--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Assertiveness is not what you do, it's…" description: "\"Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are!\" — Shakti Gawain" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png" --- # Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are! ![“Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are!” quote by Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png) > “Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are!” [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Emphasizes that confidence is an intrinsic trait, not merely a set of actions. **In simple terms:** Confidence is identity. Key Takeaway Own your assertiveness. Themes self‑identity confidence personal power behavior vs. being Mood empowered determined Type motivational philosophical When to use this quote - leadership meetings - negotiation settings - personal boundaries Key Concepts self‑concept assertiveness inner strength Practical Applications - coaching for self‑esteem - team dynamics training Questions to Reflect On - How does seeing assertiveness as part of self change your approach? - What habits reveal your true confidence? ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Assertiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/assertiveness/) ## Related quotes > [“Be calm; yet assertive. Be meek; yet courageous. Be gentle; yet bold. Be kind; yet strong.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-f-glassman-2/be-calm-yet-assertive-be-meek-yet-courageous-be-gentle-yet-bold-be/) [Charles F Glassman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-f-glassman-2/) > [“Whoa, hello, assertiveness! How lovely to make your acquaintance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-leveen/whoa-hello-assertiveness-how-lovely-to-make-your-acquaintance/) [Tom Leveen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-leveen/) > [If you overcome your fear to ask someone for a date, a raise, or help with a project, that is an act of self-assertiveness.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-branden/if-you-overcome-your-fear-to-ask-someone-for-a-date-a-raise-or-help/) [Nathaniel Branden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-branden/) > [“I have what it takes to get the work done.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/i-have-what-it-takes-to-get-the-work-done/) [Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/) > [The duty we owe ourselves is greater than that we owe others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louisa-may-alcott/the-duty-we-owe-ourselves-is-greater-than-that-we-owe-others/) [Louisa May Alcott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louisa-may-alcott/) > [Once you have a major success with assertiveness, you learn that it's a much healthier path than being a doormat to the insensitive folks.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doreen-virtue/once-you-have-a-major-success-with-assertiveness-you-learn-that-it-s/) [Doreen Virtue](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doreen-virtue/) > [“Some people’s self-esteem was secretly improved when they discovered that their then-lovers had killed themselves over them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/some-people-s-self-esteem-was-secretly-improved-when-they-discovered/) [Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) > [If you are going to have to play defense all the time, you cannot have the kind of ingenuity, assertiveness, independence, and intelligence which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arlen-specter/if-you-are-going-to-have-to-play-defense-all-the-time-you-cannot-have/) [Arlen Specter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arlen-specter/) > [ \[After her 18-day disappearance in 1974:\] I love my husband very, very much, but he didn't ask me when he ran for mayor and… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/angela-alioto/after-her-18-day-disappearance-in-1974-i-love-my-husband-very-very/) [Angela Alioto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/angela-alioto/) > [“Every great achiever is inspired by a great mentor.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/every-great-achiever-is-inspired-by-a-great-mentor/) [Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/) > [I had received my first establishment grants in response to applications filed the year before. To the pages of baffling forms I had simply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/twyla-tharp/i-had-received-my-first-establishment-grants-in-response-to/) [Twyla Tharp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/twyla-tharp/) > [“It’s a fact that you’re going to have a different opinion or view on certain topics or issues. You need stand your ground by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-barbarulo-author-god-s-healing-hands-allow-god-to-reshape-your-soul/it-s-a-fact-that-you-re-going-to-have-a-different-opinion-or-view-on/) [Michael Barbarulo: Author God's Healing Hands: Allow God To Reshape Your Soul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-barbarulo-author-god-s-healing-hands-allow-god-to-reshape-your-soul/) > [I think naturally, if you're an actor, there's a high level of assertiveness that you need to have to survive this business. There's boldness…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bryan-cranston/i-think-naturally-if-you-re-an-actor-there-s-a-high-level-of/) [Bryan Cranston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bryan-cranston/) > [Being assertive in the home does not produce any smiling faces, but it does bring out a few tongues.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wes-fesler/being-assertive-in-the-home-does-not-produce-any-smiling-faces-but-it/) [Wes Fesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wes-fesler/) > [I think the opposite version of me is the one we don't see, which is there are tens of thousands of outrageously successful businesses…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-vaynerchuk/i-think-the-opposite-version-of-me-is-the-one-we-don-t-see-which-is/) [Gary Vaynerchuk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-vaynerchuk/) ## More by Shakti Gawain > [Practice following your intuition in everyday things, trusting your gut feelings moment by moment and acting on them as best you can. As you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/practice-following-your-intuition-in-everyday-things-trusting-your/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Many times people can access that being stage more fully and more easily if at first you are actually doing something. If you run,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/many-times-people-can-access-that-being-stage-more-fully-and-more/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Our life is a reflection of what we believe we deserve. As we deepen our acceptance of and open ourselves to the Infinite love…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/our-life-is-a-reflection-of-what-we-believe-we-deserve-as-we-deepen/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [An affirmation is a strong, positive statement that something is already so.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/an-affirmation-is-a-strong-positive-statement-that-something-is/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [When you truly give up trying to be whole through others, you end up receiving what you always wanted from others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/when-you-truly-give-up-trying-to-be-whole-through-others-you-end-up/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [I believe that everybody needs to tell their story - to be heard, to be seen, to be acknowledged, to be understood. We all…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/i-believe-that-everybody-needs-to-tell-their-story-to-be-heard-to-be/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Receiving and giving are opposite energies that are inextricably linked together in the natural flow of life, like inhaling and exhaling. If one aspect…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/receiving-and-giving-are-opposite-energies-that-are-inextricably/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [I do believe that one of the major ways that we're out of alignment with our souls is in our disconnect from nature. I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/i-do-believe-that-one-of-the-major-ways-that-we-re-out-of-alignment/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [We shouldn't ignore any guidance that comes from the mind - we should listen to our minds AND balance mental messages with intuitive messages.