--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: To be always thinking about your manners…" description: "\"To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to make them good; the very perfection of manners is not to think about yourself.\" — Richard Wh..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png" --- # To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to… ![“To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to make them good; the very perfection of manners is not to think about yourself.” quote by Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png) > “To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to make them good; the very perfection of manners is not to think about yourself.” [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. True manners arise naturally, not from self-conscious effort; perfection is achieved by humility, not self‑monitoring. **In simple terms:** Good manners come from humility. Key Takeaway Practice humility for natural courtesy. Themes etiquette humility selflessness Mood reflective calm Type philosophical educational When to use this quote - daily interactions - education - leadership Key Concepts social conduct philosophy Questions to Reflect On - How can you cultivate genuine courtesy? - What habits help you act without self‑consciousness? A Different Perspective Overemphasis on self‑monitoring can cause anxiety. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Manners](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/manners/) [Perfection](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perfection/) [Thinking](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/thinking/) ## Related quotes > [Manners are a way of getting what you want without appearing to be an absolute swine.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/quentin-crisp/manners-are-a-way-of-getting-what-you-want-without-appearing-to-be-an/) [Quentin Crisp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/quentin-crisp/) > [~I'm strict about manners. I think that kids have a horrible time with other people if they have bad manners… The one thing you've…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emma-thompson/i-m-strict-about-manners-i-think-that-kids-have-a-horrible-time-with/) [Emma Thompson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emma-thompson/) > [I have a respect for manners as such, they are a way of dealing with people you don't agree with or like.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-mead/i-have-a-respect-for-manners-as-such-they-are-a-way-of-dealing-with/) [Margaret Mead](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/margaret-mead/) > [what we need in the world is manners ... I think that if, instead of preaching brotherly love, we preached good manners, we might…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eleanor-roosevelt/what-we-need-in-the-world-is-manners-i-think-that-if-instead-of/) [Eleanor Roosevelt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eleanor-roosevelt/) > [If I say to my daughter, "Go say 'hi' to Aunt Gertrude," there is a reason there. I'm teaching her manners. I think the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/if-i-say-to-my-daughter-go-say-hi-to-aunt-gertrude-there-is-a-reason/) [Marianne Williamson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marianne-williamson/) > [Manners are one of the greatest engines of influence ever given to man.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/manners-are-one-of-the-greatest-engines-of-influence-ever-given-to-man/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Good manners are a part of good morals.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/good-manners-are-a-part-of-good-morals/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Better too much form than too little.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/better-too-much-form-than-too-little/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, of ungraceful and gilded forms of charitable…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/the-highest-perfection-of-politeness-is-only-a-beautiful-edifice/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [Your idea of fidelity is not having more than one man in bed at the same time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederic-raphael/your-idea-of-fidelity-is-not-having-more-than-one-man-in-bed-at-the/) [Frederic Raphael](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederic-raphael/) > [My grandparents were far more English in their manners than they were Chinese. For example, we spoke English at home, had afternoon tea every…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-kwan/my-grandparents-were-far-more-english-in-their-manners-than-they-were/) [Kevin Kwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-kwan/) > [To follow good manners willingly is like paving the road and to tell somebody to follow them is like the road which is always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikrant-parsai/to-follow-good-manners-willingly-is-like-paving-the-road-and-to-tell/) [Vikrant Parsai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikrant-parsai/) > [To be polite to everybody except the people they love most is a nervous affectation that afflicts many families ... when they come home,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-fishback/to-be-polite-to-everybody-except-the-people-they-love-most-is-a/) Margaret Fishback > [I don't do plays without jokes anymore. I've retired from those plays. I think it's bad manners to invite people to sit in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-nighy/i-don-t-do-plays-without-jokes-anymore-i-ve-retired-from-those-plays/) [Bill Nighy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-nighy/) > [Good manners are not bred in moments, but in years.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-mcnair-wright/good-manners-are-not-bred-in-moments-but-in-years/) [Julia McNair Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-mcnair-wright/) ## More by Richard Whately > [It is worth noticing that those who assume an imposing demeanor and seek to pass themselves off for something beyond what they are, are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/it-is-worth-noticing-that-those-who-assume-an-imposing-demeanor-and/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Of Rhetoric various definitions have been given by different writers; who, however, seem not so much to have disagreed in their conceptions of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/of-rhetoric-various-definitions-have-been-given-by-different-writers/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [The power of duly appreciating little things belongs to a great mind...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/the-power-of-duly-appreciating-little-things-belongs-to-a-great-mind/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Falsehood, like the dry-rot, flourishes the more in proportion as air and light are excluded.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/falsehood-like-the-dry-rot-flourishes-the-more-in-proportion-as-air/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Of all hostile feelings, envy is perhaps the hardest to be subdued, because hardly any one owns it even to himself, but looks out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/of-all-hostile-feelings-envy-is-perhaps-the-hardest-to-be-subdued/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [knowledge of our duties is the most useful part of philosophy.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/knowledge-of-our-duties-is-the-most-useful-part-of-philosophy/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Geologists complain that when they want specimens of the common rocks of a country, they receive curious spars; just so, historians give us the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/geologists-complain-that-when-they-want-specimens-of-the-common-rocks/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Reason can no more influence the will, and operate as a motive, than the eyes which show a man his road can enable him…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/reason-can-no-more-influence-the-will-and-operate-as-a-motive-than/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Eloquence is relative. One can no more pronounce on the eloquence of any composition than the wholesomeness of a medicine, without knowing for whom…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/eloquence-is-relative-one-can-no-more-pronounce-on-the-eloquence-of/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Falsehood, like poison, will generally be rejected when administered alone; but when blended with wholesome ingredients may be swallowed unperceived.