--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Why are you being so nice to me?' I asked…" description: "\"“Why are you being so nice to me?' I asked her. 'You know,' she said, 'when you say stuff like that I just want to slap you.' 'What?' 'You heard me.' S..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5d8/sarah-dessen-110_respect_why-are-you-being-so-nice-to-me-i-asked_1950666.png" --- # Why are you being so nice to me?' I asked her. 'You know,'… ![“Why are you being so nice to me?' I asked her. 'You know,' she said, 'when you say stuff like that I just want to slap you.' 'What?' 'You heard me.' She picked up her beer and took a swallow, still watching me. Then she said, 'Colie, you should never be surprised when people treat you with…” quote by Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5d8/sarah-dessen-110_respect_why-are-you-being-so-nice-to-me-i-asked_1950666.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5d8/sarah-dessen-110_respect_why-are-you-being-so-nice-to-me-i-asked_1950666.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5d8/sarah-dessen-110_respect_why-are-you-being-so-nice-to-me-i-asked_1950666.png) > ““Why are you being so nice to me?' I asked her. 'You know,' she said, 'when you say stuff like that I just want to slap you.' 'What?' 'You heard me.' She picked up her beer and took a swallow, still watching me. Then she said, 'Colie, you should never be surprised when people treat you with respect. You should expect it.' I shook my head. 'You don’t know-' I began. But, as usual, she didn’t let me finish. 'Yes,' she said simply. 'I do know. I’ve watched you, Colie. You walk around like a dog waiting to be kicked, and when someone does, you pout and cry like you didn’t deserve it.' 'No one deserves to be kicked,' I said. 'I disagree,' she said flatly. 'You do if you don’t think you’re worth any better.”” [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Self‑worth is shaped by how we accept respect and reject self‑defeating expectations. **In simple terms:** Self‑worth depends on accepting respect and rejecting low expectations. Key Takeaway Demand respect and recognize your value. Themes self‑esteem boundaries assertiveness Mood empowering introspective Type motivational philosophical When to use this quote - dating - workplace - friendships - family gatherings Key Concepts personal value social dynamics psychology Questions to Reflect On - What expectations do you hold about how you should be treated? - How can you assert your worth without feeling guilty? A Different Perspective Respect can be misinterpreted or withheld by others. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Colie Surprised](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/colie-surprised-3163966/) [Kicked Said](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/kicked-said-2901799/) [Respect](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/respect/) [Slap Heard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/slap-heard-1670469/) [Want Slap](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/want-slap-376141/) [Watched Colie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/watched-colie-3163965/) ## Related quotes > [“The slap heard around the world.” ~~ John from Just...Breathe”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/angela-fattig/the-slap-heard-around-the-world-john-from-just-breathe/) [Angela Fattig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/angela-fattig/) > [I fell into a deep sleep tucked in that little cocoon, a deeper sleep than I might of had in years. Right up until…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-patterson/i-fell-into-a-deep-sleep-tucked-in-that-little-cocoon-a-deeper-sleep/) [James Patterson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-patterson/) > [“Rook Thomas, you look different somehow." "Well, I recently got the shit kicked out of me," she said. "Ah, that would be it then.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-o-malley/rook-thomas-you-look-different-somehow-well-i-recently-got-the-shit/) [Daniel O'Malley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-o-malley/) > [“He probably likes you. That's no reason to put ink all--" "I don't want him to like me," she said. Then she started looking…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-d-salinger/he-probably-likes-you-that-s-no-reason-to-put-ink-all-i-don-t-want/) [J.D. Salinger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-d-salinger/) > [I want to slap you, with a brick. HARD!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-want-to-slap-you-with-a-brick-hard/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [That annoying moment when someone asks you what's wrong and they're the problem so you just want to slap them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sharon/that-annoying-moment-when-someone-asks-you-what-s-wrong-and-they-re/) [Sharon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sharon/) > [“I wonder why I still want to slap her. I must be a very mean and unforgiving person.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cathy-cassidy/i-wonder-why-i-still-want-to-slap-her-i-must-be-a-very-mean-and/) [Cathy Cassidy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cathy-cassidy/) > [I've got such a disgusting, wide, smug grin on my face all the time that my friends just want to slap me. I've never…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-valance/i-ve-got-such-a-disgusting-wide-smug-grin-on-my-face-all-the-time/) [Holly Valance](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-valance/) > [“Tears spill down her cheeks. “I’m so pissed off at you right now that I can’t see straight. I simultaneously love the fuck out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/georgia-cates/tears-spill-down-her-cheeks-i-m-so-pissed-off-at-you-right-now-that-i/) [Georgia Cates](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/georgia-cates/) > [“Will you--tell me--about the diamond mines?” “The diamond mines?” broke out Lavinia. “Nasty, little spoiled thing, I should like to slap her!” Sara got…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frances-hodgson-burnett/will-you-tell-me-about-the-diamond-mines-the-diamond-mines-broke-out/) [Frances Hodgson Burnett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frances-hodgson-burnett/) > [Sometimes I just want to slap some sense into people!!! -\_-](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel/sometimes-i-just-want-to-slap-some-sense-into-people/) [Rachel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel/) > [There's nothing wrong with being two-faced. Just let me know which one you want me to slap first.