--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: I had only silence in my head. Only…" description: "\"“I had only silence in my head. Only silence, as I began screaming. Screaming and screaming and screaming. The emptiness in my chest, my soul at the la..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/397/sarah-j-maas-58_a-court-of-wings-and_i-had-only-silence-in-my-head-only-silen_1921461.png" --- # I had only silence in my head. Only silence, as I began… ![“I had only silence in my head. Only silence, as I began screaming. Screaming and screaming and screaming. The emptiness in my chest, my soul at the lack of that bond, that life- I was shaking him, screaming his name and shaking him, and my body stopped being my body and just became this thing that…” quote by Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/397/sarah-j-maas-58_a-court-of-wings-and_i-had-only-silence-in-my-head-only-silen_1921461.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/397/sarah-j-maas-58_a-court-of-wings-and_i-had-only-silence-in-my-head-only-silen_1921461.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/397/sarah-j-maas-58_a-court-of-wings-and_i-had-only-silence-in-my-head-only-silen_1921461.png) > ““I had only silence in my head. Only silence, as I began screaming. Screaming and screaming and screaming. The emptiness in my chest, my soul at the lack of that bond, that life- I was shaking him, screaming his name and shaking him, and my body stopped being my body and just became this thing that held me and this lack of him, and I could not stop screaming and screaming-”” [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. The narrator experiences overwhelming grief and loss, feeling a void that turns into relentless, uncontrollable anguish. **In simple terms:** Intense grief turns into endless screaming. Key Takeaway Acknowledge pain before it consumes you. Themes grief loss despair Mood despair intense raw Type literary emotional When to use this quote - personal loss - mental health crisis - creative expression - support groups - therapy sessions Key Concepts psychology trauma emotional overflow Questions to Reflect On - How does silence amplify grief? - What can break the cycle of endless screaming? A Different Perspective The quote may dramatize pain, but real coping often requires calm reflection and external help. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [A-court-of-wings-and-ruin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/a-court-of-wings-and-ruin/) [Began Screaming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/began-screaming-2953412/) [Dead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dead/) [Feyre](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feyre/) [Feyre-archeron](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/feyre-archeron/) [Grief](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grief/) [Heartbreaking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/heartbreaking/) [Rhys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rhys/) [Rhysand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/rhysand/) [Sarah-j-maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sarah-j-maas/) [Screaming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/screaming/) [Screaming Emptiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/screaming-emptiness-400838/) [Screaming Shaking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/screaming-shaking-2953413/) [Shaking Screaming](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/shaking-screaming-2953411/) [Silence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/silence/) ## Related quotes > [“What does he look like? The question was soft- tentative. I knew who he meant. I interlaced my fingers through Rhysand's and squeezed tightly.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/what-does-he-look-like-the-question-was-soft-tentative-i-knew-who-he/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I stepped forward, and didn't give Lucien time to step back as I hugged him tightly. 'Thank you,' I said, trying not to think…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-stepped-forward-and-didn-t-give-lucien-time-to-step-back-as-i/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“The flame in her eyes was not of your usual sort, I take it.' Lucien shook his head. 'No. It spoke to nothing in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/the-flame-in-her-eyes-was-not-of-your-usual-sort-i-take-it-lucien/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Twenty gold marks says there's a fight in the first hour,' Cassian said, still not really looking at Nesta. 'Thirty, and I say within…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/twenty-gold-marks-says-there-s-a-fight-in-the-first-hour-cassian-said/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Night Triumphant- and the Stars Eternal. If he was the sweet, terrifying darkness, I was the glittering light that only his shadows could make…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/night-triumphant-and-the-stars-eternal-if-he-was-the-sweet-terrifying/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Lucien claimed you would come,' Tamlin said by way of greeting, voice as flat and lifeless as his eyes, a hand still braced on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/lucien-claimed-you-would-come-tamlin-said-by-way-of-greeting-voice-as/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Rhys stepped up to my side. 