--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to…" description: "\"“Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care less, and any exertion of empowerment by a ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg" --- # Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more”… ![“Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care less, and any exertion of empowerment by a survivor will be met with a full-on attack. I want advocates and survivors in the abuse recovery community to recognize that one size does not fit…” quote by Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg) > ““Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care less, and any exertion of empowerment by a survivor will be met with a full-on attack. I want advocates and survivors in the abuse recovery community to recognize that one size does not fit all when it comes to healing.   Let’s”” [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Abusers rarely care about survivors' healing; empowerment can trigger backlash; healing must be personalized. **In simple terms:** Healing isn’t one-size-fits-all. Key Takeaway Tailor support individually. Themes survivor empowerment abuse dynamics healing Mood empathetic supportive Type advocacy recovery When to use this quote - counseling - support groups - legal aid Key Concepts trauma-informed care resilience advocacy Questions to Reflect On - How can you respect a survivor’s pace? - What strategies protect against backlash? A Different Perspective Some may resist empowerment attempts. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) [Survivors](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/survivors/) ## Related quotes > [“Those who support such survivors of abuse often find it difficult to hear the reality of those survivors' lives and experience and are often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laurie-matthew/those-who-support-such-survivors-of-abuse-often-find-it-difficult-to/) [Laurie Matthew](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laurie-matthew/) > [“Survivors of abuse show us the strength of their personal spirit every time they smile.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeanne-mcelvaney/survivors-of-abuse-show-us-the-strength-of-their-personal-spirit/) [Jeanne McElvaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeanne-mcelvaney/) > [“The fact that most perpetrators of organised abuse are men, and that their most intensive and sadistic abuses are visited upon girls and women,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/the-fact-that-most-perpetrators-of-organised-abuse-are-men-and-that/) [Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/) > [“Addiction does not cause partner abuse, and recovery from addiction does not “cure” partner abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lundy-bancroft/addiction-does-not-cause-partner-abuse-and-recovery-from-addiction/) [Lundy Bancroft](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lundy-bancroft/) > [“We live in a world where some psychologists are the most dangerous mental abusers. Take care.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitta-xinindlu/we-live-in-a-world-where-some-psychologists-are-the-most-dangerous/) [Mitta Xinindlu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitta-xinindlu/) > [“By the time survivors are compelled to leave their psychologically abusive relationships, they do not see any other viable option but to leave. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/by-the-time-survivors-are-compelled-to-leave-their-psychologically/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“You can recognize survivors of abuse by their courage. When silence is so very inviting, they step forward and share their truth so others…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeanne-mcelvaney/you-can-recognize-survivors-of-abuse-by-their-courage-when-silence-is/) [Jeanne McElvaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeanne-mcelvaney/) > [“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/normal-people-don-t-play-all-the-toxic-games-psychological-abusers-do/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Through No Contact, survivors can find ever-increasing distance from the malice that almost permanently ruined their lives.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/through-no-contact-survivors-can-find-ever-increasing-distance-from/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Survivors often get to a point in recovery where they can predict the responses of the toxic person.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/survivors-often-get-to-a-point-in-recovery-where-they-can-predict-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“When survivors get to the point where the relationships are slowly killing them, we must talk about why they won’t choose their own lives…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/when-survivors-get-to-the-point-where-the-relationships-are-slowly/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“The important thing to remember is that even if survivors stayed broken for the rest of their lives, the abusers do not. They are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/the-important-thing-to-remember-is-that-even-if-survivors-stayed/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Many survivors will work their way through the first stage of Despair, second stage of Education, third stage of Awakening, and find themselves paralyzed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/many-survivors-will-work-their-way-through-the-first-stage-of-despair/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“I have been known to tell survivors, who are remaining in contact with intensely toxic people, that I cannot continue to work with them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/i-have-been-known-to-tell-survivors-who-are-remaining-in-contact-with/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Some abusers on the middle-to-high end of the toxicity spectrum have absolutely no reservations about damaging survivors in any way possible, even to their…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-abusers-on-the-middle-to-high-end-of-the-toxicity-spectrum-have/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) ## More by Shannon Thomas > [“By the time survivors are compelled to leave their psychologically abusive relationships, they do not see any other viable option but to leave. They…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/by-the-time-survivors-are-compelled-to-leave-their-psychologically/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“This is because in the legalistic church, God (or pronounced “Gawd” if you’re in the southern regions of the country) is coming to smite…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/this-is-because-in-the-legalistic-church-god-or-pronounced-gawd-if/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“A psychological abuser will find a survivor’s emotional soft spots and exploit them for control and entertainment.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-psychological-abuser-will-find-a-survivor-s-emotional-soft-spots/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Toxic people are great actors. They will utilize whichever props are available to maintain control in the relationship.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-are-great-actors-they-will-utilize-whichever-props-are/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“If we have a high level of emotional capacity, it predisposes us to stay in abusive environments longer. That is not a great thing.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/if-we-have-a-high-level-of-emotional-capacity-it-predisposes-us-to/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“A Sociopath will run you over, scold you for being in their way, and have a smirk because secretly they get entertainment out of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/a-sociopath-will-run-you-over-scold-you-for-being-in-their-way-and/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Toxic people absolutely refuse to have normal human flaws and weaknesses. They do not see themselves as average people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/toxic-people-absolutely-refuse-to-have-normal-human-flaws-and/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Some people wonder if abusers can feel love or affection for their targets. The answer to that depends on your own definition of love.