---
title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: It’s not human to let go of love, even…"
description: "\"“It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We expected one of these monthly anniversaries to be the Final Goodbye. We figured that we’d sa..."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png"
---

#  It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We…

![“It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We expected one of these monthly anniversaries to be the Final Goodbye. We figured that we’d said all our goodbyes, and given up all the tears we had to give. We’d passed the test and would get back what we’d lost. But instead, every…” quote by Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png)   [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png)

> ““It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We expected one of these monthly anniversaries to be the Final Goodbye. We figured that we’d said all our goodbyes, and given up all the tears we had to give. We’d passed the test and would get back what we’d lost. But instead, every anniversary it hurt more, and every anniversary it felt like she was further away from coming back. The idea that there wouldn’t be a final goodbye—that was a hard goodbye to say in itself and, at that point, still an impossible goodbye. No private eye has to tell you it’s a long goodbye.””

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

## About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

The passage reflects on the lingering pain of love after loss, describing an ongoing, unresolved grief that feels endless and increasingly painful.

**In simple terms:** Love’s loss can feel like an endless, painful goodbye.

Key Takeaway

Accept that grief may be a long, evolving process.

Themes

grief love loss acceptance emotional endurance

Mood

melancholic reflective

Type

literary emotional

When to use this quote

- personal loss
- relationship endings
- anniversary reflections
- mental health coping strategies

Key Concepts

psychology human experience

Questions to Reflect On

- How do you navigate recurring grief?
- What does “hard goodbye” mean to you?

A Different Perspective

May romanticize suffering and ignore healing possibilities.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★   No ratings yet

[Anniversary](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anniversary/) [Anniversary Hurt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anniversary-hurt-1478085/) [Final Goodbye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/final-goodbye/) [Goodbye Private](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/goodbye-private-4870567/) [Hard Goodbye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hard-goodbye-4870568/) [Impossible Goodbye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/impossible-goodbye-1478088/) [Long Goodbye](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/long-goodbye-1220493/) [Love](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/love/)

## Related quotes

> [“on the 11th of every month my friend elizabeth would say, "well we made it through another month. so do we get her back…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/on-the-11th-of-every-month-my-friend-elizabeth-would-say-well-we-made/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [~Goodbye to you, its been a long time, so I'm here to say I'm Gone for good. thats okay you hurt me and you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/she-s-gone/goodbye-to-you-its-been-a-long-time-so-i-m-here-to-say-i-m-gone-for/)

[She's\_gone](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/she-s-gone/)

> [“I thought about a line from Raymond Chandler in The Long Goodbye that I always remembered—and it somehow seemed to fit both of us.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/r-g-belsky/i-thought-about-a-line-from-raymond-chandler-in-the-long-goodbye-that/)

[R. G. Belsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/r-g-belsky/)

> [There's a long goodbye,and it happens every day,when a passerbyinvites your eyeto come away.Even as you smile a quick helloyou let her go,you let…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/johnny-mercer/there-s-a-long-goodbye-and-it-happens-every-day-when-a/)

[Johnny Mercer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/johnny-mercer/)

> [This is a long goodbye, yet not time enough. I have no aptitude for this. I cannot learn this. I would hold on, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/juliet-marillier/this-is-a-long-goodbye-yet-not-time-enough-i-have-no-aptitude-for/)

[Juliet Marillier](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/juliet-marillier/)

> [“I turned back to the television. After a while what I was staring at registered. “Hey, this is The Long Goodbye ." Jake opened…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/josh-lanyon/i-turned-back-to-the-television-after-a-while-what-i-was-staring-at/)

[Josh Lanyon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/josh-lanyon/)

> [A couple of my favourite cop movies are 'I Love a Man in Uniform' and 'The Long Goodbye.'](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gregory-smith/a-couple-of-my-favourite-cop-movies-are-i-love-a-man-in-uniform-and/)

[Gregory Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gregory-smith/)

> [The woman who died night after night and her dying was a long goodbye, a train that never left.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/octavio-paz/the-woman-who-died-night-after-night-and-her-dying-was-a-long-goodbye/)

[Octavio Paz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/octavio-paz/)

> [I'm a big fan of Robert Altman, and one of the things I love in 'The Long Goodbye' is the way that he plays…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/keith-maitland/i-m-a-big-fan-of-robert-altman-and-one-of-the-things-i-love-in-the/)

[Keith Maitland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/keith-maitland/)

> [When I was in college, there were dollar movie nights. I went to see 'The Long Goodbye,' which was based on one of Chandler's…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-connelly/when-i-was-in-college-there-were-dollar-movie-nights-i-went-to-see/)

[Michael Connelly](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-connelly/)

> [The Long Goodbye' is one book I like to read over and over again, and it was an enormous inspiration for 'All The Wrong…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-handler/the-long-goodbye-is-one-book-i-like-to-read-over-and-over-again-and/)

