--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels…" description: "\"“It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels when he or she communicates “I deserve.” Narcissistic entitlement has nothing to do with genuine self-esteem..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2bc/sandy-hotchkiss-51597_fantasy-world_it-is-not-worthiness-the-narcissist-feel_2000449.jpg" --- # It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels when he or she… ![“It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels when he or she communicates “I deserve.” Narcissistic entitlement has nothing to do with genuine self-esteem, which comes from real accomplishment and being true to one’s own ideals. Individuals who feel entitled to respect without giving it in return, or…” quote by Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2bc/sandy-hotchkiss-51597_fantasy-world_it-is-not-worthiness-the-narcissist-feel_2000449.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2bc/sandy-hotchkiss-51597_fantasy-world_it-is-not-worthiness-the-narcissist-feel_2000449.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2bc/sandy-hotchkiss-51597_fantasy-world_it-is-not-worthiness-the-narcissist-feel_2000449.jpg) > ““It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels when he or she communicates “I deserve.” Narcissistic entitlement has nothing to do with genuine self-esteem, which comes from real accomplishment and being true to one’s own ideals. Individuals who feel entitled to respect without giving it in return, or who expect rewards without effort, or a life free of discomfort, are forfeiting any power they might have to shape their own destiny. They assume an essentially passive role and count on outside forces to make them happy. When what they expect doesn’t happen, they feel impotent. By claiming entitlement, they demand to live in the fantasy world of the one-year-old child. No wonder they’re enraged. Entitlement and the rage that comes with it are tip-offs to the arrest in healthy development that is narcissism.”” [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Entitlement masquerades as self‑esteem but lacks real achievement, leading to passive expectations and frustration when reality doesn’t comply. **In simple terms:** Entitlement is fake self‑esteem that causes frustration. Key Takeaway Earn respect through genuine effort. Themes self‑esteem entitlement personal growth psychology responsibility Mood reflective critical insightful Type philosophical psychological motivational When to use this quote - workplace - relationships - personal development - parenting - team leadership Key Concepts narcissism self‑concept validation power dynamics Questions to Reflect On - How can you differentiate healthy confidence from entitlement? - What steps can you take to shift from passive expectation to active contribution? A Different Perspective Entitlement can sometimes be a defensive coping mechanism rather than pure narcissism. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Entitlement](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/entitlement/) [Fantasy world](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/fantasy-world/) [Narcissist](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/narcissist/) [Narcissistic-abuse](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/narcissistic-abuse/) [Success](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/success/) ## Related quotes > [“But it is the nature of narcissistic entitlement to see the situation from only one very subjective point of view that says “My feelings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/but-it-is-the-nature-of-narcissistic-entitlement-to-see-the-situation/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“Narcissists are very retaliative if they believe another has achieved what they desire, exposed their insecurities, or refused to be under their control.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lorraine-nilon/narcissists-are-very-retaliative-if-they-believe-another-has-achieved/) [Lorraine Nilon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lorraine-nilon/) > [“After spending five decades of being beaten down, mistreated, and stabbed in the back, little Dana grew up. Little Dana fearlessly faced her trauma…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dana-arcuri-ctrc/after-spending-five-decades-of-being-beaten-down-mistreated-and/) [Dana Arcuri CTRC](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dana-arcuri-ctrc/) > [“As you recover, you will feel more conscious of your surroundings. Freed from the ‘fog’ of your pain, fear, and confusion, you will awaken…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beverly-engel/as-you-recover-you-will-feel-more-conscious-of-your-surroundings/) [Beverly Engel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beverly-engel/) > [“THE NO CONTACT RULE: 1. Zero contact; face to face & online. 2. No phone calls. 3. No text messaging. 