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-people-wonder-if-abusers-can-feel-love-or-affection-for-their/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Some are quietly deteriorating the person’s self-esteem through the emotional game of abandonment. Being present physically but checked out emotionally is not a marriage…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/some-are-quietly-deteriorating-the-person-s-self-esteem-through-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Denial is a powerful human component that cannot be ignored in the context of psychological abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/denial-is-a-powerful-human-component-that-cannot-be-ignored-in-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Tenderness from empaths will be used against them time and time again by psychological abusers.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/tenderness-from-empaths-will-be-used-against-them-time-and-time-again/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“When an abuser gaslights, he or she sets up situations to make the target doubt their own memories and assessments of situations. This is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/when-an-abuser-gaslights-he-or-she-sets-up-situations-to-make-the/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“I use the term survivor to describe what some might call a victim. I hope you can embrace the word survivor because it is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/i-use-the-term-survivor-to-describe-what-some-might-call-a-victim-i/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“Unraveling the lies and replacing them with truth is at the heart of the recovery journey for survivors of psychological abuse.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/unraveling-the-lies-and-replacing-them-with-truth-is-at-the-heart-of/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) > [“It is a source of power and entertainment for a toxic person to destroy an originally healthy and happy person. This point is often…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/it-is-a-source-of-power-and-entertainment-for-a-toxic-person-to/) [Shannon Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) [Explore all 120 Shannon Thomas quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/) ## More Abuse quotes > [I wrote when I was a young teen, but I didn't put an eye on the available markets until I was seventeen. The next…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reed/i-wrote-when-i-was-a-young-teen-but-i-didn-t-put-an-eye-on-the/) [Robert Reed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reed/) > [Amongst the financial Twitterati, the term 'muppets' has come to describe any client used and abused by some financial predator. I've adopted the term…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/barry-ritholtz/amongst-the-financial-twitterati-the-term-muppets-has-come-to/) [Barry Ritholtz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/barry-ritholtz/) > [Being nice is okay,but don't allow anybody to abuse it...try to fight for your self when you know your on the right way...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/being-nice-is-okay-but-don-t-allow-anybody-to-abuse-it-try-to-fight/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [“Build a bridge over shame by teaching kids about sexual abuse. Give them a chance to run to us should they encounter it. Be…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carolyn-byers-ruch/build-a-bridge-over-shame-by-teaching-kids-about-sexual-abuse-give/) [Carolyn Byers Ruch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carolyn-byers-ruch/) > [It is sure that those are most desirous of honour or glory who cry out loudest of its abuse and the vanity of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/baruch-spinoza/it-is-sure-that-those-are-most-desirous-of-honour-or-glory-who-cry/) [Baruch Spinoza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/baruch-spinoza/) > [“The sole reason I stand to open it up now is that lots of people who are in pain just like I was, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/patricia-dsouza/the-sole-reason-i-stand-to-open-it-up-now-is-that-lots-of-people-who/) [Patricia Dsouza](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/patricia-dsouza/) > [Democracy must be built through open societies that share information. When there is information, there is enlightenment. When there is debate, there are solutions.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/atifete-jahjaga/democracy-must-be-built-through-open-societies-that-share-information/) [Atifete Jahjaga](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/atifete-jahjaga/) > [I have a theory that all abuse, no matter what kind of abuse it is, is foremost an assault on the mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tara-westover/i-have-a-theory-that-all-abuse-no-matter-what-kind-of-abuse-it-is-is/) [Tara Westover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tara-westover/) > [“Blaming therapy, social work and other caring professions for the confabulation of testimony of 'satanic ritual abuse' legitimated a programme of political and social…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/blaming-therapy-social-work-and-other-caring-professions-for-the/) [Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/) > [Finally, the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alan-cumming/finally-the-scariest-thing-about-abuse-of-any-shape-or-form-is-in-my/) [Alan Cumming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alan-cumming/) > [“Research on organised abuse emphasises the diversity of organised abuse cases, and the ways in which serious forms of child maltreatment cluster in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-salter/research-on-organised-abuse-emphasises-the-diversity-of-organised/) [Michael Salter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-salter/) > [“Stand up for yourself. Never give any one permission to abuse you.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/stand-up-for-yourself-never-give-any-one-permission-to-abuse-you/) [Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/) > [All governments should be pressured to correct their abuses of human rights.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-stallman/all-governments-should-be-pressured-to-correct-their-abuses-of-human/) [Richard Stallman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-stallman/) > [“Words are free. It does not mean you should abuse them. Be kind with them. They will mirror your actions.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hadinet-tekie/words-are-free-it-does-not-mean-you-should-abuse-them-be-kind-with/) [Hadinet Tekie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hadinet-tekie/) > [My illness is one often characterized by dramatic overspending - in my case through frenzied shopping sprees, credit card abuse, excessive hoarding of unnecessary…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-behrman/my-illness-is-one-often-characterized-by-dramatic-overspending-in-my/) [Andy Behrman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-behrman/) [Browse all 3,113 Abuse quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abuse/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care less, and any exertion of empowerment by a survivor will be met with a full-on attack. I want advocates and survivors in the abuse recovery community to recognize that one size does not fit all when it comes to healing.   Let’s”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Shannon Thomas" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-to-a-no-more-point-not-at-all/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Abuse" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-to-a-no-more-point-not-at-all/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/851/shannon-thomas-3888_quote_do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-t_1216800.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care…” — Shannon Thomas", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Shannon Thomas", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shannon-thomas/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "“Do all abusers care if a...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-to-a-no-more-point-not-at-all/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shannon-thomas/do-all-abusers-care-if-a-survivor-gets-to-a-no-more-point-not-at-all/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```