--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had…" description: "\"“By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had to recognize that happiness, as understood by youth, is illusory? That the best one can hope for is an absenc..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dc0/robin-black-30509_happiness_by-forty-is-there-anyone-who-hasn-t-had_930289.jpg" --- # By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had to recognize that… ![“By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had to recognize that happiness, as understood by youth, is illusory? That the best one can hope for is an absence of too many tragedies and that the road through the inevitable grief be, if not smooth, then steady?” quote by Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dc0/robin-black-30509_happiness_by-forty-is-there-anyone-who-hasn-t-had_930289.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dc0/robin-black-30509_happiness_by-forty-is-there-anyone-who-hasn-t-had_930289.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/dc0/robin-black-30509_happiness_by-forty-is-there-anyone-who-hasn-t-had_930289.jpg) > ““By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had to recognize that happiness, as understood by youth, is illusory? That the best one can hope for is an absence of too many tragedies and that the road through the inevitable grief be, if not smooth, then steady?”” [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. By midlife, happiness becomes elusive; the realistic goal is minimizing tragedies and maintaining steady resilience through inevitable grief. **In simple terms:** Happiness fades; aim for steady resilience despite grief. Key Takeaway Cultivate steady resilience. Themes midlife happiness grief Mood somber thoughtful Type philosophical inspirational When to use this quote - career planning - mental health - relationship building Key Concepts illusion of youth acceptance of suffering Questions to Reflect On - How do you define a good life after youth? - What practices help maintain steadiness? A Different Perspective Steady resilience may still involve pain. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Happiness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) ## Related quotes > [“Happiness is to be understood.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lada-ray/happiness-is-to-be-understood/) [Lada Ray](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lada-ray/) > [“True happiness if understood; consists alone in doing good;”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-molloy/true-happiness-if-understood-consists-alone-in-doing-good/) John Molloy > [When you look out into the world and you turn on the news and it's just so dark, it's still there. But it's the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lupe-fiasco/when-you-look-out-into-the-world-and-you-turn-on-the-news-and-it-s/) [Lupe Fiasco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lupe-fiasco/) > [Happiness is within the reach of everyone, rich or poor. Yet comparatively few people are happy. I believe the reason for this is that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-baden-powell/happiness-is-within-the-reach-of-everyone-rich-or-poor-yet/) [Robert Baden-Powell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-baden-powell/) > [You can only recognize your happiness against the background of suffering.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nhat-hanh/you-can-only-recognize-your-happiness-against-the-background-of/) [Nhat Hanh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nhat-hanh/) > [On the highway of life, we most often recognize happiness out of the rear view mirror](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frank-tyger/on-the-highway-of-life-we-most-often-recognize-happiness-out-of-the/) [Frank Tyger](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frank-tyger/) > [“We can recognize happiness only when we remember the times of suffering!”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/th-ch-nh-t-h-nh/we-can-recognize-happiness-only-when-we-remember-the-times-of/) [Thích Nhất Hạnh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/th-ch-nh-t-h-nh/) > [“It was beautiful. He thought he had never seen anything so beautiful in all his life; that, having seen it, he could die content,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mira-grant/it-was-beautiful-he-thought-he-had-never-seen-anything-so-beautiful/) [Mira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mira-grant/) > [Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/sing-like-no-one-s-listening-love-like-you-ve-never-been-hurt-dance/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [Sometimes we wish for the feel but we never understand that we have to give a lot to get the feel !](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reynolds/sometimes-we-wish-for-the-feel-but-we-never-understand-that-we-have/) [Robert Reynolds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reynolds/) > [I can skate beautifully. While performing on ice I always try to please the audience and to win as well. Being artistic is very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evgeni-plushenko/i-can-skate-beautifully-while-performing-on-ice-i-always-try-to/) [Evgeni Plushenko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evgeni-plushenko/) > [“WE CAN'T ALWAYS CONTROL OUR CIRCUMSTANCES BUT WE CAN CONTROL OUR ATTITUDE. WE MUST BE MORE CONCERNED WITH WHAT WE DO WITH WHAT HAPPENS…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marvin-j-ashton/we-can-t-always-control-our-circumstances-but-we-can-control-our/) [MARVIN J. ASHTON](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marvin-j-ashton/) > [Balance suggests a perfect equilibrium. There is no such thing. 