--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and…" description: "\"Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and leads to smoldering resentment, which will make us miserable until it kills us. Resentment destroys the perce..." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acd/richard-walters-70015_ability_not-forgiving-prolongs-hurt-and-anger-an_26758.jpg" --- # Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and leads to… ![“Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and leads to smoldering resentment, which will make us miserable until it kills us. Resentment destroys the perception of reality. As we try to bend the world to accommodate our resentment, fear, and selfishness, we become less accurate in understanding the…” quote by Richard Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acd/richard-walters-70015_ability_not-forgiving-prolongs-hurt-and-anger-an_26758.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acd/richard-walters-70015_ability_not-forgiving-prolongs-hurt-and-anger-an_26758.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/acd/richard-walters-70015_ability_not-forgiving-prolongs-hurt-and-anger-an_26758.jpg) > “Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and leads to smoldering resentment, which will make us miserable until it kills us. Resentment destroys the perception of reality. As we try to bend the world to accommodate our resentment, fear, and selfishness, we become less accurate in understanding the world. This eventually destroys our ability to cope successfully with life.” [Richard Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-walters/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Holding onto grudges fuels ongoing pain, distorts reality, and impairs our capacity to navigate life effectively. **In simple terms:** Resentment clouds perception and harms well‑being. Key Takeaway Letting go restores clarity and resilience. Themes emotional health psychology personal growth mindfulness relationships Mood reflective somber hopeful Type advice philosophical motivational When to use this quote - after a betrayal - during chronic conflict - when feeling victimized - in a toxic workplace Key Concepts resentment forgiveness cognitive distortion self‑awareness Practical Applications - therapy or counseling - mindfulness practice Questions to Reflect On - What patterns keep you stuck in resentment? - How might releasing anger change your view of a situation? A Different Perspective Forgiveness can be challenging and may not always be appropriate if it enables ongoing abuse. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet [Ability](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ability/) [Accommodate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/accommodate/) [Accommodate Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/accommodate-resentment-414177/) [Accurate](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/accurate/) [Bitterness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/bitterness/) [Forgiveness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiveness/) [Forgiving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/forgiving/) [Hurt](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/hurt/) [Miserable](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/miserable/) [Not forgiving](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/not-forgiving/) [Perception](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perception/) [Perception Of Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perception-of-reality/) [Perception reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/perception-reality/) [Reality](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/reality/) [Resentment](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment/) [Resentment Destroys](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment-destroys-414176/) [Resentment Fear](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/resentment-fear-414178/) [Selfishness](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/selfishness/) [Trying](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/trying/) [Understanding](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understanding/) [Understanding the world](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/understanding-the-world/) [World](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/world/) ## Related quotes > [My sister stood up, trembling, and I must admit that I expected her familiar sneer to have taken its usual place on her face.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/j-robert-lennon/my-sister-stood-up-trembling-and-i-must-admit-that-i-expected-her/) [J. Robert Lennon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/j-robert-lennon/) > [By not forgiving, by not letting wrongs go, we aren't getting back at anyone. We are merely punishing ourselves by barricading our own hearts.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jim-cymbala/by-not-forgiving-by-not-letting-wrongs-go-we-aren-t-getting-back-at/) [Jim Cymbala](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jim-cymbala/) > [When you remain angry with another person, you give away your emotional control to that person each time you think of him or here.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/brian-tracy/when-you-remain-angry-with-another-person-you-give-away-your/) [Brian Tracy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/brian-tracy/) > [Take then this Book, look into it, and show me when Jesus was not forgiving. Read this diving tragedy and tell me where He…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/khalil-gibran/take-then-this-book-look-into-it-and-show-me-when-jesus-was-not/) [Khalil Gibran](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/khalil-gibran/) > [The narratives we create in order to justify our actions and choices become in so many ways who we are. They are the things…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cheryl-strayed/the-narratives-we-create-in-order-to-justify-our-actions-and-choices-2/) [Cheryl Strayed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cheryl-strayed/) > [In fact, not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anne-lamott/in-fact-not-forgiving-is-like-drinking-rat-poison-and-then-waiting/) [Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anne-lamott/) > [“I can forgive, but I cannot forget,” is only another way of saying, “I will not forgive.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/henry-ward-beecher/i-can-forgive-but-i-cannot-forget-is-only-another-way-of-saying-i-3/) [Henry Ward Beecher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/henry-ward-beecher/) > [Not forgiving someone hurts you worse than it hurts him...even if he doesn't deserve to be forgiven...Not forgiving someone is like not pulling a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/mercedes-lackey/not-forgiving-someone-hurts-you-worse-than-it-hurts-him-even-if-he/) [Mercedes Lackey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/mercedes-lackey/) > [Not forgiving somebody is like drinking poison and hoping that the offender will get sick.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-smalley/not-forgiving-somebody-is-like-drinking-poison-and-hoping-that-the/) [Gary Smalley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-smalley/) > [How many times should you forgive your household bruiser? You should not even think about forgiving him. Not yet. Not as long as he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-b-smedes/how-many-times-should-you-forgive-your-household-bruiser-you-should/) [Lewis B. Smedes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-b-smedes/) > [Not to forgive is to be imprisoned by the past, by old grievances that do not permit life to proceed with new business.