---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Elderly parents tend to think their…"
description: "\"Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with their middle-aged children is smoother than the children do. Adult grandchildren, who have little..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg"
---

#  Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with…

![“Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with their middle-aged children is smoother than the children do. Adult grandchildren, who have little stake in pulling away from their grandparents, tend to describe that relationship as less rose-colored than do Gram and Gramps.” quote by Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg)

> “Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with their middle-aged children is smoother than the children do. Adult grandchildren, who have little stake in pulling away from their grandparents, tend to describe that relationship as less rose-colored than do Gram and Gramps.”

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Older generations view family ties more positively than younger ones, who see complexities.

**In simple terms:** Perceptions differ across ages.

Key Takeaway

Acknowledge differing family views.

Themes

family dynamics generational perspective communication

Mood

thoughtful empathetic

Type

psychological sociological

When to use this quote

- Family counseling
- generational workshops
- personal journaling

Key Concepts

Intergenerational bias family expectations emotional truth

Questions to Reflect On

- Why do older adults see relationships more smoothly?
- How can families bridge these perception gaps?

A Different Perspective

Bias may overlook genuine issues.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Children](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/children/) [Elderly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/elderly/) [Grandchildren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grandchildren/) [Grandparents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/grandparents/) [Middle aged](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/middle-aged/) [Parenting](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parenting/) [Parents](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/parents/) [Relationship](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/relationship/)

## Related quotes

> [It is strange but true that although we may have learned all sorts of important facts while raising our own children, when we become…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eda-leshan/it-is-strange-but-true-that-although-we-may-have-learned-all-sorts-of/)

[Eda LeShan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eda-leshan/)

> [We want people to be less stressed about having health care and being able to afford health care or at-home care for their elderly…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-o-meara-sanders/we-want-people-to-be-less-stressed-about-having-health-care-and-being/)

[Jane O'Meara Sanders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-o-meara-sanders/)

> [“Elderly parents depend on love and respect for their physical and emotional health. Many times, that love is only available through companion care services…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/youinmindhcs/elderly-parents-depend-on-love-and-respect-for-their-physical-and/)

YouInMindHCS

> [My family kept its history to itself. On the plus side, I didn't have to hear nightmarish stories about the Holocaust, the pogroms, terrible…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-bloom/my-family-kept-its-history-to-itself-on-the-plus-side-i-didn-t-have/)

[Amy Bloom](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-bloom/)

> [I am a member of the 'sandwich' generation, that group that must simultaneously care for elderly parents and support children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sandra-tsing-loh/i-am-a-member-of-the-sandwich-generation-that-group-that-must/)

[Sandra Tsing Loh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sandra-tsing-loh/)

> [Even under the best of circumstances - in twenty-first century America at least - caring for elderly parents ain't no place for sissies.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/roz-chast/even-under-the-best-of-circumstances-in-twenty-first-century-america/)

[Roz Chast](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/roz-chast/)

> [The more we rely on the market, the more hooked we become on its promises: Do you need a tidier closet? A nicer family…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/arlie-russell-hochschild/the-more-we-rely-on-the-market-the-more-hooked-we-become-on-its/)

[Arlie Russell Hochschild](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/arlie-russell-hochschild/)

> [What about those who help growth indirectly, those who stay at home and look after others - mothers, carers of elderly parents or sick…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/noreena-hertz/what-about-those-who-help-growth-indirectly-those-who-stay-at-home/)

[Noreena Hertz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/noreena-hertz/)

> [“In the 1950s at least less was expected of women. Now we're supposed to build a career, build a home, be the supermum that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sara-sheridan/in-the-1950s-at-least-less-was-expected-of-women-now-we-re-supposed/)

[Sara Sheridan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sara-sheridan/)

> [With children who have never said a word, parents tend to assume, for better or for worse, that there isn't any language there.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrew-solomon/with-children-who-have-never-said-a-word-parents-tend-to-assume-for/)

[Andrew Solomon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrew-solomon/)

> [Needy and boring parents tend to have needy and bored children.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/amy-dickinson/needy-and-boring-parents-tend-to-have-needy-and-bored-children/)

[Amy Dickinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/amy-dickinson/)

> [As parents, we tend to be in Tell rather than Listen mode.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julian-treasure/as-parents-we-tend-to-be-in-tell-rather-than-listen-mode/)