[Daniel Handler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-handler/)

> [Millions of couples out there practiced the art of sadomasochism every day, without even realizing it. They went to work, came back, complained about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/paulo-coelho/millions-of-couples-out-there-practiced-the-art-of-sadomasochism/)

[Paulo Coelho](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/paulo-coelho/)

> [“As we say our final goodbyes here today, let us carry forward the lessons of Kyle's life and continue to weave the fabric of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lo-monaco/as-we-say-our-final-goodbyes-here-today-let-us-carry-forward-the/)

[Lo Monaco](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lo-monaco/)

> [“Weird sunshower around three. Linda Hertney: It's like a final goodbye from Todd. (Linda = nut. Once claimed crow on ledge was reincarnation of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-saunders/weird-sunshower-around-three-linda-hertney-it-s-like-a-final-goodbye/)

[George Saunders](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-saunders/)

> [Feel my pain with the pen, hoping my words of joys and sin can be felt before the end. This is where I begin…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/raghib-clitso/feel-my-pain-with-the-pen-hoping-my-words-of-joys-and-sin-can-be-felt/)

[Raghib Clitso](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/raghib-clitso/)

## More by Rob Sheffield

> [One of the best moments of any Liars show is hearing the crowd squawk 'We're doomed! We're doomed!' on cue during 'We Fenced Other…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/one-of-the-best-moments-of-any-liars-show-is-hearing-the-crowd-squawk/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“I suck at fighting. I have never really learned how to talk and be mad at the same time. If I have angry words…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/i-suck-at-fighting-i-have-never-really-learned-how-to-talk-and-be-mad/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [Morrissey was my Mrs. Garrett, the house mother from the Facts of Life, a soothing adult figure giving me words of wisdom.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/morrissey-was-my-mrs-garrett-the-house-mother-from-the-facts-of-life/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“I had never gotten the hang of dating — I was always going to be somebody who either had a girlfriend or didn't.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/i-had-never-gotten-the-hang-of-dating-i-was-always-going-to-be/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [The hottest trash-disco star in the world: Ke$ha! She has a lot in common with Kiss, actually, even spelling her name with a dollar…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/the-hottest-trash-disco-star-in-the-world-ke-ha-she-has-a-lot-in/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“on the 11th of every month my friend elizabeth would say, "well we made it through another month. so do we get her back…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/on-the-11th-of-every-month-my-friend-elizabeth-would-say-well-we-made/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“What doesn't kill you maims you, cripples you, leaves you weak, makes you whiny and full of yourself at the same time. The more…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/what-doesn-t-kill-you-maims-you-cripples-you-leaves-you-weak-makes/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“But when you're a teenage boy, you can be narrow-minded about things that are girlie, things that are frivolous, things that are pop. Boys…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/but-when-you-re-a-teenage-boy-you-can-be-narrow-minded-about-things/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“I've never heard of anybody getting rid of their prized Exile postcards, much less actually writing on them and sending them through the mail…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/i-ve-never-heard-of-anybody-getting-rid-of-their-prized-exile/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [It's always that one song that gets to you. You can hide, but the song comes to find you.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/it-s-always-that-one-song-that-gets-to-you-you-can-hide-but-the-song/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [There are all kinds of mix tapes. there is always a reason to make one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/there-are-all-kinds-of-mix-tapes-there-is-always-a-reason-to-make-one/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“By the time you're an adult, you're used to seeing your friends disappear into their five-year plans. They drop out to get married, have…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/by-the-time-you-re-an-adult-you-re-used-to-seeing-your-friends/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“Last fall, I was sitting at the kitchen table of two friends who have been together since 1972. They tell me a story about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/last-fall-i-was-sitting-at-the-kitchen-table-of-two-friends-who-have/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [Tonight, I feel like my whole body is made out of memories. I'm a mix-tape, a cassette that's been rewound so many times you…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/tonight-i-feel-like-my-whole-body-is-made-out-of-memories-i-m-a-mix/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

> [“You're in a physical landscape you share with this bizarre and fundamentally alien creature, not alien because she's female but alien because you're a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/you-re-in-a-physical-landscape-you-share-with-this-bizarre-and/)

[Rob Sheffield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

[Explore all 249 Rob Sheffield quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/)

## More Anniversary quotes

> [I know that sometimes I am hard to deal with. Still, you manage to stay by my side. Thank you for just being there…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-know-that-sometimes-i-am-hard-to-deal-with-still-you-manage-to-stay/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [As a rule, I am very skeptical of tying books to anniversaries. I don't think readers care. I also feel that it just about…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erik-larson/as-a-rule-i-am-very-skeptical-of-tying-books-to-anniversaries-i-don-t/)

[Erik Larson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erik-larson/)

> [Part of me believes that Beyonce and Jay-Z were naive when they chose to celebrate their five-year wedding anniversary in Cuba. However, as the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mercedes-schlapp/part-of-me-believes-that-beyonce-and-jay-z-were-naive-when-they-chose/)