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/falsehood-like-poison-will-generally-be-rejected-when-administered/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Happiness is no laughing matter.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/happiness-is-no-laughing-matter/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Though not always called upon to condemn ourselves, it is always safe to suspect ourselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/though-not-always-called-upon-to-condemn-ourselves-it-is-always-safe/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Even supposing there were some spiritual advantage in celibacy, it ought to be completely voluntary.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/even-supposing-there-were-some-spiritual-advantage-in-celibacy-it/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [Some men's reputation seems like seed-wheat, which thrives best when brought from a distance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/some-men-s-reputation-seems-like-seed-wheat-which-thrives-best-when/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) > [He who is not aware of his ignorance will be only misled by his knowledge.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/he-who-is-not-aware-of-his-ignorance-will-be-only-misled-by-his/) [Richard Whately](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) [Explore all 119 Richard Whately quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/) ## More Manners quotes > [Good manners are not bred in moments, but in years.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julia-mcnair-wright/good-manners-are-not-bred-in-moments-but-in-years/) [Julia McNair Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julia-mcnair-wright/) > [Your idea of fidelity is not having more than one man in bed at the same time.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederic-raphael/your-idea-of-fidelity-is-not-having-more-than-one-man-in-bed-at-the/) [Frederic Raphael](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederic-raphael/) > [My grandparents were far more English in their manners than they were Chinese. For example, we spoke English at home, had afternoon tea every…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kevin-kwan/my-grandparents-were-far-more-english-in-their-manners-than-they-were/) [Kevin Kwan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kevin-kwan/) > [To be polite to everybody except the people they love most is a nervous affectation that afflicts many families ... when they come home,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/margaret-fishback/to-be-polite-to-everybody-except-the-people-they-love-most-is-a/) Margaret Fishback > [I don't do plays without jokes anymore. I've retired from those plays. I think it's bad manners to invite people to sit in the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bill-nighy/i-don-t-do-plays-without-jokes-anymore-i-ve-retired-from-those-plays/) [Bill Nighy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bill-nighy/) > [To follow good manners willingly is like paving the road and to tell somebody to follow them is like the road which is always…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikrant-parsai/to-follow-good-manners-willingly-is-like-paving-the-road-and-to-tell/) [Vikrant Parsai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikrant-parsai/) > [The only way to have a funeral is to invite everyone who ever knew the person and just wait for the accident to happen-somebody…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/philip-roth/the-only-way-to-have-a-funeral-is-to-invite-everyone-who-ever-knew/) [Philip Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/philip-roth/) > [“What a nice thing to say," Mom said, standing up a little straighter, as if she'd been watered. Marlena's manners were unpracticed, but she…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-buntin/what-a-nice-thing-to-say-mom-said-standing-up-a-little-straighter-as/) [Julie Buntin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-buntin/) > [The highest perfection of politeness is only a beautiful edifice, built, from the base to the dome, of ungraceful and gilded forms of charitable…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mark-twain/the-highest-perfection-of-politeness-is-only-a-beautiful-edifice/) [Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mark-twain/) > [I have been missing the point. The point is not knowing another person, or learning to love another person. The point is simply this:…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rebecca-wells/i-have-been-missing-the-point-the-point-is-not-knowing-another-person/) [Rebecca Wells](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rebecca-wells/) > [One man lies in his words, and gets a bad reputation; another in his manners, and enjoys a good one.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-david-thoreau/one-man-lies-in-his-words-and-gets-a-bad-reputation-another-in-his/) [Henry David Thoreau](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-david-thoreau/) > [“...the pleasantness of an employment does not always evince its propriety.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jane-austen/the-pleasantness-of-an-employment-does-not-always-evince-its-propriety/) [Jane Austen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jane-austen/) > [Politics has rough manners, but it is a very useful thing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bernard-crick/politics-has-rough-manners-but-it-is-a-very-useful-thing/) [Bernard Crick](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bernard-crick/) > [It's my firm conclusion that human meaning comes from humans, not from a supernatural source. After we die, our hopes for an afterlife reside…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/greg-graffin/it-s-my-firm-conclusion-that-human-meaning-comes-from-humans-not-from/) [Greg Graffin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/greg-graffin/) > [“In years gone by, particularly in the East and the South, ladies would attend charm school to learn how to elegantly stand, sit, dance,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-c-young/in-years-gone-by-particularly-in-the-east-and-the-south-ladies-would/) [Susan C. Young](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-c-young/) [Browse all 1,635 Manners quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/manners/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to make them good; the very perfection of manners is not to think about yourself.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Richard Whately" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners-is-not-the-way-to-make-them/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Manners" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners-is-not-the-way-to-make-them/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/804/richard-whately-3892_manners_to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners_438969.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“To be always thinking about your manners is not the way to make them good; the very perfection of manners is…” — Richard Whately", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Richard Whately", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-whately/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "To be always thinking about your...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners-is-not-the-way-to-make-them/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-whately/to-be-always-thinking-about-your-manners-is-not-the-way-to-make-them/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```