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/we-shouldn-t-ignore-any-guidance-that-comes-from-the-mind-we-should/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [I think in the Western world we have gotten overly identified with doing, and we've kind of forgotten about the art of being. And…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/i-think-in-the-western-world-we-have-gotten-overly-identified-with/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Imagining what you want as if it already exists opens the door to letting it happen.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/imagining-what-you-want-as-if-it-already-exists-opens-the-door-to/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Most of us are in touch with our intuition whether we know it or not, but we're usually in the habit of doubting or…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/most-of-us-are-in-touch-with-our-intuition-whether-we-know-it-or-not/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/every-time-you-don-t-follow-your-inner-guidance-you-feel-a-loss-of/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [As we begin to love and appreciate ourselves as we are, our channels open and we access the infinite vitality of life force.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/as-we-begin-to-love-and-appreciate-ourselves-as-we-are-our-channels/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) > [My willingness to be intimate with my own deep feelings creates the space for intimacy with another.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/my-willingness-to-be-intimate-with-my-own-deep-feelings-creates-the/) [Shakti Gawain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) [Explore all 166 Shakti Gawain quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/) ## More Assertiveness quotes > [“Be calm; yet assertive. Be meek; yet courageous. Be gentle; yet bold. Be kind; yet strong.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-f-glassman-2/be-calm-yet-assertive-be-meek-yet-courageous-be-gentle-yet-bold-be/) [Charles F Glassman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-f-glassman-2/) > [Being assertive in the home does not produce any smiling faces, but it does bring out a few tongues.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wes-fesler/being-assertive-in-the-home-does-not-produce-any-smiling-faces-but-it/) [Wes Fesler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wes-fesler/) > [I think naturally, if you're an actor, there's a high level of assertiveness that you need to have to survive this business. There's boldness…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bryan-cranston/i-think-naturally-if-you-re-an-actor-there-s-a-high-level-of/) [Bryan Cranston](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bryan-cranston/) > [“It’s a fact that you’re going to have a different opinion or view on certain topics or issues. You need stand your ground by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-barbarulo-author-god-s-healing-hands-allow-god-to-reshape-your-soul/it-s-a-fact-that-you-re-going-to-have-a-different-opinion-or-view-on/) [Michael Barbarulo: Author God's Healing Hands: Allow God To Reshape Your Soul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-barbarulo-author-god-s-healing-hands-allow-god-to-reshape-your-soul/) > [I had received my first establishment grants in response to applications filed the year before. To the pages of baffling forms I had simply…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/twyla-tharp/i-had-received-my-first-establishment-grants-in-response-to/) [Twyla Tharp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/twyla-tharp/) > [“Every great achiever is inspired by a great mentor.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/every-great-achiever-is-inspired-by-a-great-mentor/) [Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/) > [ \[After her 18-day disappearance in 1974:\] I love my husband very, very much, but he didn't ask me when he ran for mayor and… ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/angela-alioto/after-her-18-day-disappearance-in-1974-i-love-my-husband-very-very/) [Angela Alioto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/angela-alioto/) > [If you are going to have to play defense all the time, you cannot have the kind of ingenuity, assertiveness, independence, and intelligence which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arlen-specter/if-you-are-going-to-have-to-play-defense-all-the-time-you-cannot-have/) [Arlen Specter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arlen-specter/) > [“Some people’s self-esteem was secretly improved when they discovered that their then-lovers had killed themselves over them.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mokokoma-mokhonoana/some-people-s-self-esteem-was-secretly-improved-when-they-discovered/) [Mokokoma Mokhonoana](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mokokoma-mokhonoana/) > [Once you have a major success with assertiveness, you learn that it's a much healthier path than being a doormat to the insensitive folks.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/doreen-virtue/once-you-have-a-major-success-with-assertiveness-you-learn-that-it-s/) [Doreen Virtue](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/doreen-virtue/) > [The duty we owe ourselves is greater than that we owe others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louisa-may-alcott/the-duty-we-owe-ourselves-is-greater-than-that-we-owe-others/) [Louisa May Alcott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louisa-may-alcott/) > [“I have what it takes to get the work done.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lailah-gifty-akita/i-have-what-it-takes-to-get-the-work-done/) [Lailah Gifty Akita](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lailah-gifty-akita/) > [If you overcome your fear to ask someone for a date, a raise, or help with a project, that is an act of self-assertiveness.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nathaniel-branden/if-you-overcome-your-fear-to-ask-someone-for-a-date-a-raise-or-help/) [Nathaniel Branden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nathaniel-branden/) > [“Whoa, hello, assertiveness! How lovely to make your acquaintance.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-leveen/whoa-hello-assertiveness-how-lovely-to-make-your-acquaintance/) [Tom Leveen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-leveen/) > [I think the opposite version of me is the one we don't see, which is there are tens of thousands of outrageously successful businesses…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-vaynerchuk/i-think-the-opposite-version-of-me-is-the-one-we-don-t-see-which-is/) [Gary Vaynerchuk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-vaynerchuk/) [Browse all 85 Assertiveness quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/assertiveness/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Shakti Gawain" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-who-you-are/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Assertiveness" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-who-you-are/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/23a/shakti-gawain-2428_assertiveness_assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-wh_1416.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Assertiveness is not what you do, it's who you are!” — Shakti Gawain", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Shakti Gawain", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shakti-gawain/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Assertiveness is not what you do,...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-who-you-are/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shakti-gawain/assertiveness-is-not-what-you-do-it-s-who-you-are/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```