---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: But what he didn't understand was that…"
description: "\"But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life half-sleeping,everything at arm's length or farther away..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png"
---

#  But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was…

![“But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life half-sleeping,everything at arm's length or farther away. I understood those mermaids.I didn't care if they sang to me.All I wanted was to block out all the human voices as they called me name again and…” quote by Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png)

> “But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life half-sleeping,everything at arm's length or farther away. I understood those mermaids.I didn't care if they sang to me.All I wanted was to block out all the human voices as they called me name again and again,pulling me upward into light,to drown.”

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

The narrator feels detached from reality, seeking escape from overwhelming expectations and voices that define her identity.

**In simple terms:** She wants to shut out others and stay in a dreamlike state.

Key Takeaway

Create boundaries to protect your mental space.

Themes

isachment escape identity overwhelm

Mood

melancholic reflective

Type

literary contemplative

When to use this quote

- college life
- family pressure
- mental health coping
- creative writing

Key Concepts

Existentialism self‑preservation dreamscape

Questions to Reflect On

- What voices are you trying to silence?
- How can you balance escape with connection?

A Different Perspective

The desire to block out voices may also isolate you from support.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Arms](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/arms/) [Block](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/block/) [Care](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/care/) [Didn Understand](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/didn-understand-263298/) [Dreamland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dreamland/) [Dreamland Preferable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/dreamland-preferable-3577562/) [Half](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/half/) [Humans](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/humans/) [Length](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/length/) [Life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/life/) [Light](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/light/) [Mermaid](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mermaid/) [Mermaids Didn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/mermaids-didn-3577560/) [Names](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/names/) [Sleep](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/sleep/) [This life](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/this-life/) [Understand Dreamland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understand-dreamland-3577561/) [Understood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understood/) [Understood Mermaids](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understood-mermaids-3577559/) [Voice](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/voice/) [Walking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/walking/) [Wanted](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/wanted/)

## Related quotes

> [Wake up, Caitlin, Mr. Lensing had said. But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable, walking through this life half-sleeping, everything…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/wake-up-caitlin-mr-lensing-had-said-but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [She was just a shell of her former self, functioning and talking but hardly alive.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/she-was-just-a-shell-of-her-former-self-functioning-and-talking-but/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [It's so easy to get caught up in what people expect of you. Sometimes, you can just lose yourself.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/it-s-so-easy-to-get-caught-up-in-what-people-expect-of-you-sometimes/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“It's not a switch you can just flip off", Dr. Marshall had told me once. "If you didn't love him, this never would have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/it-s-not-a-switch-you-can-just-flip-off-dr-marshall-had-told-me-once/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“We had just heard that story recounted so many times over the years that it was easy to take the details and fold them…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/we-had-just-heard-that-story-recounted-so-many-times-over-the-years/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [Now I felt like I was drifting, sucked down by an undertow, and too far out to swim back to the shore.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/now-i-felt-like-i-was-drifting-sucked-down-by-an-undertow-and-too-far/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [If you didn't love him, this never would have happened. But you did. And accepting that love and everything that followed it is part…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/if-you-didn-t-love-him-this-never-would-have-happened-but-you-did-and/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“I'll see you in Dreamland.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-ll-see-you-in-dreamland/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“See you in dreamland”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/see-you-in-dreamland/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [The young student sits with his head bent over his books, and his mind straying in youth's dreamland; where prose is prowling on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rabindranath-tagore/the-young-student-sits-with-his-head-bent-over-his-books-and-his-mind/)

[Rabindranath Tagore](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rabindranath-tagore/)

> [“And so the game went on in this manner, a throng of children playing keep-away from a bowling ball tossed back and forth between…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richelle-e-goodrich/and-so-the-game-went-on-in-this-manner-a-throng-of-children-playing/)

[Richelle E. Goodrich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richelle-e-goodrich/)

> [“Lost things never like to be found until they've been forgotten.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/e-j-mellow/lost-things-never-like-to-be-found-until-they-ve-been-forgotten/)