'As High Lady, Feyre is no longer my emissary to the human world.' He gave Nesta a tentative…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/rhys-stepped-up-to-my-side-as-high-lady-feyre-is-no-longer-my/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“The chamber was a cool, chill black- as if we'd stepped inside the mind of some sleeping beast. And within its round space gleamed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/the-chamber-was-a-cool-chill-black-as-if-we-d-stepped-inside-the-mind/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“What do you want?' I hissed. 'An apology? For me to crawl back into your bed and play nice, little wife?' 'Why should I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/what-do-you-want-i-hissed-an-apology-for-me-to-crawl-back-into-your/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“No going back now,' Cassian said to Rhys, gesturing to his wings. Rhys slid his hands into his pockets. 'I figure it's time for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/no-going-back-now-cassian-said-to-rhys-gesturing-to-his-wings-rhys/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I'm not in the business of discussing our plans with enemies.' Helion, across the reflection pool, grinned like a lion. 'No,' Tamlin said with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-m-not-in-the-business-of-discussing-our-plans-with-enemies-helion/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“If you hadn't stolen my bride away in the night, Rhysand, I would not have been forced to take such drastic measures to get…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/if-you-hadn-t-stolen-my-bride-away-in-the-night-rhysand-i-would-not/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“You and pretty Tarquin had a moment today. Do you truly think he'll join us?' 'If you mean in bed, definitely not,' Rhys said…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/you-and-pretty-tarquin-had-a-moment-today-do-you-truly-think-he-ll/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I caught a bob of Rhys's throat as we cleared the final steps to the open doorway. ... And though his face was calm,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-caught-a-bob-of-rhys-s-throat-as-we-cleared-the-final-steps-to-the/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I told you that the moment we started letting females into our group, they'd be nothing but trouble.' 'As far as I can recall,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-told-you-that-the-moment-we-started-letting-females-into-our-group/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) ## More by Sarah J. Maas > [“Light it up, bitch.' 'Light it up, asshole,' ...”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/light-it-up-bitch-light-it-up-asshole/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“What does he look like? The question was soft- tentative. I knew who he meant. I interlaced my fingers through Rhysand's and squeezed tightly.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/what-does-he-look-like-the-question-was-soft-tentative-i-knew-who-he/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Lysandra chuckled, a surprisingly deep, wicked sound—probably a laugh she never let Arobynn or her clients hear. “Some night soon, I’ll sneak back in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/lysandra-chuckled-a-surprisingly-deep-wicked-sound-probably-a-laugh/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I love you. I am in love with you, Rowan. I have been for a while. And I know there are limits to what…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-love-you-i-am-in-love-with-you-rowan-i-have-been-for-a-while-and-i/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Perhaps Nesta will take up the blood-drinking habit, too. I certainly believe her threat to rip out my throat. Maybe she'll enjoy the taste.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/perhaps-nesta-will-take-up-the-blood-drinking-habit-too-i-certainly/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“To being the most fearsome and imposing girls the world has ever seen.” Celaena raised her goblet high before she drank. As she swallowed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/to-being-the-most-fearsome-and-imposing-girls-the-world-has-ever-seen/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“have no interest in prisoners or battling today,” Manon said. The Queen of Terrasen gave her a grin. “Good.” Manon turned away, barking at…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/have-no-interest-in-prisoners-or-battling-today-manon-said-the-queen/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Well, I'm late for something incredibly important," Lucien said, and before I could call him on his outright lie or beg him to stay,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/well-i-m-late-for-something-incredibly-important-lucien-said-and/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Holy gods. He'd frozen the whole damn lake. He was THAT powerful?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/holy-gods-he-d-frozen-the-whole-damn-lake-he-was-that-powerful/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“She bellowed the last word with such soul-deep hatred that he felt it like a punch to the gut.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/she-bellowed-the-last-word-with-such-soul-deep-hatred-that-he-felt-it/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Afraid she and I had a summer romance?" That insufferable grin was still there. "I hope you did. I certainly enjoyed myself this summer."