounced “Gawd” if you’re in the southern regions of the country) is coming to smite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/this-is-because-in-the-legalistic-church-god-or-pronounced-gawd-if/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“A psychological abuser will find a survivor’s emotional soft spots and exploit them for control and entertainment.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-psychological-abuser-will-find-a-survivor-s-emotional-soft-spots/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Toxic people are great actors. They will utilize whichever props are available to maintain control in the relationship.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-are-great-actors-they-will-utilize-whichever-props-are/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“If we have a high level of emotional capacity, it predisposes us to stay in abusive environments longer. That is not a great thing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/if-we-have-a-high-level-of-emotional-capacity-it-predisposes-us-to/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“A Sociopath will run you over, scold you for being in their way, and have a smirk because secretly they get entertainment out of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-sociopath-will-run-you-over-scold-you-for-being-in-their-way-and/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Toxic people absolutely refuse to have normal human flaws and weaknesses. They do not see themselves as average people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-absolutely-refuse-to-have-normal-human-flaws-and/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Some people wonder if abusers can feel love or affection for their targets. The answer to that depends on your own definition of love.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-people-wonder-if-abusers-can-feel-love-or-affection-for-their/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Some are quietly deteriorating the person’s self-esteem through the emotional game of abandonment. Being present physically but checked out emotionally is not a marriage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-are-quietly-deteriorating-the-person-s-self-esteem-through-the/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Denial is a powerful human component that cannot be ignored in the context of psychological abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/denial-is-a-powerful-human-component-that-cannot-be-ignored-in-the/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Tenderness from empaths will be used against them time and time again by psychological abusers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/tenderness-from-empaths-will-be-used-against-them-time-and-time-again/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“When an abuser gaslights, he or she sets up situations to make the target doubt their own memories and assessments of situations. This is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/when-an-abuser-gaslights-he-or-she-sets-up-situations-to-make-the/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“I use the term survivor to describe what some might call a victim. I hope you can embrace the word survivor because it is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/i-use-the-term-survivor-to-describe-what-some-might-call-a-victim-i/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“Unraveling the lies and replacing them with truth is at the heart of the recovery journey for survivors of psychological abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/unraveling-the-lies-and-replacing-them-with-truth-is-at-the-heart-of/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

> [“It is a source of power and entertainment for a toxic person to destroy an originally healthy and happy person. This point is often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/it-is-a-source-of-power-and-entertainment-for-a-toxic-person-to/)

[Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

[Explore all 120 Shannon Thomas quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/)

## More Abuse quotes

> [I wrote when I was a young teen, but I didn't put an eye on the available markets until I was seventeen. The next…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reed/i-wrote-when-i-was-a-young-teen-but-i-didn-t-put-an-eye-on-the/)

[Robert Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reed/)

> [Amongst the financial Twitterati, the term 'muppets' has come to describe any client used and abused by some financial predator. I've adopted the term…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barry-ritholtz/amongst-the-financial-twitterati-the-term-muppets-has-come-to/)

[Barry Ritholtz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barry-ritholtz/)

> [Being nice is okay,but don't allow anybody to abuse it...try to fight for your self when you know your on the right way...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-nice-is-okay-but-don-t-allow-anybody-to-abuse-it-try-to-fight/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [“Build a bridge over shame by teaching kids about sexual abuse. Give them a chance to run to us should they encounter it. Be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-byers-ruch/build-a-bridge-over-shame-by-teaching-kids-about-sexual-abuse-give/)

[Carolyn Byers Ruch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-byers-ruch/)

> [It is sure that those are most desirous of honour or glory who cry out loudest of its abuse and the vanity of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/baruch-spinoza/it-is-sure-that-those-are-most-desirous-of-honour-or-glory-who-cry/)

[Baruch Spinoza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/baruch-spinoza/)

> [“The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-dsouza/the-sole-reason-i-stand-to-open-it-up-now-is-that-lots-of-people-who/)

[Patricia Dsouza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-dsouza/)

> [Democracy must be built through open societies that share information. When there is information, there is enlightenment. When there is debate, there are solutions.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/atifete-jahjaga/democracy-must-be-built-through-open-societies-that-share-information/)

[Atifete Jahjaga](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/atifete-jahjaga/)

> [I have a theory that all abuse, no matter what kind of abuse it is, is foremost an assault on the mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tara-westover/i-have-a-theory-that-all-abuse-no-matter-what-kind-of-abuse-it-is-is/)

[Tara Westover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tara-westover/)

> [“Blaming therapy, social work and other caring professions for the confabulation of testimony of 'satanic ritual abuse' legitimated a programme of political and social…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/blaming-therapy-social-work-and-other-caring-professions-for-the/)

[Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/)

> [Finally, the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-cumming/finally-the-scariest-thing-about-abuse-of-any-shape-or-form-is-in-my/)

[Alan Cumming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-cumming/)

> [“Research on organised abuse emphasises the diversity of organised abuse cases, and the ways in which serious forms of child maltreatment cluster in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/research-on-organised-abuse-emphasises-the-diversity-of-organised/)

[Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/)

> [“Stand up for yourself. Never give any one permission to abuse you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/stand-up-for-yourself-never-give-any-one-permission-to-abuse-you/)

[Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/)

> [All governments should be pressured to correct their abuses of human rights.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-stallman/all-governments-should-be-pressured-to-correct-their-abuses-of-human/)

[Richard Stallman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-stallman/)

> [“Words are free. It does not mean you should abuse them. Be kind with them. They will mirror your actions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hadinet-tekie/words-are-free-it-does-not-mean-you-should-abuse-them-be-kind-with/)

[Hadinet Tekie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hadinet-tekie/)

> [My illness is one often characterized by dramatic overspending - in my case through frenzied shopping sprees, credit card abuse, excessive hoarding of unnecessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-behrman/my-illness-is-one-often-characterized-by-dramatic-overspending-in-my/)

[Andy Behrman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-behrman/)

[Browse all 3,113 Abuse quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Shannon Thomas"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Abuse"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/17a/shannon-thomas-3888_normal-people_normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-g_1931908.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially…” — Shannon Thomas",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Shannon Thomas",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“Normal people don’t play all the...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