[Julian Treasure](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julian-treasure/)

> [“As a consequence, very tall parents tend to have tall children, but not as tall (on average) as they are themselves;”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/thomas-gilovich/as-a-consequence-very-tall-parents-tend-to-have-tall-children-but-not/)

[Thomas Gilovich](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/thomas-gilovich/)

> [Especially with our first child, we tend to take too much responsibility--both credit and blame--for everything. The more we wantto be good parents, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/polly-berrien-berends/especially-with-our-first-child-we-tend-to-take-too-much/)

[Polly Berrien Berends](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/polly-berrien-berends/)

> [“Parents do tend to judge each other. I don’t know why. Maybe because none of us really know what we’re doing?”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/parents-do-tend-to-judge-each-other-i-don-t-know-why-maybe-because/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

## More by Robin Marantz Henig

> [There's very little about being in a functional-M.R.I. scanner that is natural: you are flat on your back, absolutely still, with your head immobilized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/there-s-very-little-about-being-in-a-functional-m-r-i-scanner-that-is/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [The English language has 112 words for deception, according to one count, each with a different shade of meaning: collusion, fakery, malingering, self-deception, confabulation,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/the-english-language-has-112-words-for-deception-according-to-one/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [I'm always made a little uncomfortable by studies that assert that Millennials are the most narcissistic generation in history. To me, being young has…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/i-m-always-made-a-little-uncomfortable-by-studies-that-assert-that/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [The tenuousness of modern life can make anyone feel overwrought.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/the-tenuousness-of-modern-life-can-make-anyone-feel-overwrought/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [The human brain has evolved the capacity to impose a narrative, complete with chronology and cause-and-effect logic, on whatever it encounters, no matter how…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/the-human-brain-has-evolved-the-capacity-to-impose-a-narrative/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [Hardships of early human life favored the evolution of certain cognitive tools, among them the ability to infer the presence of organisms that might…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/hardships-of-early-human-life-favored-the-evolution-of-certain/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [Many of us are tethered to bodies that sabotage us in our struggle to keep from getting fat, or to slim down when we…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/many-of-us-are-tethered-to-bodies-that-sabotage-us-in-our-struggle-to/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [Lies can be verbal or nonverbal, kindhearted or self-serving, devious or bald-faced; they can be lies of omission or lies of commission; they can…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/lies-can-be-verbal-or-nonverbal-kindhearted-or-self-serving-devious/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [For humans and animals alike, truly vigorous, wholehearted, spontaneous play is something of a biological frill.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/for-humans-and-animals-alike-truly-vigorous-wholehearted-spontaneous/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [Scientists who study play, in animals and humans alike, are developing a consensus view that play is something more than a way for restless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/scientists-who-study-play-in-animals-and-humans-alike-are-developing/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [The essence of play is that the sequence of actions is fluid and scattered.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/the-essence-of-play-is-that-the-sequence-of-actions-is-fluid-and/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [The real thing young people should fear is missing out on those few, true, long-term friendships that make for a richer, happier life.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/the-real-thing-young-people-should-fear-is-missing-out-on-those-few/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [As the brain matures, one thing that happens is the pruning of the synapses. Synaptic pruning does not occur willy-nilly; it depends largely on…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/as-the-brain-matures-one-thing-that-happens-is-the-pruning-of-the/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [It's almost a rite of passage for the middle-aged, it seems, to invent generational stereotypes for dumping on the young.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/it-s-almost-a-rite-of-passage-for-the-middle-aged-it-seems-to-invent/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

> [As people construct a life narrative, researchers have found, they tend to remember more events from the teens and twenties than from any other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/as-people-construct-a-life-narrative-researchers-have-found-they-tend/)

[Robin Marantz Henig](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

[Explore all 42 Robin Marantz Henig quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/)

## More Adult quotes

> [I feel as though I've fooled the world into thinking I'm an adult and now they're letting me procreate.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-murray/i-feel-as-though-i-ve-fooled-the-world-into-thinking-i-m-an-adult-and/)

[George Murray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-murray/)

> [There's always that discussion about fiction about how do you market it - these are books for boys, these are books for girls, these…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/l-a-weatherly/there-s-always-that-discussion-about-fiction-about-how-do-you-market/)