4. No attending events…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dana-arcuri-ctrc/the-no-contact-rule-1-zero-contact-face-to-face-online-2-no-phone/) [Dana Arcuri CTRC](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dana-arcuri-ctrc/) > [“Someone's great blessing has sprung from a pain that you may not be able to endure. So, envy not the blessings they have, unless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-s-wolfe/someone-s-great-blessing-has-sprung-from-a-pain-that-you-may-not-be/) J.S. Wolfe > [“Healing from toxic relationship trauma is like realizing you spent your entire life eating and having allergic reactions to rotten tomatoes when life is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pamela-storch/healing-from-toxic-relationship-trauma-is-like-realizing-you-spent/) [Pamela Storch](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/pamela-storch/) > [“If it is your fault that your mother is miserable, it becomes a potentially fixable affront. Taking blame means that at least the hope…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/victoria-secunda/if-it-is-your-fault-that-your-mother-is-miserable-it-becomes-a/) [Victoria Secunda](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/victoria-secunda/) > [“You owe it to yourself to stand up and advocate for yourself. To not agree to what is harmful to you. To protect yourself…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dana-arcuri-ctrc/you-owe-it-to-yourself-to-stand-up-and-advocate-for-yourself-to-not/) [Dana Arcuri CTRC](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dana-arcuri-ctrc/) > [“Many survivors of a narcissist discover that they've sacrificed so much in an attempt to please the narcissist that they've lost sight of who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tracy-malone/many-survivors-of-a-narcissist-discover-that-they-ve-sacrificed-so/) Tracy Malone > [“When we meet and fall into the gravitational pull of a narcissist, we are entering a significant life lesson that involves learning how to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mateo-sol/when-we-meet-and-fall-into-the-gravitational-pull-of-a-narcissist-we/) [Mateo Sol](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mateo-sol/) > [“We all know someone who criticizes us to diminish our confidence or belittle our achievements. A person so disturbed, they project their insecurity onto…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carlos-wallace/we-all-know-someone-who-criticizes-us-to-diminish-our-confidence-or/) [Carlos Wallace](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carlos-wallace/) > [“Acknowledgment remained absent long-term. She would push to the point of sickness through drinking and activities that made recovery more difficult. She would refuse…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/neal-winsomer/acknowledgment-remained-absent-long-term-she-would-push-to-the-point/) Neal Winsomer > [“But that’s the thing about narcissists. They can try to fool you, with all their heart, but in the end, they’re just fooling themselves.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ellie-fox/but-that-s-the-thing-about-narcissists-they-can-try-to-fool-you-with/) [Ellie Fox](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ellie-fox/) > [“With gratitude, I have become a healing balm to thousands of people, if not more, who have suffered child abuse, sibling abuse, a dysfunctional…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dana-arcuri-ctrc/with-gratitude-i-have-become-a-healing-balm-to-thousands-of-people-if/) [Dana Arcuri CTRC](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dana-arcuri-ctrc/) ## More by Sandy Hotchkiss > [“If you find that you are frequently doing battle with or feeling seduced by such people, look to see what old problems you are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/if-you-find-that-you-are-frequently-doing-battle-with-or-feeling/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“Some of these arrangements involve an exhibitionist Narcissist and a partner who is “in the closet.” The closet Narcissist is an unassuming type who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/some-of-these-arrangements-involve-an-exhibitionist-narcissist-and-a/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“The narcissistic love match is inherently unstable. Any intrusion of reality can destabilize the relationship, leading to chronic or intermittent conflict, misery, trips to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/the-narcissistic-love-match-is-inherently-unstable-any-intrusion-of/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“Some narcissistic leaders are models of icy reserve while others have the emotional self-control of a two-year-old. … the essential narcissistic defect is not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/some-narcissistic-leaders-are-models-of-icy-reserve-while-others-have/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“But it is the nature of narcissistic entitlement to see the situation from only one very subjective point of view that says “My feelings…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/but-it-is-the-nature-of-narcissistic-entitlement-to-see-the-situation/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) > [“We all view life through the lens of these experiences, but the Narcissist has something more, not just a lens but a prism that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandy-hotchkiss/we-all-view-life-through-the-lens-of-these-experiences-but-the/) [Sandy Hotchkiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) [Explore all 7 Sandy Hotchkiss quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandy-hotchkiss/) ## More Entitlement quotes > [Nothing more guarantees the erosion of character than getting something for nothing. In the liberal welfare state, one develops an entitlement mentality. And the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dennis-prager/nothing-more-guarantees-the-erosion-of-character-than-getting/) [Dennis