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/there-s-nothing-wrong-with-being-two-faced-just-let-me-know-which-one/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [When you really want to SLAP SOMEONE DO IT…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hottiedevil/when-you-really-want-to-slap-someone-do-it/) [HOttieDeviL](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hottiedevil/) > [“When he sees me, he stops. His eyes widen, his face pales. And then before i can say anything, he's holding me. And the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/courtney-summers/when-he-sees-me-he-stops-his-eyes-widen-his-face-pales-and-then/) [Courtney Summers](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/courtney-summers/) > [I want to slap on you, but I don't want a slut on my hand!!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-want-to-slap-on-you-but-i-don-t-want-a-slut-on-my-hand/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Sarah Dessen > [Sometimes a question can hurt more than an answer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/sometimes-a-question-can-hurt-more-than-an-answer/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [“if i were a book i would be so open”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/if-i-were-a-book-i-would-be-so-open/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [Harder to get in than out, like so little else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/harder-to-get-in-than-out-like-so-little-else/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [“At times, I found myself questioning his very existence, even though I knew I had, in fact, spotted him, with my own eyes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/at-times-i-found-myself-questioning-his-very-existence-even-though-i/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [You don't have to say it out loud. 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And eventually, if you were lucky, you did it well.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/when-you-had-to-do-something-you-had-to-do-it-and-eventually-if-you/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [the truth about forever is that it is happening right now](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/the-truth-about-forever-is-that-it-is-happening-right-now/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [I jammed my hand in my jacket pocket, bracing myself fo the next hit, and fel something. Something grainy and samll, sticking to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-jammed-my-hand-in-my-jacket-pocket-bracing-myself-fo-the-next-hit/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [I had no illusions about love anymore. It came, it went, it left casualties or it didn't. People weren't meant to be together forever,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-had-no-illusions-about-love-anymore-it-came-it-went-it-left/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [“But maybe that isn't so bad. You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-maybe-that-isn-t-so-bad-you-can-t-love-anyone-that-way-more-than/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [This was just one night, one chance to vary and see where it took me. The fireflies were probably already out: maybe it wasn’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/this-was-just-one-night-one-chance-to-vary-and-see-where-it-took-me/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [call it chicken salad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/call-it-chicken-salad/) [Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/) > [“For me, however, it was a mix of the two, this constant push and pull. I loved it here. 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I fought as hard as I could on the Remain side, but I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/damian-green/few-political-debates-have-been-as-divisive-as-the-european-one-i/) [Damian Green](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/damian-green/) > [Almost everywhere we find . . . the use of various coercive measures, to rid ourselves as quickly as possible of the child withinus--i.e.,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/alice-miller/almost-everywhere-we-find-the-use-of-various-coercive-measures-to-rid/) [Alice Miller](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/alice-miller/) > [How could you feel worthless when God has honoured you by creating you and choosing you to be with Him, in this life and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yasmin-mogahed/how-could-you-feel-worthless-when-god-has-honoured-you-by-creating/) [Yasmin Mogahed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yasmin-mogahed/) > [The older you've gotten, the more respect and admiration you've received.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jupp-heynckes/the-older-you-ve-gotten-the-more-respect-and-admiration-you-ve/) [Jupp Heynckes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jupp-heynckes/) > [I don't believe in an afterlife. 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I asked her. 'You know,' she said, 'when you say stuff like that I just want to slap you.' 'What?' 'You heard me.' She picked up her beer and took a swallow, still watching me. Then she said, 'Colie, you should never be surprised when people treat you with respect. You should expect it.' I shook my head. 'You don’t know-' I began. But, as usual, she didn’t let me finish. 'Yes,' she said simply. 'I do know. I’ve watched you, Colie. You walk around like a dog waiting to be kicked, and when someone does, you pout and cry like you didn’t deserve it.' 'No one deserves to be kicked,' I said. 'I disagree,' she said flatly. 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