--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Happiness is not a choice, or we’d all be…" description: "\"“Happiness is not a choice, or we’d all be happy. Let’s stop putting unnecessary pressure on ourselves to be happy all the time, and to pretend we can ..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/286/scott-stabile-1367_belief_happiness-is-not-a-choice-or-we-d-all-be_3144198.jpg" --- # Happiness is not a choice, or we’d all be happy. Let’s… ![“Happiness is not a choice, or we’d all be happy. Let’s stop putting unnecessary pressure on ourselves to be happy all the time, and to pretend we can choose to be happy whenever we want. That’s not how life works. Sure, we can make choices that reflect a commitment to our well-being, and the more…” quote by Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/286/scott-stabile-1367_belief_happiness-is-not-a-choice-or-we-d-all-be_3144198.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/286/scott-stabile-1367_belief_happiness-is-not-a-choice-or-we-d-all-be_3144198.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/286/scott-stabile-1367_belief_happiness-is-not-a-choice-or-we-d-all-be_3144198.jpg) > ““Happiness is not a choice, or we’d all be happy. Let’s stop putting unnecessary pressure on ourselves to be happy all the time, and to pretend we can choose to be happy whenever we want. That’s not how life works. Sure, we can make choices that reflect a commitment to our well-being, and the more of these choices we make, the more likely we are to find ourselves feeling good more often. Healthy choices are within our power, and are important. But we can’t choose happiness, and we just set ourselves up for failure by believing we can. Life is more than happiness, anyway. It’s okay to feel all the things we feel. It’s human. There’s no shame in wanting to be happy, of course. We all want to be happy. But rather than try to choose happiness, maybe we can choose to being kinder and more loving. That we can do. We can work hard to take better care of ourselves, and better care of each other. If we do these things, and we remember that we are all connected, all brothers and sisters, all worthy of love, maybe then happiness will choose us a little more often.”” [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Happiness cannot be forced; instead, focus on kindness, self‑care, and connection, which naturally foster well‑being. **In simple terms:** We can’t choose happiness, but we can choose caring actions. Key Takeaway Cultivate kindness and self‑care rather than chasing happiness. Themes kindness self‑care connection well‑being realism Mood reflective empathetic grounded Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - daily routines - relationships - community service - mental health practices Key Concepts psychology behavioral science philosophy Questions to Reflect On - What small acts of kindness can you practice today? - How does connection improve your mood? A Different Perspective Expecting constant happiness can cause disappointment and self‑criticism. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Belief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/belief/) [Brothers and sisters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/brothers-and-sisters/) [Choice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choice/) [Choice Happy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choice-happy-2257801/) [Choose Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choose-happiness/) [Choose Happy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choose-happy/) [Choose to be happy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/choose-to-be-happy/) [Failure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/failure/) [Family](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/family/) [Feeling good](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feeling-good/) [Friends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/friends/) [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) [Happiness Choice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness-choice/) [Happiness Choose](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness-choose-893480/) [Happy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happy/) [Health](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/health/) [Healthy choices](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/healthy-choices/) [Human](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/human/) [Inspirational quotes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/inspirational-quotes/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Life work](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life-work/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/) [Loving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/loving/) [Power](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/power/) [Shame](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/shame/) [Truth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/truth/) [Well being](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/well-being/) [Work hard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/work-hard/) [Worthy of love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/worthy-of-love/) ## Related quotes > [People have to work to maintain happiness. It's easy to be miserable. It's easy to stay miserable. It's easy to live in a place…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tituss-burgess/people-have-to-work-to-maintain-happiness-it-s-easy-to-be-miserable/) [Tituss Burgess](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tituss-burgess/) > [At any given moment the choice to be happy is present we just have to choose to be happy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-maraboli/at-any-given-moment-the-choice-to-be-happy-is-present-we-just-have-to/) [Steve Maraboli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-maraboli/) > [In every single moment, we have the choice to be happy or not. No matter what is going on, we can choose to focus…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-j-ryan/in-every-single-moment-we-have-the-choice-to-be-happy-or-not-no/) [M. J. Ryan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-j-ryan/) > [“If you believe in God, then you’re a child of God. As such, you’re as worthy of love as anyone who has ever lived.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/if-you-believe-in-god-then-you-re-a-child-of-god-as-such-you-re-as/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“I know it’s hard sometimes to recognize how truly beautiful you are, and how truly worthy of love you have always been and will…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/i-know-it-s-hard-sometimes-to-recognize-how-truly-beautiful-you-are/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“at last he understood that he has always been forgiven and worthy of love, and that no one could take that from him, that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/at-last-he-understood-that-he-has-always-been-forgiven-and-worthy-of/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Love doesn't pity, nor does it resent. Love understands that, no matter our circumstances, we are all equal. We are all the same. We…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/love-doesn-t-pity-nor-does-it-resent-love-understands-that-no-matter/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Happiness is what you choose, what you follow, not what follows you. These are the things I have seen, these are the things I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allison-winn-scotch/happiness-is-what-you-choose-what-you-follow-not-what-follows-you/) [Allison Winn Scotch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allison-winn-scotch/) > [“Do not live in the shadows of others. Do not let anyone determine your happiness either. It's either you choose your own destiny and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marcia-m-edwards/do-not-live-in-the-shadows-of-others-do-not-let-anyone-determine-your/) [Marcia M Edwards](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marcia-m-edwards/) > [What if happiness were found in the serenity of simple pleasures. 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You can't choose both.