[E.J. Mellow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/e-j-mellow/)

> [“ It is a key keeper’s right to bestow a copy of his key on anyone he wishes. But this practice―a phenomenal rite―is hardly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richelle-e-goodrich/it-is-a-key-keeper-s-right-to-bestow-a-copy-of-his-key-on-anyone-he/)

[Richelle E. Goodrich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richelle-e-goodrich/)

> [“When your kid’s dying from a brain tumor or leukemia, the whole community shows up. They bring casseroles. They pray for you. They send…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sam-quinones/when-your-kid-s-dying-from-a-brain-tumor-or-leukemia-the-whole/)

[Sam Quinones](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sam-quinones/)

> [Up anchor! Up anchor! Set sail and away! The ventures of dreamland Are thine for a day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/silas-weir-mitchell/up-anchor-up-anchor-set-sail-and-away-the-ventures-of-dreamland-are/)

[Silas Weir Mitchell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/silas-weir-mitchell/)

## More by Sarah Dessen

> [Sometimes a question can hurt more than an answer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/sometimes-a-question-can-hurt-more-than-an-answer/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“if i were a book i would be so open”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/if-i-were-a-book-i-would-be-so-open/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [Harder to get in than out, like so little else.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/harder-to-get-in-than-out-like-so-little-else/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“At times, I found myself questioning his very existence, even though I knew I had, in fact, spotted him, with my own eyes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/at-times-i-found-myself-questioning-his-very-existence-even-though-i/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [You don't have to say it out loud. I already know why you like me.' 'You do, huh?' 'Yep.' He wrapped his arms around…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/you-don-t-have-to-say-it-out-loud-i-already-know-why-you-like-me-you/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [No relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/no-relationship-is-perfect-ever-there-are-always-some-ways-you-have/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [When you had to do something, you had to do it. And eventually, if you were lucky, you did it well.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/when-you-had-to-do-something-you-had-to-do-it-and-eventually-if-you/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [the truth about forever is that it is happening right now](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/the-truth-about-forever-is-that-it-is-happening-right-now/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [I jammed my hand in my jacket pocket, bracing myself fo the next hit, and fel something. Something grainy and samll, sticking to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-jammed-my-hand-in-my-jacket-pocket-bracing-myself-fo-the-next-hit/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [I had no illusions about love anymore. It came, it went, it left casualties or it didn't. People weren't meant to be together forever,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-had-no-illusions-about-love-anymore-it-came-it-went-it-left/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“But maybe that isn't so bad. You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-maybe-that-isn-t-so-bad-you-can-t-love-anyone-that-way-more-than/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [This was just one night, one chance to vary and see where it took me. The fireflies were probably already out: maybe it wasn’t…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/this-was-just-one-night-one-chance-to-vary-and-see-where-it-took-me/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [call it chicken salad](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/call-it-chicken-salad/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [“For me, however, it was a mix of the two, this constant push and pull. I loved it here. But I'd been in that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/for-me-however-it-was-a-mix-of-the-two-this-constant-push-and-pull-i/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [I think whenever a writer is really enjoying themselves and liking what they are doing, that shows on the page.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/i-think-whenever-a-writer-is-really-enjoying-themselves-and-liking/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

[Explore all 1,251 Sarah Dessen quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

## More Arms quotes

> [I genuinely did not expect more than half our nation to choose to walk away from our long-term allies into the arms of our…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-reade/i-genuinely-did-not-expect-more-than-half-our-nation-to-choose-to/)

[Brian Reade](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-reade/)

> [I don't wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same. So if somebody asks me what time it is, I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mitch-hedberg/i-don-t-wear-a-watch-because-i-want-my-arms-to-weigh-the-same-so-if/)

[Mitch Hedberg](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mitch-hedberg/)

> [Preaching to the choir actually arms the choir with arguments and elevates the choir's discourse. There's a reason the right does it and does…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dan-savage/preaching-to-the-choir-actually-arms-the-choir-with-arguments-and/)