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That's how we learn and grow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/life-is-full-of-change-that-s-how-we-learn-and-grow/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) ## More by Robin Black > [“I had confessed fully-with all the misguided passion of one who believes that she is cleansing herself and forgets that she may be staining…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/i-had-confessed-fully-with-all-the-misguided-passion-of-one-who/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“Rejection is part of the game. Or rather, rejection is part of the profession. A profession which at times can feel like a game.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/rejection-is-part-of-the-game-or-rather-rejection-is-part-of-the/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“This is where they failed, all those years back, he believes. In taking care of one another when tragedy struck. It broke them, broke…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/this-is-where-they-failed-all-those-years-back-he-believes-in-taking/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“The notion of a country cottage settled in her thoughts as a watercolor, red bricks, climbing roses, the house the most intelligent of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/the-notion-of-a-country-cottage-settled-in-her-thoughts-as-a/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“just graduated from Tufts—Laine”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/just-graduated-from-tufts-laine/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“It's unexpectedly painful to have become a pronoun.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/it-s-unexpectedly-painful-to-have-become-a-pronoun/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“... all of it conspiring to carry them through those first few minutes and through the front door of the house with a lightness…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/all-of-it-conspiring-to-carry-them-through-those-first-few-minutes/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) > [“You cannot write the pages you love without writing the pages you hate. 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I’m pretty sure we must have seemed…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robin-black/there-were-some-kids-at-tufts-who-had-been-in-the-army-but-they/) [Robin Black](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) [Explore all 17 Robin Black quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robin-black/) ## More Happiness quotes > [Life is full of change. That's how we learn and grow.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/life-is-full-of-change-that-s-how-we-learn-and-grow/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Remember that your natural state is joy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wayne-dyer/remember-that-your-natural-state-is-joy/) [Wayne Dyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/wayne-dyer/) > [Balance suggests a perfect equilibrium. There is no such thing. 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Being artistic is very…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evgeni-plushenko/i-can-skate-beautifully-while-performing-on-ice-i-always-try-to/) [Evgeni Plushenko](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evgeni-plushenko/) > [Sometimes we wish for the feel but we never understand that we have to give a lot to get the feel !](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/robert-reynolds/sometimes-we-wish-for-the-feel-but-we-never-understand-that-we-have/) [Robert Reynolds](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/robert-reynolds/) > [Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/sing-like-no-one-s-listening-love-like-you-ve-never-been-hurt-dance/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [“It was beautiful. He thought he had never seen anything so beautiful in all his life; that, having seen it, he could die content,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mira-grant/it-was-beautiful-he-thought-he-had-never-seen-anything-so-beautiful/) [Mira Grant](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mira-grant/) > [The happy have whole days,](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colley-cibber/the-happy-have-whole-days/) [Colley Cibber](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colley-cibber/) > [I have observed this in my experience of slavery, - that whenever my condition was improved, instead of its increasing my contentment, it only…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-douglass/i-have-observed-this-in-my-experience-of-slavery-that-whenever-my/) [Frederick Douglass](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-douglass/) > [I've got nothing to do today but smile.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-ve-got-nothing-to-do-today-but-smile/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [Her dignity consists in being unknown to the world; her glory is in the esteem of her husband; her pleasures in the happiness of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jean-jacques-rousseau/her-dignity-consists-in-being-unknown-to-the-world-her-glory-is-in/) [Jean-Jacques Rousseau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jean-jacques-rousseau/) > [The size of a man's understanding might always be justly measured by his mirth.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samuel-johnson/the-size-of-a-man-s-understanding-might-always-be-justly-measured-by/) [Samuel Johnson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samuel-johnson/) > [Positive thinking evokes more energy, more initiative, more happiness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/positive-thinking-evokes-more-energy-more-initiative-more-happiness/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [When you have a choice, choose happy!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/pancho-barnes/when-you-have-a-choice-choose-happy/) Pancho Barnes [Browse all 40,288 Happiness quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/happiness/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“By forty, is there anyone who hasn’t had to recognize that happiness, as understood by youth, is illusory? 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