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sonya-parker/you-can-be-bitter-the-rest-of-your-life-or-you-can-move-on-and-find/) [Sonya Parker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sonya-parker/) > [I think the difference between finding happiness, or moments of happiness, is how you choose to interpret things. That's a rather shocking responsibility. That…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/natascha-mcelhone/i-think-the-difference-between-finding-happiness-or-moments-of/) [Natascha McElhone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/natascha-mcelhone/) > [“A person who has many kinds of happiness to choose from usually ends up being miserable”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/angelos-michalopoulos/a-person-who-has-many-kinds-of-happiness-to-choose-from-usually-ends/) [Angelos Michalopoulos](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/angelos-michalopoulos/) ## More by Scott Stabile > [“She felt wild and unruly, determined and free.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/she-felt-wild-and-unruly-determined-and-free/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“What is true for you? What makes your heart smile? When do you feel most yourself? What do you love to do? 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Make noise…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/shout-out-to-the-noisemakers-our-world-needs-your-voices-make-noise/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“If only I could spend all my days surrounded by people brave enough to open their hearts for real.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/if-only-i-could-spend-all-my-days-surrounded-by-people-brave-enough/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Love is not blind. Love sees everything and says yes to it all.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/love-is-not-blind-love-sees-everything-and-says-yes-to-it-all/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Your past and your pain will certainly impact you, but they don’t have to define you. You get to write your own definition.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/your-past-and-your-pain-will-certainly-impact-you-but-they-don-t-have/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“A little creativity can make something ordinary, extraordinary, and something extraordinary that much more so.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/a-little-creativity-can-make-something-ordinary-extraordinary-and/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“You don’t have to do the same things you’ve always done, if it no longer feels good to do them. Give yourself permission to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/you-don-t-have-to-do-the-same-things-you-ve-always-done-if-it-no/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“I've wasted a lot of time in my life waiting for good things to happen, rather than acting to make them happen. What I've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/i-ve-wasted-a-lot-of-time-in-my-life-waiting-for-good-things-to/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Friends...we can paralyze ourselves with the need to have all the details in order, with the desire to know all of the hows, with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/friends-we-can-paralyze-ourselves-with-the-need-to-have-all-the/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“Let's never stop holding each other's hands. We all need to have our hand held sometimes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/let-s-never-stop-holding-each-other-s-hands-we-all-need-to-have-our/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“I don't know about you, but sometimes I need to remind myself to breathe. I have to close my eyes and concentrate, even force…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/i-don-t-know-about-you-but-sometimes-i-need-to-remind-myself-to/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“We're not on the same page right now, but that's okay. Were still in the same story, and there's still so much more to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/we-re-not-on-the-same-page-right-now-but-that-s-okay-were-still-in/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) > [“She wished she liked him more. She wished she loved him less.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/scott-stabile/she-wished-she-liked-him-more-she-wished-she-loved-him-less/) [Scott Stabile](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) [Explore all 250 Scott Stabile quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/scott-stabile/) ## More Belief quotes > [“Cine a ucis stelele? Cine a surpat drumul spre viitor al celor din morminte?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ionel-teodoreanu/cine-a-ucis-stelele-cine-a-surpat-drumul-spre-viitor-al-celor-din/) [Ionel Teodoreanu](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ionel-teodoreanu/) > [“MIND & GRIND Self-belief and hard work can propel you past more talented peers”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kamil-ali/mind-grind-self-belief-and-hard-work-can-propel-you-past-more/) [Kamil Ali](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kamil-ali/) > [Philosopher is a dictator who modifies accepted standards with his thoughts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ilkin-santak/philosopher-is-a-dictator-who-modifies-accepted-standards-with-his/) [Ilkin Santak](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ilkin-santak/) > [There is something about the South that accepts the supernatural. If you don't accept it and you're having a conversation with someone who does,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-englert/there-is-something-about-the-south-that-accepts-the-supernatural-if/) [Alice Englert](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-englert/) > [It took me 20 years of hard training to get the physique I have today. what you need is what i had - BELIEF…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/branch-warren/it-took-me-20-years-of-hard-training-to-get-the-physique-i-have-today/) [Branch Warren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/branch-warren/) > [“Here is a fundamental difference between the man of faith and the man of unbelief. The unbeliever is 'of the world', judges everything by…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arthur-w-pink/here-is-a-fundamental-difference-between-the-man-of-faith-and-the-man/) [Arthur W. Pink](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arthur-w-pink/) > [“She herself vacillated when it came to belief. She did not particularly believe in God. Or, rather, she didn't believe in a particular God.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/allegra-goodman/she-herself-vacillated-when-it-came-to-belief-she-did-not/) [Allegra Goodman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/allegra-goodman/) > [Let us remember that every worldview-not just Christianity's-must give an explanation or an answer for evil and suffering...this is not just a problem distinctive…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ravi-zacharias/let-us-remember-that-every-worldview-not-just-christianity-s-must/) [Ravi Zacharias](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ravi-zacharias/) > [“Rigid traditions capture souls prisons of spiritual thought man’s religion has captured a god grown too small and very weak.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/david-w-earle/rigid-traditions-capture-souls-prisons-of-spiritual-thought-man-s/) [David W Earle](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/david-w-earle/) > [We can find common qualities and common values that have made Britain the country it is. 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Sure, we can make choices that reflect a commitment to our well-being, and the more of these choices we make, the more likely we are to find ourselves feeling good more often. Healthy choices are within our power, and are important. But we can’t choose happiness, and we just set ourselves up for failure by believing we can. Life is more than happiness, anyway. It’s okay to feel all the things we feel. It’s human. There’s no shame in wanting to be happy, of course. We all want to be happy. But rather than try to choose happiness, maybe we can choose to being kinder and more loving. That we can do. We can work hard to take better care of ourselves, and better care of each other. 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