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lance-morrow/not-to-forgive-is-to-be-imprisoned-by-the-past-by-old-grievances-that-2/) [Lance Morrow](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lance-morrow/) > [The Long Earth is bountiful but not forgiving.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-baxter/the-long-earth-is-bountiful-but-not-forgiving/) [Stephen Baxter](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-baxter/) > [Take it slowly. The deepest resentments are wrapped up in a lot of hurt and pain. We think we're protecting ourselves by not forgiving.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/howard-martin/take-it-slowly-the-deepest-resentments-are-wrapped-up-in-a-lot-of/) [Howard Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/howard-martin/) > [Forgiving does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/lewis-b-smedes/forgiving-does-not-erase-the-bitter-past-a-healed-memory-is-not-a-2/) [Lewis B. Smedes](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/lewis-b-smedes/) > [“But not forgiving yourself often becomes the root of severe self-loathing extreme self hatred and intense inhibitions. It will be next to impossible to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sue-augustine/but-not-forgiving-yourself-often-becomes-the-root-of-severe-self/) [Sue Augustine](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sue-augustine/) ## More by Richard Walters > [What is forgiving? Forgiving is giving up all claim on one who had hurt you and letting go of the emotional consequences of the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-walters/what-is-forgiving-forgiving-is-giving-up-all-claim-on-one-who-had/) [Richard Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-walters/) > [There comes a time in every relationship when it's damaging to seek justice, when settling the score only stirs the fire. There comes a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-walters/there-comes-a-time-in-every-relationship-when-it-s-damaging-to-seek/) [Richard Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-walters/) > [We have a stewardship responsibility to keep ourselves healthy physically and emotionally. If we don't, we cannot carry out our obligations to God, to…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-walters/we-have-a-stewardship-responsibility-to-keep-ourselves-healthy/) [Richard Walters](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-walters/) [Explore all 4 Richard Walters quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-walters/) ## More Ability quotes > [I don't think there's a direct correlation between my sexuality and my skiing ability. But I think because I was so concerned about it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gus-kenworthy/i-don-t-think-there-s-a-direct-correlation-between-my-sexuality-and/) [Gus Kenworthy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gus-kenworthy/) > [“the importance of ability. The things that make a great job great, I discovered, are rare and valuable. If you want them in your…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cal-newport/the-importance-of-ability-the-things-that-make-a-great-job-great-i/) [Cal Newport](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cal-newport/) > [Ambition drives you on, ability certainly helps, but the fickle finger of fate and luck are great things.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/fergus-henderson/ambition-drives-you-on-ability-certainly-helps-but-the-fickle-finger/) [Fergus Henderson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/fergus-henderson/) > [The ability of the gospel to unite us on common strengths and common truths is one of the great miracles . . . of the gospel.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jeffrey-r-holland/the-ability-of-the-gospel-to-unite-us-on-common-strengths-and-common/) [Jeffrey R. Holland](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jeffrey-r-holland/) > [Maybe law enforcement would like the ability to turn on the camera on your Mac.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-cook/maybe-law-enforcement-would-like-the-ability-to-turn-on-the-camera-on/) [Tim Cook](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-cook/) > [I've seen guys come along with more ability - they've been faster or bigger or stronger - but they never worked hard to develop…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/steve-largent/i-ve-seen-guys-come-along-with-more-ability-they-ve-been-faster-or/) [Steve Largent](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/steve-largent/) > [The youth of India has the strength to move the entire World with a click of a mouse, we have generated that ability!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/narendra-modi/the-youth-of-india-has-the-strength-to-move-the-entire-world-with-a/) [Narendra Modi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/narendra-modi/) > [Time hath not yet so dried this blood of mine, Nor age so eat up my invention, Nor fortune made such havoc of my…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/william-shakespeare/time-hath-not-yet-so-dried-this-blood-of-mine-nor-age-so-eat-up-my/) [William Shakespeare](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/william-shakespeare/) > [An absolutely necessary part of a writer's equipment, almost as necessary as talent, is the ability to stand up under punishment, both the punishment…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irwin-shaw/an-absolutely-necessary-part-of-a-writer-s-equipment-almost-as/) [Irwin Shaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irwin-shaw/) > [I'd be more frightened by not using whatever abilities I'd been given. I'd be more frightened by procrastination and laziness.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/denzel-washington/i-d-be-more-frightened-by-not-using-whatever-abilities-i-d-been-given/) [Denzel Washington](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/denzel-washington/) > [Bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. Take what I cannot give: my heart, body, thoughts, time, abilities, money, health, strength,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/elizabeth-prentiss/bring-into-captivity-every-thought-to-the-obedience-of-christ-take/) [Elizabeth Prentiss](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/elizabeth-prentiss/) > [You can only do the work to the very best of your ability.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christine-baranski/you-can-only-do-the-work-to-the-very-best-of-your-ability/) [Christine Baranski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christine-baranski/) > [Judge a person not by his ability to make money but by his ability to retain it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/vikrant-parsai/judge-a-person-not-by-his-ability-to-make-money-but-by-his-ability-to/) [Vikrant Parsai](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/vikrant-parsai/) > [Balance is the ability to be happy in the midst of the most chaotic or even boring or transient circumstance.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/frederick-lenz/balance-is-the-ability-to-be-happy-in-the-midst-of-the-most-chaotic/) [Frederick Lenz](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/frederick-lenz/) > [Bobby had faith in my ability as a singer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/julie-london/bobby-had-faith-in-my-ability-as-a-singer/) [Julie London](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/julie-london/) [Browse all 9,990 Ability quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/ability/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Not forgiving prolongs hurt and anger and leads to smoldering resentment, which will make us miserable until it kills us. 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