[L.A. Weatherly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/l-a-weatherly/)

> [I am a big outliner. For my adult book, 'The Visibles,' I did not outline, and it took me two years to write because…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sara-shepard/i-am-a-big-outliner-for-my-adult-book-the-visibles-i-did-not-outline/)

[Sara Shepard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sara-shepard/)

> [“The cactus thrives in the desert while the fern thrives in the wetland. The fool will try to plant them in the same flowerbox.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vera-nazarian/the-cactus-thrives-in-the-desert-while-the-fern-thrives-in-the/)

[Vera Nazarian](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vera-nazarian/)

> [I have spent my entire adult life trying to make Liberty University the world-class Christian university that was envisioned at its founding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-falwell-jr/i-have-spent-my-entire-adult-life-trying-to-make-liberty-university/)

[Jerry Falwell, Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-falwell-jr/)

> [“To love was a privilege not afforded to those of us born in these trying times when survival was never guaranteed. We were products…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/molly-x-chang/to-love-was-a-privilege-not-afforded-to-those-of-us-born-in-these/)

Molly X. Chang

> [Adults look upon a child as something empty that is to be filled through their own efforts, as something inert and helpless for which…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maria-montessori/adults-look-upon-a-child-as-something-empty-that-is-to-be-filled/)

[Maria Montessori](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maria-montessori/)

> [“English: "Being an adult doesn't mean killing the child we once were; it means being able to protect him." Česky: „Být dospělým neznamená zabít…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sebasti-n-wortys/english-being-an-adult-doesn-t-mean-killing-the-child-we-once-were-it/)

[Sebastián Wortys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sebasti-n-wortys/)

> [You know, children philosophize more than adults - and they are critical of adults.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nassim-nicholas-taleb/you-know-children-philosophize-more-than-adults-and-they-are-critical/)

[Nassim Nicholas Taleb](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nassim-nicholas-taleb/)

> [“There's such an intimate kind of beauty in the act of listening to music being created right in front of your eyes, watching the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/m-c-frank/there-s-such-an-intimate-kind-of-beauty-in-the-act-of-listening-to/)

[M.C. Frank](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/m-c-frank/)

> [Whether we think of Disney's blonde beauty and her pumpkin carriage or Marissa Meyer's recent recasting of 'Cinderella' as a cyborg in the young…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marie-rutkoski/whether-we-think-of-disney-s-blonde-beauty-and-her-pumpkin-carriage/)

[Marie Rutkoski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marie-rutkoski/)

> [You have, unfortunately, a K-12 educational system where the requirements to graduate are not the requirements to be college and career-ready. So if you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gerald-chertavian/you-have-unfortunately-a-k-12-educational-system-where-the/)

[Gerald Chertavian](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gerald-chertavian/)

> [Child actors going on to become adult actors never really works, apart from a few. Jodie Foster was the exception.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-lester/child-actors-going-on-to-become-adult-actors-never-really-works-apart/)

Mark Lester

> [Being an adult is the ability to postpone a want for the sake of a family need.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/chris-hogan/being-an-adult-is-the-ability-to-postpone-a-want-for-the-sake-of-a/)

[Chris Hogan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/chris-hogan/)

> [“Oh, I don’t mean to infer that you’re not a great guy. I’m sure you’re the exception to the rule.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jaye-frances/oh-i-don-t-mean-to-infer-that-you-re-not-a-great-guy-i-m-sure-you-re/)

Jaye Frances

Browse all 1,153 Adult quotes

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with their middle-aged children is smoother than the children do. Adult grandchildren, who have little stake in pulling away from their grandparents, tend to describe that relationship as less rose-colored than do Gram and Gramps.",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Robin Marantz Henig"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-relationship-with-their-middle/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Adult"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-relationship-with-their-middle/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/43e/robin-marantz-henig-15674_adult_elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-rela_2382703.jpg",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“Elderly parents tend to think their relationship with their middle-aged children is smoother than the…” — Robin Marantz Henig",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Robin Marantz Henig",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-marantz-henig/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "Elderly parents tend to think their...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-relationship-with-their-middle/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-marantz-henig/elderly-parents-tend-to-think-their-relationship-with-their-middle/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