[Dan Savage](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dan-savage/)

> [He caught her, she fell, he caught her in his arms, he held her tightly unconscious of what he was doing. He held her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victor-hugo/he-caught-her-she-fell-he-caught-her-in-his-arms-he-held-her-tightly/)

[Victor Hugo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victor-hugo/)

> [Are we fighting?" I asked Morelli. "No. Were discussing." "Are you sure?" "Am I yelling?" Morelli asked. "Is my face purple? Are the cords…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/janet-evanovich/are-we-fighting-i-asked-morelli-no-were-discussing-are-you-sure-am-i/)

[Janet Evanovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/janet-evanovich/)

> [A home isn't just a roof over our heads. A home is a place where we feel loved and where we love others. It's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/hermann-hesse/a-home-isn-t-just-a-roof-over-our-heads-a-home-is-a-place-where-we/)

[Hermann Hesse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/hermann-hesse/)

> [Comerado, this is no book,Who touches this, touches a man,(Is it night? Are we here alone?)It is I you hold, and who holds you,I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/walt-whitman/comerado-this-is-no-book-who-touches-this-touches-a-man-is-it-night/)

[Walt Whitman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/walt-whitman/)

> [Even the stove and the refrigerator looked human, I mean good human - they seemed to have arms and voices and they said, hang…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/even-the-stove-and-the-refrigerator-looked-human-i-mean-good-human/)

[Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/)

> [I separated the joints, the arm joints, the leg joints, and had to do two boilings. I think I used four boxes of Soilex…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-dahmer/i-separated-the-joints-the-arm-joints-the-leg-joints-and-had-to-do/)

[Jeffrey Dahmer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-dahmer/)

> [More courage is required to forgive than is required to take up arms.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jose-ramos-horta/more-courage-is-required-to-forgive-than-is-required-to-take-up-arms/)

[Jose Ramos-Horta](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jose-ramos-horta/)

> [It's been a long time since I asked anything of heaven, and my arms still haven't come down.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/antonio-porchia/it-s-been-a-long-time-since-i-asked-anything-of-heaven-and-my-arms/)

[Antonio Porchia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/antonio-porchia/)

> [With those who are willing to join, let us cooperate to reduce the burden of arms, to strengthen the structure of peace, to lift…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-m-nixon/with-those-who-are-willing-to-join-let-us-cooperate-to-reduce-the/)

[Richard M. Nixon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-m-nixon/)

> [How shall freedom be defended? By arms when it is attacked by arms, by truth when it is attacked by lies, by faith when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/archibald-macleish/how-shall-freedom-be-defended-by-arms-when-it-is-attacked-by-arms-by/)

[Archibald MacLeish](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/archibald-macleish/)

> [You don't have to say it out loud. I already know why you like me.' 'You do, huh?' 'Yep.' He wrapped his arms around…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/you-don-t-have-to-say-it-out-loud-i-already-know-why-you-like-me-you/)

[Sarah Dessen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/)

> [Another step had her backed up against the wall, and he braced his arms on both sides of her. "I'm beginning to look forward…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johanna-lindsey/another-step-had-her-backed-up-against-the-wall-and-he-braced-his/)

[Johanna Lindsey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johanna-lindsey/)

[Browse all 4,470 Arms quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/arms/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life half-sleeping,everything at arm's length or farther away. I understood those mermaids.I didn't care if they sang to me.All I wanted was to block out all the human voices as they called me name again and again,pulling me upward into light,to drown.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Sarah Dessen"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-this-dreamland-was-preferable/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Arms"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-this-dreamland-was-preferable/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fb6/sarah-dessen-110_arms_but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-t_398386.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“But what he didn't understand was that this dreamland was preferable,walking through this life…” — Sarah Dessen",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Sarah Dessen",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-dessen/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "But what he didn't understand was...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-this-dreamland-was-preferable/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-dessen/but-what-he-didn-t-understand-was-that-this-dreamland-was-preferable/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