…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/afraid-she-and-i-had-a-summer-romance-that-insufferable-grin-was/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“There are different kinds of darkness,” Rhys said. I kept my eyes shut. “There is the darkness that frightens, the darkness that soothes, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/there-are-different-kinds-of-darkness-rhys-said-i-kept-my-eyes-shut/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“So you’re going to ask Ress and Brullo to just leave a back door open so you can sneak in?” “Don’t be so simpleminded.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/so-you-re-going-to-ask-ress-and-brullo-to-just-leave-a-back-door-open/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Gently, he pulled my hands away from my face. Gently, he took my cheeks in his hands and brushed away my tears. I didn’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/gently-he-pulled-my-hands-away-from-my-face-gently-he-took-my-cheeks/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I barely saw my silk slipper as it flew through the air, fast as a shooting star, so fast that even a High Lord…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-barely-saw-my-silk-slipper-as-it-flew-through-the-air-fast-as-a/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) [Explore all 1,807 Sarah J. Maas quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) ## More A-court-of-wings-and-ruin quotes > [“What does he look like? The question was soft- tentative. I knew who he meant. I interlaced my fingers through Rhysand's and squeezed tightly.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/what-does-he-look-like-the-question-was-soft-tentative-i-knew-who-he/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I see all of you, Rhys. And there is not one part that I do not love with everything I am.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-see-all-of-you-rhys-and-there-is-not-one-part-that-i-do-not-love/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I caught a bob of Rhys's throat as we cleared the final steps to the open doorway. ... And though his face was calm,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-caught-a-bob-of-rhys-s-throat-as-we-cleared-the-final-steps-to-the/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Amren,' Varian said, and sank onto his knees. 'I am begging you-' ... She looked to Varian, a wry smile on her red mouth.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/amren-varian-said-and-sank-onto-his-knees-i-am-begging-you-she-looked/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Helion threw himself onto the couch across from Cassian and Mor. He'd ditched that radiant crown somewhere, but kept that gold armband of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/helion-threw-himself-onto-the-couch-across-from-cassian-and-mor-he-d/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“You and pretty Tarquin had a moment today. Do you truly think he'll join us?' 'If you mean in bed, definitely not,' Rhys said…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/you-and-pretty-tarquin-had-a-moment-today-do-you-truly-think-he-ll/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Rhys turned his head, looking me over from head to toe. Then back to Tamlin. A storm about to be unleashed. But it was…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas-2/rhys-turned-his-head-looking-me-over-from-head-to-toe-then-back-to/) [Sarah J Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas-2/) > [“It will be- very dangerous.' A half smile curved Lucien's mouth. 'Good. It'd be boring otherwise.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/it-will-be-very-dangerous-a-half-smile-curved-lucien-s-mouth-good-it/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“If you hadn't stolen my bride away in the night, Rhysand, I would not have been forced to take such drastic measures to get…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/if-you-hadn-t-stolen-my-bride-away-in-the-night-rhysand-i-would-not/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“I'm not in the business of discussing our plans with enemies.' Helion, across the reflection pool, grinned like a lion. 'No,' Tamlin said with…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/i-m-not-in-the-business-of-discussing-our-plans-with-enemies-helion/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“You're still lovely," Mor said a bit gently. Elain offered a half smile. "I suppose that war makes wanting things like that unimportant." Mor…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/you-re-still-lovely-mor-said-a-bit-gently-elain-offered-a-half-smile/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“No going back now,' Cassian said to Rhys, gesturing to his wings. Rhys slid his hands into his pockets. 'I figure it's time for…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/no-going-back-now-cassian-said-to-rhys-gesturing-to-his-wings-rhys/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“What do you want?' I hissed. 'An apology? For me to crawl back into your bed and play nice, little wife?' 'Why should I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/what-do-you-want-i-hissed-an-apology-for-me-to-crawl-back-into-your/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“Lucien. It was Lucien. Lucien, haggard and bloody, panting for breath. As if he'd run from the shore. His gaze settled on Elain, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/lucien-it-was-lucien-lucien-haggard-and-bloody-panting-for-breath-as/) [Sarah J. Maas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-j-maas/) > [“The chamber was a cool, chill black- as if we'd stepped inside the mind of some sleeping beast. And within its round space gleamed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-j-maas/the-chamber-was-a-cool-chill-black-as-if-we-d-stepped-inside-the-mind/) [Sarah J. 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