Prager](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dennis-prager/) > [When you're talking about long-term deficit reduction, $4 trillion worth, entitlement reform needs to be part of it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dick-durbin/when-you-re-talking-about-long-term-deficit-reduction-4-trillion/) [Dick Durbin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dick-durbin/) > [If God was the owner, I was the manager. I needed to adopt a steward's mentality toward the assets He had entrusted - not…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/randy-alcorn/if-god-was-the-owner-i-was-the-manager-i-needed-to-adopt-a-steward-s/) [Randy Alcorn](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/randy-alcorn/) > [It's clear that the medium and long-run fiscal challenges facing the country have to do with the rise of entitlement spending, they have to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/austan-goolsbee/it-s-clear-that-the-medium-and-long-run-fiscal-challenges-facing-the/) [Austan Goolsbee](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/austan-goolsbee/) > [I opposed the Medicare prescription drug entitlement. I opposed the Wall Street bailout. I opposed the stimulus bill.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mike-pence/i-opposed-the-medicare-prescription-drug-entitlement-i-opposed-the/) [Mike Pence](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mike-pence/) > [This strongly asserted but ill-defined license to kill without accountability is not an entitlement which the United States or other states can have without…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-alston/this-strongly-asserted-but-ill-defined-license-to-kill-without/) Philip Alston > [“Entitlement, I have told them, is a matter of feeling like we rather than they.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/dorothy-allison/entitlement-i-have-told-them-is-a-matter-of-feeling-like-we-rather/) [Dorothy Allison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/dorothy-allison/) > [So now that the illusion of infinite growth is being exposed, the corresponding ballooning entitlements that enticed the larger public to become complicit in…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-hugh-smith/so-now-that-the-illusion-of-infinite-growth-is-being-exposed-the/) [Charles Hugh Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-hugh-smith/) > [I don't trust art that promises a 24-hour joyride. In fact, there seems to be a modern sense of entitlement for such constant "ups,"…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-ware/i-don-t-trust-art-that-promises-a-24-hour-joyride-in-fact-there-seems/) [Chris Ware](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-ware/) > [“Because when you give too many fucks—when you give a fuck about everyone and everything—you will feel that you’re perpetually entitled to be comfortable…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-manson/because-when-you-give-too-many-fucks-when-you-give-a-fuck-about/) [Mark Manson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-manson/) > [“no man is above the law and that includes the president of the United States”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gloria-allred/no-man-is-above-the-law-and-that-includes-the-president-of-the-united/) [Gloria Allred](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gloria-allred/) > [Members of royal families are born into a world of indulgence and entitlement, and the princelings who grow up that way may never have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-kluger/members-of-royal-families-are-born-into-a-world-of-indulgence-and/) [Jeffrey Kluger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-kluger/) > [You have to demand things and believe you're worth more. And once you do demand them, you're usually going to get them. The players…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sue-wicks/you-have-to-demand-things-and-believe-you-re-worth-more-and-once-you/) [Sue Wicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sue-wicks/) > [Why is it that the very people who have fought so hard and so long for the simple entitlement to love whom they choose…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-ridley/why-is-it-that-the-very-people-who-have-fought-so-hard-and-so-long/) [John Ridley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-ridley/) > [I was surrounded by too many people who felt that they had a strong sense of entitlement. That I owed them something.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-jackson/i-was-surrounded-by-too-many-people-who-felt-that-they-had-a-strong/) [Curtis Jackson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-jackson/) [Browse all 437 Entitlement quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/entitlement/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“It is not worthiness the Narcissist feels when he or she communicates “I deserve.” Narcissistic entitlement has nothing to do with genuine self-esteem, which comes from real accomplishment and being true to one’s own ideals. Individuals who feel entitled to respect without giving it in return, or who expect rewards without effort, or a life free of discomfort, are forfeiting any power they might have to shape their own destiny. They assume an essentially passive role and count on outside forces to make them happy. When what they expect doesn’t happen, they feel impotent. 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