[Mercedes Schlapp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mercedes-schlapp/)

> [In the spring of 1984, I went to the northwest of France, to Normandy, to prepare an NBC documentary on the 40th anniversary of D-Day.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tom-brokaw/in-the-spring-of-1984-i-went-to-the-northwest-of-france-to-normandy/)

[Tom Brokaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tom-brokaw/)

> [I want to wish an anniversary day to a couple who is beautiful in entire land. May your anniversary enhance your love and understanding.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-want-to-wish-an-anniversary-day-to-a-couple-who-is-beautiful-in/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Today marks the first anniversary of me remembering when your anniversary is.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/today-marks-the-first-anniversary-of-me-remembering-when-your/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [There is no greater reason for children to honour parents than for parents to honour children except, that while the children are young, the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bertrand-russell/there-is-no-greater-reason-for-children-to-honour-parents-than-for/)

[Bertrand Russell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bertrand-russell/)

> [You had turned my life to a poem and its rhythm makes my dears and nears to rejoice ever and ever Happy Anniversary to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/you-had-turned-my-life-to-a-poem-and-its-rhythm-makes-my-dears-and/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

> [Heaven give you many, many merry days.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/heaven-give-you-many-many-merry-days/)

[William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/)

> [Last week, the House of Representatives passed a resolution honoring the victims and heroes of September 11th. As we commemorate the anniversary of 9-11,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/michael-mccaul/last-week-the-house-of-representatives-passed-a-resolution-honoring/)

[Michael McCaul](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/michael-mccaul/)

> [A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ogden-nash/a-husband-is-a-guy-who-tells-you-when-you-ve-got-on-too-much-lipstick/)

[Ogden Nash](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ogden-nash/)

> [“Approaching each other, him from the gym, me from the library- this was when I walked down the aisle and he was waiting, this…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/curtis-sittenfeld/approaching-each-other-him-from-the-gym-me-from-the-library-this-was/)

[Curtis Sittenfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/curtis-sittenfeld/)

> [Happy anniversary Mom and Dad. Even through those occasional times when we didn't get along, I could still that tell your love for me…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jin/happy-anniversary-mom-and-dad-even-through-those-occasional-times/)

[Jin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jin/)

> [One of the good things that come of a true marriage is, that there is one face on which changes come without your seeing…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/george-macdonald/one-of-the-good-things-that-come-of-a-true-marriage-is-that-there-is/)

[George MacDonald](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/george-macdonald/)

> [Because since there's no more you. There's no more anniversary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ne-yo/because-since-there-s-no-more-you-there-s-no-more-anniversary/)

[Ne-yo](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ne-yo/)

[Browse all 455 Anniversary quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/anniversary/)

```json
{
    "@context": "https://schema.org",
    "@graph": [
        {
            "@type": "Quotation",
            "text": "“It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We expected one of these monthly anniversaries to be the Final Goodbye. We figured that we’d said all our goodbyes, and given up all the tears we had to give. We’d passed the test and would get back what we’d lost. But instead, every anniversary it hurt more, and every anniversary it felt like she was further away from coming back. The idea that there wouldn’t be a final goodbye—that was a hard goodbye to say in itself and, at that point, still an impossible goodbye. No private eye has to tell you it’s a long goodbye.”",
            "creator": {
                "@type": "Person",
                "name": "Rob Sheffield"
            },
            "isPartOf": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website"
            },
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-when-it-s-dead-we-expected-one/",
            "about": {
                "@type": "Thing",
                "name": "Anniversary"
            },
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-when-it-s-dead-we-expected-one/#quotation",
            "image": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png",
                "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/393/rob-sheffield-1368_anniversary_it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-wh_2206756.png",
                "width": 1080,
                "height": 1080,
                "caption": "“It’s not human to let go of love, even when it’s dead. We expected one of these monthly anniversaries to be…” — Rob Sheffield",
                "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
                "creator": {
                    "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
                }
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "BreadcrumbList",
            "itemListElement": [
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 1,
                    "name": "Home",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 2,
                    "name": "Quotes",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 3,
                    "name": "Rob Sheffield",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-sheffield/"
                },
                {
                    "@type": "ListItem",
                    "position": 4,
                    "name": "“It’s not human to let go...",
                    "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-when-it-s-dead-we-expected-one/"
                }
            ],
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-sheffield/it-s-not-human-to-let-go-of-love-even-when-it-s-dead-we-expected-one/#breadcrumb"
        },
        {
            "@type": "WebSite",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "publisher": {
                "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization"
            }
        },
        {
            "@type": "Organization",
            "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization",
            "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes",
            "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/",
            "logo": {
                "@type": "ImageObject",
                "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png",
                "width": 512,
                "height": 512
            }
        }
    ]
}
```
